It seems that every avenue for a lonely male to find a girlfriend is being abolished and whittled down to OLD swipes

Mrs_Drgree · 2023-04-29T13:31:15+00:00

No rants

Treacle-Flimsy · 2023-04-29T12:31:07+00:00

That's why you should never listen to dating advice from women. You gotta approach anywhere you feel comfortable regardless how it might look on the outside

THHBHStT · 2023-04-29T12:35:58+00:00

You named exactly zero avenues that have been taken away from people to go out and meet others.

Can you share what avenues you mean by that? People still go to bars and clubs, church, hobby groups etc so idk where this notion avenues are being abolished

Also don’t listen to women when it comes to dating, especially negatives like “don’t approach me unless I’m XYZ.” Most people, esp women, let things happen rather than make things happen. Ofc when people are used to letting things happen, they’ll set up your own expectations, doesn’t mean you have to follow them

Soloandthewookiee · 2023-04-29T12:39:55+00:00

on one hand they are hitting record numbers in singleness and sexlesness

Source?

it's ok to be virgin just not incl" because for people inc\l = virgin who airs his frustrations.

No, an incel is a virgin (although, quite often, is not actually a virgin) who blames women for their problems. That absolutely deserves to be shamed.

If you see a cute girl you shouldn't approach because it's shallow to base your romantic interest on physical appearances

What is actually being said is just because you find a woman attractive doesn't mean that she owes you her time and attention.

If every man approached every woman that he finds attractive, then many women would be getting approached all day long. Is she supposed to stop and listen to every dude hit on her? When is she finally allowed to say "fuck off and leave me alone?"

DeshaunWalt · 2023-04-29T12:22:52+00:00

Nah fuck being seen by as predatory by a few internet people

Gotta cold approach all the bad bitches if you want any change of making your dating life better as a virgin

When l was virgin, l would cold approach women in public all the time and never be seen as predatory since l was respectful

Sometimes l didn't because l played as a wingman or it was my friends turn

We would also go to clubs/bars on many weekends, and most of my friends got laid there and others like myself met their first gf

If your in uni or HS, it's the best to approach since your in the same ecosystem

So key advice, JUST DO IT

whyamiherewhatawaste · 2023-04-29T12:37:15+00:00

Only on Reddit and Tumblr do recluse cat herding women say you can't approach women irl. I don't know one single woman in real life who doesn't see it as a compliment when she's approached. The problem is what you look like. I got approached by a handsome man in a suit once, I was ecstatic and gave my number. Another time, it was a fat kinda ugly dude who was shaking while he was trying to make casual convo on a bus stop. I was not flattered then

I hate to say it but the same rules apply on dating apps as in real life. If you're ugly, fat, short and work at Walmart, you won't have any more luck in real life. There's no secret untapped source of single women.

puddingbike · 2023-04-29T12:48:57+00:00

It seems that every avenue for a lonely male to find a girlfriend is being abolished and whittled down to OLD swipes

Wrong. There's all the same opportunities there's always been: and, by that I mean the entire world. There's women in the grocery store, at the mall, at the gym, in the park, everywhere. Nothing's abolished. A man just needs the balls to walk up to a woman and say hello. SAME AS IT'S ALWAYS BEEN!

On this PPD, a recurring theme is a lot of dudes lacking balls...lacking the ability to risk rejection...so, these posters here find any excuse to avoid saying "Hey, I just don't have the required balls to risk rejection from a woman."

approaching women you don't know is seen as a faux pass at the very least, and predatory and worst. If you see a cute girl you shouldn't approach because it's shallow to base your romantic interest on physical appearances

Do it anyway. Stop being such a scared little pussy.

InjectAdrenochrome · 2023-04-29T12:24:13+00:00

Yeah generation Z is kind of screwed if they no longer prefer to date people they know irl

LillthOfBabylon · 2023-04-29T12:25:23+00:00

men are in a catch-22: on one hand they are hitting record numbers in singleness and sexlesness,

So are women.
Most people are still having sex.

society has brought back virgin shaming,

Hating incels is not virgin shaming.

and please, don't even try to attempt at a "it's ok to be virgin just not incl" because for people inc\l = virgin who airs his frustrations.

If their frustration is towards the opposite sex, they can fuck off. They’re no better than obnoxious blue haired psycho feminists on Twitter. That’s toxic, sexist, and most people don't want to deal with whiny self-pitying sexists.

it seems that every avenue for them to get an upper hand in the dating market is getting limited more and more, approaching women you don't know is seen as a faux pass at the very least, and predatory and worst.

Then approach peopm you know.

If you see a cute girl you shouldn't approach because it's shallow to base your romantic interest on physical appearances

No one says this. They say don't solely chasing the hottest women around. Actually find people who’d be interested in you.

Let's use stereotypes for example: If you’re a nerd, why are you trying to dating the head cheerleader? Go find another nerd, it would be easier to connect.

but women banging a hot guy don't need to explain their preferences to embittered virgin guys.

Exactly.

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Philip8000 · 2023-04-29T13:25:57+00:00

Another issue is, if you don't manage to form a social circle as a kid, or lack romantic experience as a teenager, it's hard to catch up. Relationships as a teenager might be shallow and not seem that important, but it does teach you what to do/say, what not to do/say, and there's a certain validation in knowing that someone can find you attractive and desirable.

Opportunities shrink as you get older, since people have jobs, families and other obligations, meaning they don't have the time they once possessed. Just about everyone I know formed their social circle when they were children, and additions they made as an adult were through childhood friends. If you fail to do that, for whatever reason, it's damned hard to form these connections after your mid-20s.

These videos you see on TikTok and elsewhere ranting about men approaching are a minority of women, but they still have an impact on those for whom this isn't an easy task. Confident men don't have to worry about it, because they can break the "rules" with minimal consequences. Creeps don't give a damn if women get uncomfortable, so long as they get laid.

I suspect many men on dating sites use them because they don't have many alternatives. We've got far more people of both genders lacking close social connections than was the case even 20 years ago. And there are those who rant about their lack of success, spewing misogyny. Sadly, even if you say: "I want a genuine relationship and my lack of success eats at me", the response will be about the same as if you said: "Women are disgusting cum dumpsters who compete to suck Chad's dick".

TheDustLord · 2023-04-29T13:37:45+00:00

Incel doesn’t exactly mean “virgin loser,” as many sexually successful men get called incels, even Henry Caville. It’s a completely meaningless insult at this point.

MistyMaisel · 2023-04-29T13:49:50+00:00

The retard didn't become autist. Retard was always just another word for stupid. People weren't even really thinking of retarded people when they slung it about. Autist is being used and people really are thinking of people with autism. It's not another word for stupid. And incel is not another word for virgin. It's classifying a very specific sort of person who happens to be a virgin. Virginity itself isn't being shamed until it is paired with insane autistic women blaming tendencies.

Nobody has to explain their preferences to anybody. However, if you come online looking for help, you'll probably have to explain your preferences and they may be found wanting.

There's still lots of places for people to meet. Online dating sucks and everyone knows it, but it is a great lazy and socially softer way to deal with people. So big surprise, lots of lazy and cowardly dudes will pick it over the other methods recommended.

The problem with cold approach isn't that it is shallow. It is that it is hugely ineffective, is an imposition upon women, and does generally creep women out because most of the dudes doing it lack the social skill to do it correctly.

And finally, the use of the phrase upper hand kind of says it all. You like euphemistic language, I'm sure you can unpack that one without my help.

Frankly, men have always struggled to get introductions to women. You used to have to be introduced by a person who already knew them, typically a male relative or a much older female relative. This idea things are worse than ever is ridiculous and just tells me men here have no idea how hard it was to meet women in ages past.

Title	It seems that every avenue for a lonely male to find a girlfriend is being abolished and whittled down to OLD swipes
Author	Napo_De_Leone
Upvotes	9
Comments	75
Date	April 29, 2023 12:06 PM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/132r6zf/it_seems_that_every_avenue_for_a_lonely_male_to/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/it-seems-that-every-avenue-for-a-lonely-male-to.1217316 https://theredarchive.com/post/1217316

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