The most expensive Happy Meal you’ll ever buy.

Overkillengine · 2021-08-15T01:50:11+00:00

Beware gentlemen, some Penis Fly Traps are better disguised than others, but there are still going to be tells that give them away if you are thinking with the right head.

She only looks better than other options out there her age right now but note the following:

1) She had a combination of either poor discipline/judgement and became a single mom, and this will bleed over into multiple other aspects of her life.

2) She's looking for commitment on a hookup app.

3) She admits a past of non commitment worthy behaviors like casual hookups, but you, the reliable beast of burden Boxer will be expected to work yourself to death like a prole to get to touch her.

4) Her age. Her youth & beauty stocks are about to crater and she knows it and is trying to cash out pronto.

5) Her only positives explicitly displayed are: Working womb (for now), not fat (for now), not ugly (yet), not over 30 (yet). By the time you get done vetting her for other problems, one or more of those will probably change.

TLDR; Don't be stupid enough to pay the same price for a happy meal that you would for a for a full course Wagyu steak dinner at a 5-star restaurant.

Impressive-Cricket-8 · 2021-08-15T00:18:27+00:00

Take away the kid and this would have been a win for somebody. And now I want nuggets.

Land_of_the_Losers · 2021-08-15T00:20:55+00:00

Man, the human-shaped infiltrators that are being sent to investigate Earth by the UFO-beings are getting more and more lifelike. Only their faulty cultural-linguistic knowledge gives them away.

Harry_Teak · 2021-08-15T22:26:59+00:00

Her looks pretty much guarantee she'll never settle for the sad bastards who'd do more than hit & quit a single mother. She still thinks she's a steak dinner when she's actually fast food.

InevitableOwl1 · 2021-08-15T06:36:32+00:00

The self delusion of women, claiming they are a "happy meal" when all they bring is financial instability and aggravation and sadness.

No, woman, you are incorrect. You are a leach, mentally, physically, financially..

bartbitsu · 2021-08-15T14:51:13+00:00

The happy meal is supposed to make me happy. This is a sad meal.

karimamin · 2021-08-15T22:53:57+00:00

I understand her trying to be different with the happy meal analogy and see no problem with it. What I have issue is she wrote #milf and should be treated as such then. She didn't write #MILM (Mother I'd like to marry) so to me, it seems she wants another Chad.

Siehdue · 2021-08-15T01:40:44+00:00

ill pass them fries soggy by now

Cavannah · 2021-08-15T04:06:25+00:00

A worn-out person making worn-out jokes while wearing out their welcome in the dating market as they waste away what little time remains of their prime years.

The whole scenario perfectly emblematizes everything wrong with OLD and the majority of people who use such services.

MrNeurotypical · 2021-08-15T19:53:06+00:00

I might rent her but I ain't buying.

AmbitiousHornet · 2021-08-15T08:22:19+00:00

Plusses are her job and musical taste. Minuses are everything else. She's fairly hot now, but where will see be in 10-years after you've spent a fortune maintaining her high maintenance self?

Hunk_Maggot · 2021-08-15T22:17:14+00:00

This is the kind of "happy" meal where the burger is bitten and the fries are soggy , thinking how relieved you will feel when you throw it in a trash can.

Marko_From_Tropoja_ · 2021-08-17T21:07:13+00:00

Pic was most definitely before the kid

NightOuts · 2021-08-18T03:49:58+00:00

bro, a woman can say any damn thing and got matches out the ass lmao

Griever114 · 2021-08-18T16:53:50+00:00

Happy meal a alogy sounds right.

poor nutrition
poor quality materials
will come back to bite you in the ass if you keep having it.
cheap and easy

Joaquino7997 · 2021-08-15T01:11:14+00:00

Clever wit...but no cigar. Swipe left, gents.

ZarBandit · 2021-08-15T03:18:37+00:00

Old fast food certainly looks the same as when you bought it.

2021-08-16T01:59:10+00:00

More and more I feel like a 1940's film noir private detective, only EVERY PERSON I interact with or see is the criminal/scumbag/bad guy and no one is my client.

AisuKiba · 2021-08-17T22:26:04+00:00

Happy meals: cheap, often bad for you, and only fulfills the stomach for a couple hours. This woman just described herself to a T.

bigrome347 · 2021-08-19T01:32:40+00:00

A lot of men who don’t talk to pretty girls often or ever in their lives will fall for the trap. Most guys never had a chance at a pretty girl in her prime and when she goes to the market with this résumé a lot of men snag her up because they believe this is the best deal that they can get. Truly sad actually. She is the type of woman to marry you and sleep with other men while married to you. then say she’s not happy and divorce you. The typical men she targets are men in S.T.E.M And she leads with I like marvel, video games, or anime etc. she will cheat on you then divorce you and take half of your 401(k), kick you out the marital home, put you on child support and if she can get alimony. 😔😔😔😔😔. How man still fall for the trap is astounding. 🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐

Imperium_Britannia · 2021-08-17T18:30:20+00:00

I am too old for happy meal

One-Move · 2021-08-17T22:18:26+00:00

Someone tell her, that the happy meal does not come with a kid, but is for kids. So I would take her without kid. No just kidding I don’t do American women anymore

Vagrant_Jin · 2021-08-17T23:45:54+00:00

That ain't no Happy Meal. She's a whole Migraine Meal

HistoricalReception7 · 2021-08-18T14:16:17+00:00

I've gotta give her credit for that line, i'm totally gonna use it when I get desperate enough to curate a mediocre Tinder profile

PopularBug5 · 2021-08-19T06:31:16+00:00

Have some decency you tramps. Are bras not a thing anymore?

alienmuseum · 2021-08-19T14:35:24+00:00

That happy meal is half-eaten and it looks like some guy left enough sperms there to sprout a kid. NTY.

theLOLbird · 2021-08-19T18:30:41+00:00

Name of the kid tattooed on the chest... Typical

GlobalFlyer6500 · 2021-08-21T02:00:30+00:00

Those will turn into huge saggers in 2-5 yrs too. No fakes, no dates.

DefiantFlatworm4833 · 2021-08-24T21:00:15+00:00

Girls like her is why I don’t go to the bars anymore! I bring one home and always regretted it a week later!

Mindanomalia · 2021-08-28T22:03:31+00:00

Thats actually pretty funny

wsbretard4lyfe · 2021-08-29T16:27:00+00:00

Jesus my eyes almost got me into trouble, beautiful cans. Already made poor choices in a mate hard pass. What the fuck does a bookkeeper do?

The most expensive Happy Meal you’ll ever buy.

Comments

I hope the sex was worth it....

Title	The most expensive Happy Meal you’ll ever buy.
Author	jd46249
Upvotes	181
Comments	91
Date	August 14, 2021 11:43 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen/comments/p4irfg/the_most_expensive_happy_meal_youll_ever_buy/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen/the-most-expensive-happy-meal-youll-ever-buy.1217908 https://theredarchive.com/post/1217908