Another relationship that didn’t work out …

astral1 · 2023-06-02T16:34:04+00:00

Personally I’ve found more success in just not taking relationships seriously. And I don’t mean like, cheating, or being emotionally unavailable, I just mean not turning everything into a Disney movie (speaking about myself) It’s the same with me, I get really attached, and it makes everything so dramatic. Lately I just keep telling myself ‘stop taking everything so seriously’ and I’ve been having more and more fun with my partner. And she told me that she feels so much better about everything.
I worry if she is straying of course, but , it’s been more mentally healthy for me to just let things be. Everytime I worry now I just tell myself over and over to let it go. Someone I study with , Ram dass, says we have to choose between “being free and being right”

CountTheBees · 2023-06-02T12:36:24+00:00

What exactly has gone wrong - how do you know the relationship's over? Are you sure something else isn't bothering him?

frozone65 · 2023-06-02T16:08:16+00:00

Hi, you have to be careful with SMV it can give women a false sense of security. You may be good looking and physically fit, but from the title of your post it seems that relationships keep fizzling out. For women a higher SMV is great for getting relationships off the ground, you may attract lots of men but other things like a compatible personality etc keep men interested and allow the relationship to grow deeper.

I suggest that you be open and simply ask him if there’s anything wrong or if things have changed. And if they have then ask him what specifically turned him off or marked a turning point. You may have to press him because guys often don’t like to speak honestly with women. Don’t take his response personally and don’t take it to be the gospel truth, it’s just his opinion. But at least it will help give you some insight and stop the worrying and uncertainty for you.

Now this may not apply to you and please please don’t take this the wrong way. Attractive women often have some unattractive personality characteristics. And when I say unattractive I don’t mean that she’s a terrible person or anything like that but from a guy’s standpoint characteristics that may seem incongruous with your beauty. It seems to come from getting a lot of male attention from and early age and men just capitulating to anything attractive women do and say just to be with them, but that’s just my opinion. However, this can lead to a mind set that is at odds with maintaining a relationship.

It’s a strange thing for guys because to be honest when guys get together with a beautiful woman they just kind of inherently think that all aspects of her will be beautiful too. So let’s say as a guy, your beautiful girlfriend has some selfish tendencies or can seem a bit entitled or sometimes a bit mean. That for a guy can be off putting because guys are often doing a subconscious mental calculation of what they can put up with for a lifetime. And that’s weighed against your beauty. Every guy has a different threshold for what is acceptable but most guys have a point at which they are no longer interested. However, at the same time most guys are not willing to tell you what it is or when you’re crossing it. They will just become distant and unfortunately the relationship will fizzle. And you’re left wondering what just happened. Men in general shouldn’t be afraid of having honest conversations with women. But for most men uncomfortable conversations are just easier to avoid. Hence men are labeled as and often are poor communicators. And, I will take one for the team and say we apologize for that.

thedawnfrisian · 2023-06-02T15:18:03+00:00

Maybe he thinks the relationship is fizzling out on your side, which is why he is being more cold and detached. Especially if like you said, he is lower SMV than you.

If the relationship is going to end anyway, it might just be worth having the conversation with him and asking him where he stands.

Jenneapolis · 2023-06-02T22:38:17+00:00

I’m not sure how long you’ve been dating but some of this naturally happens after the first few months of a relationship when the honeymoon stage wears off. It’s pretty common that guys withdraw a little bit. They quit texting so often and become less emotional in their language. It usually means they don’t feel like they have to try so hard and can settle comfortably into the relationship (which is good!) or sometimes they are losing interest (bad!). But a very common female reaction to that is to freak out and either pick fights or become passive aggressive and distant. This is no good and can lead to the guy just giving up.

The best you can do is try to stay feminine and positive. If you do decide to talk to him about it, choose a moment when it’s relaxed and face-to-face and do not be accusatory. Maybe ask him how he is feeling about the way the relationship is progressing but do not be too blunt and ask why he’s not doing xyz anymore. If your concern is the trip for example, just ask if you are still going and if you can help with making plans. And then take him at his word.

Secretagenta92 · 2023-06-02T12:33:35+00:00

Learn emotional detachment. He love bombed you and you fell for it. Feminine boundaries are crucial to not fall into this.

Agreeable-Comedian24 · 2023-06-02T19:54:02+00:00

I’m a little confused by your previous post asking about the potential of long distance relationships. How long have you two actually been a couple? And are you long distance? It seems like there may be more to your story. Finding men who are truly mentally, emotionally and physically available is really important.

AutoModerator · 2023-06-02T11:40:46+00:00

Title: Another relationship that didn’t work out …

Full text: Hi all, I’d love to get some advice.

I’m worried I’m going wrong somewhere when it comes to dating. I’ve taken so much red pill advice on board but I’m feeling lost.

I’ve been dating a guy who travels for work a lot, and it just seems to be fizzling. His communication has become dry and no talk of future plans for the last month.

This guy seemed head over heels when we met start of the year, and I was thinking he could be my husband.

I’m not even sure what happened. It could be the pressure of having a make a big commitment due to the distance and someone possibly moving. But I’ve seen so many couples recently who aren’t even in the same country making plans against the odds to be together.

I feel so down as I really tried hard this time (RMV stuff). It seems to happen always happen to me… promising relationships that I get so happy about. And the suddenly they just fizzle.

The other surprising thing … not to sound conceited but I have much higher SMV than him and he made that clear. He seemed so enamoured.

^{This is the original text of the post and this is an automated service}

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

Arod-Reddit · 2023-06-03T02:32:53+00:00

If your smv was higher than you could’ve made him wait for sex for a few more dates, to show his interest. Giving it up too soon can end things no matter what the attractiveness gap is.

Frameworkeee · 2023-06-04T21:10:47+00:00

I have much higher SMV than him

All women have higher SMV than men. Even an below average in attractiveness woman has an easier time getting sex with whoever she wants than an above average in attractive man.

Title	Another relationship that didn’t work out …
Author	Independent-Hall4929
Upvotes	16
Comments	31
Date	June 2, 2023 11:40 AM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/13ya9ji/another_relationship_that_didnt_work_out/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/another-relationship-that-didnt-work-out.1221038 https://theredarchive.com/post/1221038

Comments