Idk if anyone else gets these feeling sometimes as this is something I've been thinking about recently.

I joined a new social group that's pretty left leaning by nature and I hadn't been kicked out yet, but there was a moment where I asked a female member there a question that I thought was normal at the time but she was very defensive when I casually asked her (I was made aware of this a couple weeks later after it was all said and done). At the time, I couldn't figure out if it was a social blunder on my part or just something personal specifically to her idk, but I was already used to people nonverbally hinting they're uncomfortable (something I was never good at picking up until after reading a shit ton of social books) and even though I'm at a level where I can read reactions, I very much hated looking deep into them and remember going crazy overthinking gestures and thinking "why the fuck couldn't they just tell me what was bothering them." and I still very much feel like this today.

At that moment I decided if that's how they're gonna be, then I'm gonna interact with them as less as possible and focus on other members of the group and not go on that topic much longer. It was a couple weeks after I decided this that I was then verbally told by her bf that what I had asked her was not the right time and place which means now I know it was a social blunder on my part (and he was pretty much understanding at the time.) I acknowledged my mistake and we talked it out, so as of yday we're both moving on from that incident.

However, there was a thought I had in my mind I couldn't really let go of. It's this feeling of general left-leaning groups prioritizing the feelings of women's comfort over men. I can't help but think if they thought I was an individual who just made an honest mistake, or they see a bad man just waiting to slip out of the cracks so they have an 'excuse' to pounce on.

I have been thinking of this due to being aware of women going to other women for their approval of men, male feminist pandering to them in leftist circles, and a lot of this is done behind your back so it's like they want to keep you in the dark so you're least likely to protect yourself.

So sometimes I wonder at what point do I consider these are genuine mistakes I made, or it's just gaslighting to make you think you're the bad guy for completely normal due to the left demonizing men a lot?

I feel like being called out for genuine wrongdoing and the male demonizing produce the exact same feelings and I feel it will hinder my ability to differentiate between the 2 and hold myself accountable for the genuine mistakes I have made and make me more unreasonably resentful of women or left-leaning spaces.

I wonder if anyone else gets this feeling sometimes and how they handle it.