Did anybody read ‘Of boys and men’ by Richard Reeves?

SpicyMarshmellow · 2024-02-29T20:53:56+00:00

I haven't read the book, but I've seen multiple interviews with him. I have mixed opinions. I appreciate that he's advocating public concern for the well being of males, and he makes some powerful statements to substantiate that we are in crisis. (Side Note: I hate saying "Boys & Men" it's so linguistically awkward and unnecessary and makes it sound like we're talking about two unrelated things at the same time when we're talking about one group united by one common feature. Boys become men, after all, so boy's issues are men's issues.) And I understand the need to present the message in a way that the public will accept.

But I think some of his ideas reek of sexism, and will be counter-productive. He interprets boy's academic difficulties as having to do with boys developing slower than girls, without acknowledging the well-evidenced institutional bias against boys in our education systems. So he's preferring a biological essentialist stance that portrays males negatively when there is a readily available alternative explanation. He wants to delay boy's education by a year to compensate. I think if his proposal is adopted, it will only reinforce sexist attitudes, deepen sexism within educational institutions, and further disadvantage us.

Imagine growing up as a girl. All of your male classmates are a year or more older than you. You're told this is because boys develop slower, and that boys the same age as you wouldn't be able to keep up with you academically. Would you, as that girl, grow up to be a woman who has respect for men? How about when that girl grows up to be a teacher?

And how does it help boys with establishing disciplined, focused behavior in school (the lack of which based on bioessentialist factors being proposed as the reason boys are failing) if they are not required to develop discipline and focus skills until a year later than girls are?

gratis_eekhoorn · 2024-03-01T07:30:00+00:00

At first I really disliked him, still not a big fan of him but now if my observations are not mistaken he seems to be more brave at calling out institutional discrimination against men and boys and even feminism than he used to be. I've always had a kind of wishful thinking theory about him that he was talking badly about MRAs and not calling out instutional discrimination and feminists only because he wanted become mainstream but never really believed it but now that seems to be within the realm of possibilities.

OppositeBeautiful601 · 2024-03-01T14:03:31+00:00

He's respected and he's advocating for men and boys in a way that's not "pull yourself up for your own bootstraps, stop whining" like feminists do. I like that.

griii2 · 2024-03-07T09:33:28+00:00

I did and I have mixed feelings about that book. On one hand he is doing a good job talking about the problems, on the other is too scared to openly talk about the root causes.

Sometimes it felt like he is just one step away from saying that men's problems are a proof that men need feminism too.

hehimCA · 2024-03-01T00:16:36+00:00

I think he has a great way with words and has introduced mens issues to a huge audience that wasn’t talking about them before.

I think he learned a lot from others before him like Warren Farrell, but he was able to get on CNN, PBS, and CBS morning news in a way that Farrell couldn’t. I’ve had so many people say that they first heard about male gender from him. So he’s gotten through where others haven’t.

By and large I agree with him; on a few things I don’t but in general his presence is advancing male advocacy.

Few-Procedure-268 · 2024-03-01T13:47:40+00:00

I think Reeves is generally a really insightful writer and analyst.

Before he worked on gender he had a great little book called Dream Hoarders that addressed class inequality. It argued that Left criticism of the 1% problematically downplays how much the top 20% benefit from economic inequality and how they play a/the central role in maintaining inequality and reducing economic mobility.

One thing I like about him is his ability to recognize when our impulse to blame (the 1%, feminists/women) gets in the way of thinking about broader causal forces and potential policy solutions.

flaumo · 2024-03-01T09:46:06+00:00

I read and liked it.

The point is he is liberal, so he is not opposed to liberal feminism. Women can choose their gender roles, marry and have kids or have a career. He supports female self determination. What he argues is that men have not kept up with the change feminism has started for women. Men need to adapt and renew their gender roles, the traditional provider and protector is largely irrelevant.

urbanman2004 · 2024-08-29T23:57:30+00:00

Reeves comes across as a grifter just taking advantage of the current climate of the "lonely male" epidemic. He teeters on the edge of acknowledging the neglect society has towards male issues, but he doesn't get into the specifics of what is ultimately causing those said issues and we (as men) all know it, but he won't say the quiet part out loud which I believe is rooted in fear that the sisterhood/matriarchy (supporters) turning against him. He literally came out of nowhere w/in the last couple of years professing his support male rights advocacy which I find quite odd, but convenient.

GenXer845 · 2024-11-22T19:53:01+00:00

As a woman, I have 50% listening to it so far and it explains to me my problems with dating men. I went to private school in the US and have a high vocabulary and reading skills (I read 50 novels per year on average). I had several exes who questioned my intelligence asking me if I knew the definition of the vocabulary word outright when I said it to quiz my intelligence and diminish me. I've realize that these men feel lesser than and not needed. I am also a very independent woman and they would look so crestfallen when I didn't need their help, for as an only child I am incredibly self sufficient.

I believe we need to do better with men's wages and education and helping them find their new place in this modern world. Encourage more SAHF and more emotional intelligence and vulnerability. Men are angry because they don't feel needed and we can't go backwards, but need to transform how we view men and men's roles in society. The author has a lot good points and solutions to these issues.

Title	Did anybody read ‘Of boys and men’ by Richard Reeves?
Author	Blauwpetje
Upvotes	57
Comments	38
Date	February 29, 2024 2:27 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates/comments/1b31l15/did_anybody_read_of_boys_and_men_by_richard_reeves/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates/did-anybody-read-of-boys-and-men-by-richard-reeves.1246781 https://theredarchive.com/post/1246781

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