5 Exercises for better eye contact

The_Alpha_Bro · 2013-04-24T18:10:31+00:00

It says to maintain eye contact for 10 seconds if you catch her looking.

Look into the mirror for 10 seconds.. if you feel weird just imaging how a stranger would feel. It's creepy.

funkmasterfelix · 2013-04-24T17:13:50+00:00

I once did an exercise like this in san francisco on my way to work. A gay dude thought i was for sure coming onto him and like followed me for 3 blocks telling me how beautiful i was. it was a nice ego stroking, but it sucked when he wouldn't go away after a while. super awkward.

obihansolo · 2013-04-24T16:37:18+00:00

In any situation where you have a customer - service employee type relationship you'll tend to find that a lot of people never give eye contact or acknowledge them, and doing so is both easy, because you're in a situation where your mind is far more likely to tell you it's acceptable, social anxieties be damned, than it is in the case of strangers you don't have any reason to deal with.

both easy and what?!

rubygeek · 2013-04-24T18:07:36+00:00

Woa, my experience with this is completely different and this is way over complicating things.

When I stare someone in the eyes, they look away after a second or 2 99% of the time. If they don't look away, then smile and approach.

Sexual_Wookie · 2013-04-24T17:05:45+00:00

Considering I live in Los Angeles I'm going to opt out of maintaining eye contact "On the street".

sergentpeper1967 · 2013-04-24T16:48:00+00:00

Definitely agree with the third one. I work as a cashier, and I am always trying to make eye contact...but it's about a 50-50 split of people looking down and avoiding looking at you, or being nice and responding to you.

starts_s_ends_lick · 2013-04-24T15:05:16+00:00

Love it. Building up to making comfortable eye contact with strangers was a huge confidence booster for me that I'm still improving. It's very helpful to have the more flirty techniques outlined and explained like this - thanks!

pheldozer · 2013-04-24T19:09:41+00:00

Do try to improve your eye contact at all times, but keep these fixed times in your diary and set an alarm.

at long last, a reason to unwrap my eye contact training diary and alarm clock!

Bignigelman · 2013-04-24T18:02:29+00:00

Be careful with step one. Some people get intimidated from just staring at them, almost got into a fight at a party because of it. Also, lots of crazy people on the streets think eye contact is enough to initiate conversation. Basically, choose carefully who you're going to stare at.

ImJustAMan · 2013-04-24T17:28:55+00:00

[permanently deleted]

greenzego · 2013-04-24T15:56:24+00:00

Good read i've been to realize more and more eye contact was part of my approach anxiety. I don't even approach females anymore if i don't get some type of eye contact or body language indicating there open to being approached. Now i have way better results but if im drunk all that goes out the window then my mouth piece just takes over.

rogicar · 2013-04-24T20:24:07+00:00

Some of these exercises are slightly terrifying. I've always thought that I'd come across as an ax murderer if I make eye contact with some random girl for longer than 2 seconds.

Have I just been making this "don't want to come across as a creeper" as an excuse to avoid these anxious situations or is it completely normal to have prolonged eye contact with strangers you meet on the street (3+seconds)?

cryogenisis · 2013-04-25T01:10:15+00:00

Its like push ups for your eyeballs.

Sambo1991 · 2013-04-25T05:45:49+00:00

just train yourself by watching this video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iwM4fborwJk

Jamdestroyer · 2013-04-24T17:09:21+00:00

I've always had problems with this, what if you have a problem where my left eye goes off in a random direction that I can usually control but when I try to focus on something that eye goes off in one direction, especially when i'm nervous.

Edit: Terminology

hedsnz · 2013-04-24T22:19:46+00:00

Smile and give her a little wink. Smile, then gently bite your lips a little bit. Smile, bit your lips then tilt your head and smirk.

Oh god I'd feel like such a douchebag! Other than a few of those things, the article looks like it has some good ideas.

berlinbrown · 2013-04-25T00:46:35+00:00

I don't mind eye contact when I need to make eye contact. I just decided I don't need to make contact ... with everyone.

cokecaine · 2013-04-25T01:01:39+00:00

I find it hilarious I have no problem keeping eye contact with people I don't give a damn about, even if it's an attractive lady. As soon as I want to initiate something more, my eyes wander.

likeabenz · 2013-04-25T01:43:45+00:00

"Meet the eyes of as many people as possible over your allotted time - aim for at least half an hour, more if you can" - as a guy, this will result in an ass kicking.

Emerce_Yourself · 2013-04-25T02:44:53+00:00

If you don't care about eye contact but want to appear as you do, look at there chin.

Disclaimer: Not advocating no eye contact, but sometimes you just dont give a fuck and want to seem interested while someone is talking.

strppngynglad · 2013-04-25T03:32:36+00:00

Just reading this sprung my anxieties. Last night at the gym me and this girl kept looking at eachother for about an hour at least. I had no idea what to do. I have the ultimate approach anxiety- I guess I have never even gone for it.

rubygeek · 2013-04-25T04:20:23+00:00

As a woman can I just say the tips involving biting your lips, sticking your tongue out or rubbing your chin are all douche moves. I don't know of a single girl who would go for that unless they're insecure, a little crazy or just like douche- bro types.

mileshigh_23 · 2013-04-25T04:56:51+00:00

The whole eye contact thing is way over rated. I seriously got a neurosis consciously trying to maintain eye contact so much when I was actively trying to do it all the time. Far better to just be relaxed and comfortable and then let the eye contact flow from that.

DranDran · 2013-04-25T10:52:55+00:00

What about people who wear sunglasses? This always unnerves me, whenever I try to practice eye contact with strangers on the street, someone with sunglasses always psyches me out.. are they glancing back? are they ignoring? what do I do?! Look! don't look! Look away! Look back! Smile! Eugh. Too late, they are gone.

Sometimes I feel like Gollum.

MarsayMarsac · 2013-04-25T11:16:35+00:00

A lot of you are talking about being afraid to look creepy. What is creepy anyway? Does doing this exercise qualify you as a creepy person? If you know that you are not creepy then why be afraid. If she is perceiving you as a creepy person then that is totally her's inner problem.

Debonair_Gambit · 2013-04-25T15:41:10+00:00

Note to self: NOT the best idea to try this in the gym.

koreancowboy · 2013-04-25T21:34:18+00:00

Whenever I'm talking to someone, I'll look at them at the beginning and end of my sentence/statement. Looking away while talking is normal, and looking at them (most of the time) while they're talking shows that you're paying attention...at least they hope that you are. LOL

ken0 · 2013-04-24T22:57:12+00:00

Hmm, I wish I sometimes lived in USA cause of the tips I read on this subreddit. honestly, some of them doesn't work here in Sweden, we're way too reserved here in general, I'm not saying everyone is, but in general people are a lot more reserved, sometimes these tips works cause you stand out of the crowd and not being too reserved yourself, or they're the reserved type and think you're weird instead. faced tons of reserved people but i think it has built my confidence instead. but wouldn't mind trying this tips on "normal" people haha. I should add i have american friends and discussed this with them etc, and overall my american friends are a lot more open. :)

sitadeeze · 2013-04-24T22:31:58+00:00

Since I'm in high school and have a girlfriend, should I still be trying to make eye contact with all sorts of different people? Especially women.

NoT_aRaCiSt · 2013-04-24T16:21:27+00:00

overthinking it much?

Title	5 Exercises for better eye contact
Author	rubygeek
Upvotes	513
Comments	88
Date	April 24, 2013 2:23 PM UTC (13 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1d0dyi/5_exercises_for_better_eye_contact/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/5-exercises-for-better-eye-contact.1298077 https://theredarchive.com/post/1298077

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