I met this HB7 at a bookstore, got her number and set up a date for Wednesday night. The bar I usually take girls to was closed, so we meet at a place I'm not 100% familiar with. As I'm walking there I hear a band playing from a block away, and when I get to the door I realize there's an expensive cover charge. Music is loud, I can barely hear anyone speak, I'm out of my element, and I feel weird that my date had to pay to get in. My state is broken. I see her at the bar, but now she has makeup and nice clothes and looks more like a HB9. I feel like she's out of my league, and she's also talking to some other guy. I approach her and give an awkward hug because I'm nervous. While we're talking I try to order a drink and the bartender ignores me. I am really frustrated with myself at this point.
I get my drink and we sit down. We're conversing, but she's not making eye contact and seems uninterested. I'm getting short, cold replies from her and it's killing me. At one point she mentioned her mom, and I asked her if her family lives in the same state (she moved here). She replies by saying bluntly, "I'm not going to talk to you about my family." That's when it hit me - This girl is being rude and I'm not going to blame myself for her behavior. I've had around two dates a week over the past two months, and all of those girls were fun, happy people. Those girls were worth my time. And my time is valuable. This completely changed my state. I stopped reacting to every little thing she said and started framing the conversation around what I'd rather talk about. She can join in and have fun or she can get the fuck out. I decided to continue the date for myself and have a good time, not being dependent on this girl as the source of my happiness. Then, after 15 min of talking, I realized she was totally into me now. She was making serious eye contact, smiling, letting her legs brush up against mine.
I told her it was loud and let's go to another bar. On the way there I grabbed her hand and held it, and I kissed her after getting our drinks at the second location. I suggested we go back to my place. She agreed and finished her beer really quickly, I really didn't expect her to be so eager. I drive her back to my place for the f-close. After sex we got to talking, and she admitted she is often depressed and anxious because she comes off like a bitch and has a hard time connecting with people.
Long story short - don't depend on other people for your happiness. You can't be consistently happy that way. Instead, be happy with yourself and people will come along and join you.
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