Telling women they are pretty or not?

tab13092 · 2018-03-23T14:47:48+00:00

My whole take on this, through various articles/posts and just my own experience, is that generally dudes are quick to toss out the "You're attractive/you're pretty/you're good looking" shit super quick thinking that it'll win a girl over or get her to like him more.

Realistically, if she's attractive she's both heard it a thousand times before and she probably already knows she's attractive.

I always complement women on various other aspects, both being honest and not taking the easy "You're hot" approach.

Of course if she's taken a lot of time to do her hair/make up and wear something really nice for you, naturally that warrants a "You look very beautiful" because she put effort and time in to it.

plowzedong · 2018-03-23T11:02:23+00:00

Women love to be desired by attractive men.

Generally, on the street, when you are meeting girls in public, you don't want tell women that.... unless is it very congruent with your feelings.

And that's where, IMO, ZP's magic lies. He's a very sensual person anyways, so him saying that is very congruent with his personality and sub-communication.

If anyone has a pdf of that book, can you pm plz..

ImJustSo · 2018-03-23T12:07:09+00:00

It's not that it is or isn't effective, because it is both.

It can have a negative effect on one interaction and a positive one in a different interaction.

I don't tell women they're pretty, because it's useless information and the success rate of it is: Maybe.

GuyFromDaStore · 2018-03-23T13:30:46+00:00

Nothing wrong with telling a woman she's pretty, because they obsess over wanting to feel pretty nearly every day of their lives. The trick is to say it properly and not make it sound cringey or creepy. Oh and make sure you're good looking.

innergamedude · 2018-03-23T13:14:01+00:00

Here's the problem with "you're pretty": people are really incredibly fucking obnoxiously repetitive and uncreative. If you have any notable external traits (e.g. being tall, having green hair, missing an arm), that is all you'll hear about strangers. Maybe you recall in Garden State when Zach Braff's character goes home and everyone he runs into is trying to give him some "great ideas for a movie", same idea.

If you're just one more stranger saying the same shit to her because she's pretty, you're putting her off more than if you didn't talk to her at all. And on the side, you're also one more dude who feels entitled to her body because she exists.

Talk to her and say something to her she hasn't heard. Notice something about her no one else has.

phpeters87 · 2018-03-23T16:41:28+00:00

Use compliments like salt; sparingly and only when necessary...

IllStep · 2018-03-23T17:04:39+00:00

Some pickup coaches will say this is exactly what you should be doing, and some will say that it's the absolute epitome of 'bad game'

That's the pickup industry for ya!

I guess the answer is to experiment with different stuff and see what works for you personally

WhatIsThisAccountFor · 2018-03-23T19:57:00+00:00

If a woman is genuinely beautiful and dresses/presents herself well, the only points you gain by telling her she’s beautiful is that she sees your confidence. The actual comment on her beauty means nothing to her cause she’s heard it 1000x before.

But, you can show your confidence without doing that. If you walk up to her and say something like “hey I like you”, that’s probably more meaningful to her than hearing she’s beautiful.

Telling a woman she’s beautiful will never gain you any headway unless she is either already interested in you, or she actually is not beautiful and no one ever says it to her. It can hurt you by coming off as a very generic compliment that just kinda goes in one ear and out the other.

Generally though, the only women who will not at least mildly appreciate that kind of compliment are the bitchy ones, who you actually have to game in order to have a chance with.

GET_IN_THE_VAN · 2018-03-23T22:23:27+00:00

Nothing wrong with telling a woman she's pretty. Matters who's saying it, who they are saying it to and what they mean when they say it.

Socialinception · 2018-03-23T22:29:12+00:00

If being man-to-woman is something you struggle with, then using direct compliments can help you get over that sticking point.

But if you're comfortable with being man-to-woman, there's no need to use direct compliments, they put on a lot of pressure which can lead a girl to look for an excuse to get out of the interaction. Plus, direct compliments can get you categorized as "thirsty guy who's trying to get in my pants" which isn't ideal.

LingeringGnome · 2018-03-24T00:06:13+00:00

Specificity is okay. "You have a really perky ass" or "your eyes are wild". "your hair is so long...awesome".

Generic is bad. "You are so hot." You're beautiful". "you're cute". Gorgeous women have heard that shit their entire lives. It's boring and lazy.

Jackieoo00 · 2018-03-23T11:07:08+00:00

Women want to feel valued. Being beautiful is definitely a valuable thing so its ok to appreciate that about her. What women are afraid of is a guy they cant trust. Many men can have success with women by simply decieving them and a lot of guys do. Women are simply trying to detect those types of guys and protect themselves from them. If a guy is overly fixative on physicality during inapropriate times it is a sign of deception. A man who makes her feel comfortable and touches her at apropriats times is a guy she has the potential to bond with sexually.

2018-03-23T14:12:42+00:00

I'd say it's not about what you say. It is about what you communicate.

Usually, you want to communicate that you are attracted to her and that you have no shame to admit this fact to yourself and her.

What is the best way to communicate that facts depends on dozens of factors. Depending on what type of person she or you are and where and when you are this can mean to tell her "you are beautiful and i want to get to know you better" or "I wanna fuck your brain out right now". Both sentences can communicate the same thing depending on the circumstances.

There is a chapter in Mark Manson's Models where he writes about this topic and takes a friend as an example who would tell woman he "would like to pee down their butthole" or sth like this...Appearently said friend was batshitcrazy and his line worked pretty good on crazy woman.

Nicks1234 · 2018-03-23T14:28:40+00:00

You should absolutely compliment a girl. Honestly no matter how many times you hear a compliment, if you feel it's coming from a genuine place, it will be nice to hear. BUT DO NOT shower her with compliments. This will come across as needy and will cause all of your compliments to lose their meaning and value. The BEST way I found to balance compliments is to do push/pull because this keeps the girl guessing whether or not you are into her even though she already knows you are. I wrote a post on this that might clear it up for you a little https://mysimpleconfidence.com/how-to-flirt-with-girls-the-best-technique-you-can-learn. Let me know if you have any questions on this and if you ever want to run a problem by me you can always email me at [email protected]. I'm always here to help

solomoc · 2018-03-24T02:24:40+00:00

No.

Words are silver but silence is golden.

WIA20XX · 2018-03-23T11:43:55+00:00

Why don't you go out there and try it? You'll find out soon enough if that strategy works

Title	Telling women they are pretty or not?
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	15
Comments	32
Date	March 23, 2018 10:04 AM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/86jhry/telling_women_they_are_pretty_or_not/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/telling-women-they-are-pretty-or-not.1443612 https://theredarchive.com/post/1443612

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