Is this hopeless while you aren’t who you want to be

WhatsTheAnswerDude · 2024-06-08T02:15:42+00:00

Reread what you wrote and ask if a girl would find that person attractive/would wanna consistently be around them?

You seem more depressed than anything.

Configure career/skills first and pick a path for your life or at least a plan.

Anything else us only gonna be a band aid.

Go_Brr · 2024-06-08T02:29:51+00:00

No idea what you do but you're attitude towards it is the probably the least sexy or seductive thing

No one cares if you work a boring office job. They only care if you care about it. It's hard to respect someone who refuses to do anything about a negative situation that they are in.

So yeah if you're talking shit about your job and not doing anything to address it.

Yeah it's not an attractive quality in the slightest

seducedyourmom · 2024-06-08T07:15:30+00:00

You are not your job, you're not how much money you have in the bank. You are not the car you drive. You're not the contents of your wallet. You are not your fucking khakis.

Western-Month-3877 · 2024-06-08T02:38:32+00:00

I believe a big chunk of population are pretty much in your situation. Do you think people on social media apps like Instagram are really as cool and promising as they look?

The thing with relationship you don’t start so serious too early. Imagine going on a first date by planning to watch something light like a romcom in a theater but both of you end up watching an extremely sad, bleak, dark dystopian themed one. Like the world’s gonna end tomorrow and no hope for humanity. Is that what you wanna do on first date?

If someone asks you what you do for a living just say “I could tell you but I have to kill you” in a playful manner. Like they’ll remember what your job is, anyway lol.

Offer something fun, cheerful, and show her how you perceive the world and yourself. Just because you’re not up there doesn’t mean you can’t smile and laugh.

But if you already started with a bleak one, the potential target will probably be slim. Maybe the emo/goth demographics.

MrAnonPoster · 2024-06-08T14:28:41+00:00

Yes. Your attitude about life seeps out through every single pore you have. Women notice it and stay the fuck away

xcoreflyup · 2024-06-08T02:17:51+00:00

It is not the career that kills it.

It is your decision of staying average, choosing to stay at that boring unfulfilling job that will kill it.

When you are an ambition, aggressive, goal oriented person, you will come out like one when you interact with people.

At the end of the day, self improvement is the ultimate end game of meeting women. habit is everything

harmlessdjango · 2024-06-08T03:04:24+00:00

Man, I relate to your struggle. I, too, am currently in a career that I would like to change. And I can't change it easily because too many people depend on me. I understand this feeling of being stuck and having sometimes this feeling of disassociation while at work

What I decided to do was find something after work that excites me. The way someone in this sub out it "Something you enjoy so much that you would rather skip a date with a cute woman than miss it." It's been theater and comedy classes for me. Now I have something that I look forward to every week. Now, I look forward more to these classes than the weekend itself. They make me feel alive and like I'm 14 years old again.

I don't know if you already have something else going on, but if not, give this a try. The vitality that you'll get from living according to your desires is unparalleled. I swear to God I noticeably get more looks when I'm on my way to these classes. Even my friend who was walking there with me commented on it

I hope this simple advice helps

Holiday_Round_4676 · 2024-06-08T04:32:05+00:00

It is just an excuse for you to stall while you reach some future promised land

slowupwardclimb · 2024-06-08T03:20:06+00:00

Your situation itself is not hopeless, but it sounds like you kind of are. If you have no passion for anything, then maybe you need to expose yourself to more things: ideas, experiences, possibilities. Do you think life is just going to show up at your front door one day with all the answers?

Get out there!

And yes, lack of purpose is less attractive than having purpose.

Objective-Piano7112 · 2024-06-08T04:45:41+00:00

I don't think the job is your problem, it's internal. I scored my amazing girlfriend with a job I not only didn't enjoy but made shit money. But I was unapologetic and had vision for where I wanted to be. Nit much is more attractive to a woman than a man with vision and drive. And confidence that is unapologetic. Sounds like you need to build yourself up either with the gym,doing good things for others, having a good social life,etc. The good news is you're in total control of making these improvements.

Dandys3107 · 2024-06-08T08:26:32+00:00

Well, girls can easily sense that you have no passion for life. Boring unfilling job should just serve a purpose of optimal form of survival, you need to balance it with something that is worth making such sacrifice. I would suggest to go out of your comfort zone, do something new or embark on an adventure.

Odd_Line4278 · 2024-06-08T15:11:05+00:00

Maybe see a therapist this seems like more than a seduction thing

InstructionAbject763 · 2024-06-10T01:46:56+00:00

Your career isn't a buzz kill

You are

You aren't your career... do you identify with it?

If not figure yourself out outside of your job

Women want men with passion and hobbies

Men who only talk about work (unless it's like rescuing puppies) are the worst kind of men to date

Be a person to a woman, not a worker bee

VisionsOfVisions · 2024-06-08T04:07:43+00:00

You gotta learn to have fun in everything that you do. Children playing with sticks and stones in a third world country have genuine joy and fun. That kind of perspective generates an attractive energy that makes you a great friend and an interesting person to get to know.

bert_cj · 2024-06-08T05:01:59+00:00

Get some hobbies

BadHairDayToday · 2024-06-08T07:12:06+00:00

Yeah life is hard man. It would obviously be good to learn to know yourself, and find a drive for something. I guess most men in your position work on their physique and go on cool vacations, like the obvious South East Asia.

That being said, you don't have to be impressive to get a woman. You can also be a good listener and a kind soul. You might start by asking women how they're really doing.

Good luck my friend. Edit: just wondering, what do you do for a living?

No_Clothes519 · 2024-06-08T04:56:16+00:00

Maybe, maybe not.

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Title	Is this hopeless while you aren’t who you want to be
Author	LizzoBathwater
Upvotes	49
Comments	21
Date	June 8, 2024 2:05 AM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1das1rc/is_this_hopeless_while_you_arent_who_you_want_to/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/is-this-hopeless-while-you-arent-who-you-want-to.1520886 https://theredarchive.com/post/1520886

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