He has anime girls on his wallpaper

Wife_and_Mama · 2024-06-28T16:30:27+00:00

Do our opinions really matter? I can't stand anime. All the artwork looks the same and the blend of innocent and extremely sexualized themes makes me uncomfortable. There seems to be a large overlap of men who watch anime and men who not only consume a lot of porn, but weird porn. Anime was a red flag when I was dating.

That said, my husband has always played video games. He had a handle on this hobby, in regards to both time and finances. It didn't bleed into his attire or decor. Now that we have kids, it's far more accessible a past time than hunting or fishing, so I'm glad he has it. Still, many women consider video games a yellow or red flag.

What we think is irrelevant. Are you comfortable with one day having this decor in your home? If you plan to have children, will you be okay with seeing these overtly sexualized youthful characters? Does it bother you that you've expressed concern and he doesn't seem to care? If you can live with it, it doesn't matter what anyone else thinks. If you can't, don't expect him to change at 41.

allamay5 · 2024-06-28T16:11:49+00:00

At 41 years old, I think you know why this is weird. Leave

Impressive_Dig9730 · 2024-06-28T15:11:35+00:00

no this is DEFINITELY weird…

pieorstrudel5 · 2024-06-28T15:19:41+00:00

I don't mind a man who watches anime, but when it bleeds into his decor or online aesthetic - it just gives me pause. Those anime girls always dress like slutty minors (it's giving pre pubescent at that). It creeps me out.

I also get creeped out by adult women who act like little girls.

But that's just me!

Key_Hunter4064 · 2024-06-29T00:50:05+00:00

Not all anime have over sexualized characters/storyline. there are many that are full of action and fighting. But to have half naked anime girls as wallpapers on almost everything is a red flag. I know guys like this and they are wired as hell.

rep4me · 2024-06-29T21:43:16+00:00

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shockedpikachu123 · 2024-06-28T21:45:04+00:00

I expect that from a man in his teens and early 20s. If he hasn’t grown out of that phase past his 20s, that is definitely odd. At 41 his priorities and hobbies should shift

planejaned · 2024-06-29T13:40:34+00:00

Certain action/sports anime like Solo Leveling, Attack on Titan, Hajime no Ippo are completely fine, especially if there’s zero other questionable ones on his watch list.

But this particular guy… run and possibly request police backup

thekidsarentalright_ · 2024-06-28T15:24:49+00:00

I find it weirder than if they were actual women. It’s even more like a fantasy and there is also anime porn available ‘hentai’ where they look like young girls, uniforms etc which he may watch. Not sure if some men think it’s more acceptable because it’s a cartoon but it’s very young girls with cute young baby voices and it would make me very uncomfortable.

Accomplished-Bet8945 · 2024-06-28T20:10:55+00:00

Weird. Way too weird. I have noticed a correlation between fully grown men who obsess over youthful/ sexy anime characters and a desire for very young teenagers. I wouldn't risk it. Dump him

UnrullyTurbo2000 · 2024-06-28T16:28:27+00:00

Sorry to any mods if this comment coming from an observer might seem out of place.

Look OP, i'm a bloke into anime (and married) as well, and while like in any medium there can be art, your boyfriend is showing too much of his "Power level" (read cringe).

There's nothing wrong if he likes the sexualized side of it. You don't have to like it though.

Appart from this anime imagery that you don't appreciate, is the rest of your interactions healthy, and do you see him as a good partner?
Is your relationship long enought that the love goggles are a bit subdued and you can see each other for what you are?

Anime is totally a hobby (think of it like the harry potter fandom), but at his age, it was more of a weird/outcast type of person hobby.
He might have some attachment from it as it was a company and escape from the troubles of youth. nothing wrong there.
And nothing wrong if you don't like that, and move on.

As for myself, I would prefer if my spouse accepted me as I am, as I'm sure others would prefer that.

Have a honest talk to him, that you don't understand it and see it as vulgar, and that you hope to reach a compromise that pleases both sides.
i'm chuckling as i type this, but uhm... try per example, that while his desktop wallpappers can be kept with the big bazoongas, on his cellphone, to keep pictures of you as a screensaver. you don't want to be embarassed of what people might think of him in any interaction outside where they can catch an eye into his phone.

Or if its a big ick and he doesn't fullfill your relationship ideals, jump the boat, and be honest with him.

IF you decide to stay around with your boyfriend, and might want to give a chance to the art side, ask him to watch Monster with you.
https://myanimelist.net/anime/19/Monster
Its the type of anime aimed at an adult public (with zero sexualization), that's really good,
Better than game of thrones and other high talked shows, that write themselves into mediocracy.
It will make him probably really happy to share that with a partner.

Anyway, I rambled enough.

lightintheforest13 · 2024-06-28T16:28:00+00:00

Yeahh this is definitely a 🚩. Tell him you find this disrespectful and distasteful and ask him to remove these things. If he doesn’t I honestly would question being with him if I were you.

Aneta1993 · 2024-06-29T07:40:16+00:00

I will update you after our conversation today. Probably evening. I also would like to share something that is a big issue but it’s very private but I feel I need to talk it out. Thank you all for the comments I appreciate every opinion🙏

angelicasinensis · 2024-06-29T13:20:55+00:00

I mean,i dont like it, but if you love him then it is what it is.

The_Makster · 2024-06-30T20:34:07+00:00

is there an update on this OP? How did it go last night?

Irish_Phantom · 2024-07-03T18:53:06+00:00

Drop a few hints to him that you don't like it. A dude at 41 with anime as his background wallpaper is quite weird.

FalseConsequence4184 · 2024-06-28T20:30:32+00:00

Man! I want to move to wherever your from love! The guys can really get away with all of it there. I’m sorry Op, keep us posted, this is devastating & depressing as hell to read about…all the best

AutoModerator · 2024-06-28T14:52:43+00:00

Title: He has anime girls on his wallpaper

Author Aneta1993

Full text: Hi

I don’t wanna share too much but I need advice how to speak with my bf ( we plan a future together. I’m 30 and he’s 41)

So he watches a lot of anime and some are very sexualised. He has a wallpaper on his computer and it’s changing every few minutes to a new picture and it’s all photos of anime girls. Some are cute, some are sexy. On his phone background it’s an busty anime girl. On his telegram background a half naked busty anime girl as well. I told him once that it’s vulgar because he also has one figurine of a half naked anime girl on display at his home. He said he views this as Art. Tell me please your opinion. It’s his hobby and should I just accept it or is it weird ? How can I bring this up in terms of me wanting him to change the photos without sounding controlling ?

Sorry for my English I don’t speak it perfectly

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Dionne005 · 2024-06-29T14:30:51+00:00

lol not a guy but I am a total nerd. Back when I lived in my own apartment I had half naked photos of the Jason 5 as my Computers wallpaper. I also had Pokémon in my wall and other anime characters on my bedroom wall. Also collected swords etc and light sabers. It’s not female themed. I’m sure any guy and female friend would think I’m weird but it’s just my space. My husband and I got a real house together and I can’t wait to help our kids decorate like I did while I put all my old apartment stuff in the closet or trash. I’d say as long as he views you appropriately and doesn’t ask you any strange questions sexually or other people etc you should be fine.

4th_times_a_charm_ · 2024-06-30T20:56:13+00:00

Ask him if he is satisfied with your sex life. Don't accept a quick response; really sit down and discuss it. He is right. It's art, but art is subjective; art can be anything. Porn has a sedating effect on men, so it can subdue the beast within us. It's not always this way, but it's better to act out your taboo fantasies in your mind/on a screen than in your neighborhood.

Aneta1993 · 2024-07-09T05:52:17+00:00

Update : I broke up with him

throwaway_69_1994 · 2024-06-29T04:40:42+00:00

It's probably fine. You could always ask him and try to have an honest conversation about it if it bothers you

A LOT of people watch porn. Most have the decency to not make it so public

But if it weirds you out that much, I guess it's true it's not a good fit. But please do be realistic about how many guys you meet will watch porn

I always hate reading that on here. Obviously I get why it bothers you, but so so many people do it. So you either gotta get over it or just stop trying to date, realistically

Also, these subreddits are absolutely full of single people who are bitter about the fact that they're single. They don't have any stake in your happiness or complete aloneness, and their gut reaction is usually gonna be "just break up already"

At least try to talk it out, yeesh

Title	He has anime girls on his wallpaper
Author	Aneta1993
Upvotes	29
Comments	85
Date	June 28, 2024 2:52 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/1dqlicm/he_has_anime_girls_on_his_wallpaper/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/he-has-anime-girls-on-his-wallpaper.1522670 https://theredarchive.com/post/1522670

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