q4w: What does the word loyalty mean to you? And besides yourself and your family, what person(s) have you been loyal to since you've turned 18?

EulenWatcher · 2024-08-13T21:07:41+00:00

A loyal person doesn't betray the trust of their loved ones, they keep their word and they don't leave their loved ones for frivolous reasons. In its core it's about being consistent with your behavior, promises and morals I guess.

Outside of my family I've been loyal to my husband since we started dating (so more than 10 years now) and to my close friends (I've been friends with some for ~15 years now).

saraimarsena · 2024-08-13T20:56:52+00:00

To me, loyalty means showing consistent support, being honest about your actions and intentions, carrying yourself (w your words and your actions) the same way in someone’s presence and in their absence, speaking up on someone’s behalf when appropriate, and remaining faithful.

i’ve been loyal to whoever I was dating at the time. I guess I’m a loyal friend in that I won’t abandon someone for frivolous reasons, but it’s never been tested really like a relationship would. my friendships are pretty easygoing

Financial_Leave4411 · 2024-08-13T21:05:26+00:00

I don’t understand why you jumped to conclusions in your first paragraph. In fact this whole post seems odd but I will still answer your questions and give you the benefit of the doubt.

In general loyalty means I will not purposely screw you over while I am in some sort of personal or professional relationship with you.

I have been loyal to my past and current employers, family members, friends and past boyfriends.

apresonly · 2024-08-13T21:45:56+00:00

that i honor my word w the person.

i have a handful of friends i've had for 20+ years and i don't say things behind their back that I wouldn't want to get back to them -- *even if i knew it would never get back to them*. I have their back even when they are not around.

i dont think loyalty is doing something you don't agree to do, like not going clubbing bc you have a bf unless you agreed and said you wouldn't do it.

but i consider loyalty like putting him above other men. i wouldn't excuse impropriety because it's "technically" okay if in reality i know i am stepping over the line or into territory that I shouldn't. Like, if i have a lil crush on a coworker, going to lunch alone with them or chatting/flirting is "innocent" but I wouldn't do it because that's crossing the line for me. But doing the same thing with someone I had no interest in would be okay.

i've never cheated or been tempted to cheat and i'm happy to be an open book, but its a red flag i wouldn't agree to if he didn't want me to never go dancing (my #1 favorite thing that i rarely do) or make eye contact with other men (a real rule my college roommate was asked to follow from her bf).

So to answer the post appropriately, start with "To me, loyalty means..." And, "I have been loyal to..."

this is weird. you aren't the authority on how to answer posts "appropriately".

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MiddleZealousideal89 · 2024-08-13T21:17:43+00:00

To me, loyalty means sticking by people even if they're not super fun to be around for some period of time. People go through shit, they get sick, they deal with mental health issues, they deal with crappy relationships, sometimes they're trying to figure themselves out and they're a lot to handle. I'd say I've been loyal to my closest friends, been there for them whenever they needed me as much as I could be considering we lived on different continents for a while.

egalitarian-flan · 2024-08-13T21:37:47+00:00

Loyalty means you have steadfast dedication to that person or morals, even in the face of temptation.

I don't have any family, so other than my own morals or various employers, I've been loyal to my boyfriend of 20 years, and my friends as well.

toasterchild · 2024-08-13T23:19:01+00:00

Loyalty is not doing things to hurt the other person even if you drift apart as friends or romantic partners. Most people in my life have been loyal and would never talk crap about me or try to hurt me. I am a very devoted friend an partner and tend to get the same in return. There have been 2 major exceptions my bff who got into drugs and developed some major mental health issues (she is loyal to noone ever) and my ex who got a brain turmor and totally changed as a person.

I don't know why you excluded family, I have found that whole blood is thicker than water thing to be totally BS. Family and work will often fuck a person over faster than anyone else.

januaryphilosopher · 2024-08-13T23:34:23+00:00

Being someone that another person can reasonably expect will support them in any reasonable way across a variety of situations and would not expect would do anything to hurt them or betray their trust (this is all provided they remain loyal to you). You are expected to take their side amd defend them where it doesn't conflict with someone or something else they're loyal to. Apart from my family, I am loyal to a few close friends I have had since I was a young child/teenager. I am not particularly loyal to my extended family members nor to my work.

Planthoe30 · 2024-08-14T04:58:26+00:00

I think the most obvious definition of loyalty would be physical and emotional fidelity. Personally I think it goes deeper. Loyal people don’t entertain options outside of that relationship. They don’t do porn, escort, prostitute or keep friends who are romantically interested in them. Not to say men and women can’t be friends but if evidence arises that suggests one person has feelings or they talk negatively about your spouse I think continuing that friendship is shady.

For example i ended a decade long friendship I had with a guy friend maybe a year ago. He began speaking negatively about my husband. It wasn’t even deserved negativity it felt like he was grasping at straws to be better than my husband. Regardless I saw that the friendship was not good for my marriage, because me continuing that contact would have signaled that it’s ok to trash talk someone I love and it made me uncomfortable. That in combination with commenting on my attractiveness (which he had never done before) just made it seem like the friendship wasn’t healthy for him either.

I also left Snapchat because I began realizing a lot of people used it to cheat, or request nudes for money. Having that temptation around didn’t seem healthy.

With that, I have been loyal to my husband for seven years and counting.

literaryhogwartian · 2024-08-14T12:06:38+00:00

I'm loyal to my ideals. I'm loyal to being a good person. I'm loyal to doing the right thing

MistyMaisel · 2024-08-14T15:31:01+00:00

Loyalty means respect, defending that person (even when I may personally think they're wrong), not talking badly about them in a way I wouldn't say directly to their face or haven't already said to them, not betraying their trust, keeping my word to the best of my ability, not leaving them at the drop of a hat, and clearly within a certain context sexual fidelity.

I've been loyal to my friends of a long time and my boyfriend. Frankly, I'm a pretty loyal person in general, so I've also been loyal to friends I wasn't that close with or around a long time.

Commercial_Tea_8185 · 2024-08-14T20:10:42+00:00

Loyalty means always being by someones side, caring about them, and not doing things to harm them. And besides myself and family im not loyal anyone besides friends.

And if i remove myself and fam, no one has ever been loyal to me lol, which tbh i dont expect and thats why i do it for myself

uglysaladisugly · 2024-08-15T12:38:51+00:00

Loyalty is about being consistent in your interaction with people. To be loyal, you need to be honest on your intentions, you need to reconsider your actions and how they will affect the other person, you need to be honest in the level of sacrifice and or / priorisation you benefit from the other and be willing to return it or stop enjoying it.

I've been loyal to male friends, my boyfriends, my lab partner and female friends.

That__EST · 2024-08-13T21:44:10+00:00

Loyalty means sticking with people even when you're not getting anything out of the relationship or it's lopsided and you're the one putting in more effort. Maybe at one point it was good, or maybe a person just imagined it was good, but it's been an extended period of NOT GOOD.

I'm not loyal. At the first sign of major incompatibility or long stretch of boredom/unhappiness, I am OUT. On the flip side, I am very close to my family, and I have lots of long term friends who have been in my life well over a decade, while also being married and having been friends with my husband for nearly 25 years at this point. I'll never know if any of those people are "loyal" to me though, and I wouldn't have much respect for someone who I treated poorly yet stuck around. Which isn't something I do. My friendships are strong and mean a lot to me and I feel that the feeling is mutual.

And just before someone asks "what if something bad happened or they got sick??!" I don't count that. That's beyond someones control. And I've been there for friends who have gone through bad times. But if someone were to test my loyalty? They would be out of my life quickly.

SaBahRub · 2024-08-13T21:19:02+00:00

Loyalty means sexual fidelity to men, and thus to me

I don’t believe in other definitions.

starksoph · 2024-08-13T21:26:06+00:00

My boyfriend and one of my guy friends that I’ve known since kindergarten

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