Is picking up girls worth it when your aim is to get married and have a nuclear family?

wtknight · 2025-09-24T00:57:53+00:00

Removed. No internal questions (men asking men or women asking women).

TopShelfSnipes · 2025-09-23T23:52:02+00:00

Something a lot of men who claim to date for marriage don't understand:

You have to become her boyfriend before you can become her husband.

So, yes, if you want a wife, you need to learn how to talk to women, to flirt with them, to build attraction (if there is capacity in her specifically to be attracted to you specifically), to embrace sexual tension, to read body language, and to know when and how to appropriately release sexual tension when it exists.

This is true regardless of what your intentions are or what circles you date in, if you date in the West.

Even religious and conservative women who are waiting for marriage to have sex still generally expect to kiss and flirt with their boyfriends, and they require men to become their boyfriends before agreeing to marry them.

Nobody gets the tingles from a Powerpoint presentation about what a loyal husband you'd be.

StopTheIncels · 2025-09-23T23:24:32+00:00

Yes. Even in a healthy relationship, there's seduction. No one teaches seduction like real world experience.

leefjk · 2025-09-23T23:49:39+00:00

You consider yourself a reasonable guy, right? There are reasonable girls out there that exist. You can tell them straight up what you want, and they'll be like "okay yeah cool". Anyone you can't do this with is actually playing you, even if it feels like you're playing them.

AutoModerator · 2025-09-23T21:41:57+00:00

Attention!

You can post off topic/jokes/puns as a comment to this Automoderator message.
For "Debate" and "Question for X" Threads: Parent comments that aren't from the target group will be removed, along with their child replies.
If you want to agree with OP instead of challenging their view or if the question is not targeted at you, post it as an answer to this comment.
OP you can choose your own flair according to these guidelines., just press Flair under your post!

Thanks for your cooperation and enjoy the discussion!

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

harmonica2 · 2025-09-23T23:23:38+00:00

don't you still have to pick up lots to find The One likely?

SeemedGood · 2025-09-24T00:29:14+00:00

Healthy committed LTRs only emerge from relationships in which the woman is so attracted to the man that she is not viewing the relationship transactionally.

To the extent that we (men) are unable to attract women for STRs (ie pickups) we are in very poor shape for entering into LTRs.

Destinyciello · 2025-09-24T00:51:37+00:00

Yes it's critical. Social skills is a must. Having weak social skills puts you at a big disadvantage.

Sure if you're Chad you don't need it. But you're probably not Chad. Average looking men can make massive improvements in their outcomes if they improve social skills. Better looking women. Better relationships. Which ultimately leads to a better marriage.

Also going out to pick up women is a great way to force yourself out of the house. It's about the only thing capable of getting a large % of men to leave the comfort of their home.

Dziksoon · 2025-09-24T00:52:36+00:00

One of the sadder pieces of advice that proved true came from a hotel bartender who told me to take off my ring if I wanted to eat & drink in peace at the bar. Got approached far less often, and the few women who chatted me up accepted "I'm married" with absolute grace.

Some college guys also wear fake weeding ring, they get laid more often, and when girl finding out they are single they are outraged. 😂

Food for thought, and if you want to have more girls interested for you to get laid

Title	Is picking up girls worth it when your aim is to get married and have a nuclear family?
Author	reesespeezes
Upvotes	1
Comments	24
Date	September 23, 2025 9:41 PM UTC (9 months ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/1noubrf/is_picking_up_girls_worth_it_when_your_aim_is_to/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/is-picking-up-girls-worth-it-when-your-aim-is-to.1562646 https://theredarchive.com/post/1562646

Comments