How Do You Flirt and Build Sexual Tension?

spacemangoes · 2025-09-30T23:17:26+00:00

You’ll know when you first see her. Can’t use the same techniques for everyone. Some are more receptive and some are a bit more rigid. But usually, you build comfort by building a rapport and slowly start touching her. Sometimes when talking and the just touching her lightly, guide her by holding her waist etc. after sometime you can touch her hand and then slowly crawl your fingers to her neck. Or something like that but the most important thing is to pull back. Pull back and just lay back. Be nonchalant about it. You gotta have an attitude. No. A belief. No no. You have to get to a point in life where getting her doesn’t make a difference to you emotionally, just like taking a piss. You’ll find results then

Illustrious_Size610 · 2025-09-30T23:36:18+00:00

Your job to start creating the sexual experience is to be direct by expressing what she makes you feel in an emotionally driven way, not to try to get sex (or a relationship or reciprocation or anything else) but rather to invite her to feel the arousal you are feeling for real internally, so that she submerges herself into the emotion and you both just allow each other to sit with the emotion.

And what is the emotion that you express? The way she makes you feel in terms of light-hearted sexual desire (not of love). The emotional effect that her body, her behaviour, her mannerisms have on you. That's what flirting sexually is. Expressing your male sensuality both non-verbally verbally by telling her the things she makes you feel in terms of attraction and sexual desire, for example:

"The way you are trying so hard not to kiss her right now", "the way you lose concentration when she smiles cute like that, the way your heart rate increases when she does "that" particular thing", "the way her gaze kinda hypnotizes you", "the way her touch hits you like a wave", "the way her mannerisms warm up your heart". “The way you feel so drawn to her and can't help it", "the way your mind just short-circuit when you saw her wearing that dress", the way you forgot what you were planning on doing today when you saw how cute she looked", "the way she just took your breath away", "the way you can't help but imagine how you'd like to pin her against the wall and make her yours",...

This is how you flirt verbally, not by telling them compliments or descriptions of what good qualities she has, but by expressing the emotional effect or reaction that her attributes or actions have on you instead, and combining it with the body language and it’s sexual self-expression.

When you flirt sexually, you are expressing the desire she causes you to feel in such a way that invites her to feel that desire, lust and sexual tension that is going through your veins.

Their impulse to start creating sex with you is something they have to feel, and they feel it when you express that desire in such a real and intense way that she imagines your emotions in such vivid detail that she can’t help herself but to feel it as her own. She sees the way you check her body up and down, the way you bite your lips suggestively, the tone of contained lust in your voice, the way your gaze pretty much says to her: “I’d fuck you so hard right now”.

That is what motivates her to feel the sexual energy and can cause her to just want to make out with you on pure raw impulse, and to have sex with you, without you needing to ask her if she would like to have sex and without her evaluating whether she should or not because she is not in her head, she is just feeling it and letting herself be carried by the current of your vibe in that specific moment.

It's something that you say without expecting anything in return, so you should not expect her to tell you “thank you”, or “I feel the same way”, or “you turn me on too”, or "ok let me kiss you"... Just express it because it's just how you feel and only want it to share it right now while you are currently feeling it because the only purpose is inviting them to create a sexual experience if they feel it what you are expressing.

Now she could say whatever she wants: "We barely know each other", "you are so direct, so crazy, so forward", "i have a boyfriend"... Whatever. If she says things like that, you don't say sorry, try to argue, take it back, go defensive, or anything, you simply double down by saying:

"I hear you, I don't want anything, it's just how I feel". While you continue your self-expression verbally and non-verbally.

See? You are not trying to convince her, you are not asking for something, you just keep expressing how you feel internally because that should be your only focus.

This is the secret. Literally. Express feelings without demanding anything in return for sharing your feelings. But if you express feelings expecting her to give you something, then that's pressure and it won't work.

What this does is create sexual tension. And sexual tension is the emotional state where a woman starts to feel aroused, horny, etc because she is feeling your arousal and horniness, which is contagious.

I wrote this book that goes more in depth into this if you are interested.

PrinceDestin · 2025-10-01T03:27:07+00:00

Don’t think about it, get her talking about herself, and ask engaging questions about what she says to have a damn near infinite pool of conversation information,

When you guys are going strong for a while you can spice it up asking a sexual question, one that’s in good taste doesn’t have to be explicit, my go to is

“Is sex important to you in a relationship or if it’s trash you don’t care”

Or what are your non sexual turn ons Then ask for the sexual ones

Flirting is like a tango dance, the man leads but allows the woman to express herself until it’s time for the man to guide again

That’s you asking a question that leads you closer in the direction you want, say things with a purpose

And have a fun debate type of energy,

If you say something she’s not very receptive to go another route and then revisit it saying it another way once the conversation time has gotten better and then you just might get a better reaction that works in your favor.

Call her bluff, hell purposely put your self in an lightheartedly embarrassing instance to where she can prove you wrong

Any tactic could work but the common denominator would be being authentic and interested in the woman

As if you were infatuated with her character

Then you get to the good stuff

How I escalate if you want to get a step one I usually skip this step or don’t count is a step

Get a hug, and wear a good cologne

You broke a touch barrier but more importantly you smelled great

There’s so many ways you could spin it

Anyway kiss her, you can kiss her neck which works better, that’s my number one escalation move,

You can spam the neck kisses but mix it up and work your way down

Doesn’t have to be in one sitting, you can spread throughout the date, pay attention to the reception

But by the time you get comfortable to make that move you set the ground work

GUYS PLEASE BEFORE YOU TAKE A GIRL ON A DATE

TALK TO HER A LOT ON FACETIME FIRST

MAKE SURE SHES WHO SHE IS,MAKE SURE YOU ESTABLISH A GOOD CONNECTION FIRST TO WHERE SHE IS EXCITED TO SEE YOU JUST OFF OF YOU GETTING TO KNOW HER

TRY TO GET AGREEMENT FROM HER THAT YOU GUYS ARE GONNA KISS AND SMASH

meaning flirt on the phone, if she’s receptive to sexual topics and you inserting yourself with hypothetical situations with her, or better yet,

Just outright declare the things you guys are gonna do

See her reaction

This has gotten me to mainly always end up smashing first link because I didn’t feel like had to get to know the girl all over again, the date will be the extension of the quality time you’ve talked to her on the phone

You could just show up on a date hug her and kiss her like she’s your girlfriend already first link

(Maybe not the safest option) but I’ve seen the benefits

United-Implement-382 · 2025-09-30T23:57:58+00:00

Damn Thank You For This!!!! You really broke it down to a T. So basically when you flirt with words, you want to express to her how she makes you feel. You basically include yourself in the compliment that you give her. You should mix it up sexually and non sexually. I think I get it. You really just opened up my mind!!

Jimbobbly123 · 2025-09-30T23:17:25+00:00

Ahhh man this is something that is strange to explain when said out loud because by nature flirting is natural, situational and instinctive.

Generally, pin pointing their personal interests and then showing interest while also teasing (some playful push and pull) is a good move.

I complimented a woman's back tattoo even though I didnt know what it meant and went down a whole flirtatious rabbit hole about astrology (lol plenty to tease about)

Be ok with silences and maintain warm eye contact during those silences

JackSquirts · 2025-09-30T23:22:22+00:00

Read the "should I tell her" post on my profile - it goes into to flirting in a bit of detail.

FriendlyWrenChilling · 2025-10-01T11:51:46+00:00

Flirting is creating a wide variety of emotions that spikes up and down. Think "how tonmake someone laugh/interested/engaged" and so on is a good way to start.

Tension is when the listener expects something but you have yet to do the thing. So when girls expect you to kiss them but you take it really sloooooow.

You can read all my articles under "verbal skills", you will find much help in that regard. My instagram also have some nice illustration of how flirting works to build attraction.

Life-Income2986 · 2025-09-30T23:46:45+00:00

People here seem to think communication is a series of magic spells to extract your wants and needs from others without becoming a social pariah instead of something you do WITH others. Flirting AT people does not work and never will.

IGotUrBrain · 2025-09-30T23:37:31+00:00

Sexual tension is fueled by passionate kissing, Period!!! .. so it’s not about what you say its about how good of a kisser you are because thats the part that usually sets it off!

NaturalSelectionNine · 2025-10-01T07:37:48+00:00

Calibration. You learn to calibrate well when you’re present. You learn to be present with the girl when you’re consistently cold approaching girls enough that you’ve forced & now built your mind to be present. So once its present it knows exactly when to.

Show intent, tease, pull back, neg, escalate verbally, logistically & physically to make things work.

forever420oz · 2025-10-02T06:46:48+00:00

just “be yourself” and make yourself comfortable around the girl

Prestigious_Water336 · 2025-09-30T23:29:03+00:00

Tease her by saying "no way" "come on" "I don't believe you"

Get closer to her

Make good eye contact

Title	How Do You Flirt and Build Sexual Tension?
Author	United-Implement-382
Upvotes	151
Comments	28
Date	September 30, 2025 11:09 PM UTC (9 months ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1nus8s6/how_do_you_flirt_and_build_sexual_tension/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/how-do-you-flirt-and-build-sexual-tension.1563171 https://theredarchive.com/post/1563171

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