First of all, thanks to everybody in here who has been putting up with my goofy newb questions. This is a very unique community and I wasn't expecting so much dedication and attention from the mods and power users. Anyway, I was told to quit being philosophical and do some field reports so here we go.

My advice to other beginners to is ACTUALLY BUY ONE OF THE BOOKS and READ IT. Everything in the main threads may be confusing or offputting to an outsider. I have been listening to audiobooks of MMSP and NMMNG (much of this is exactly me) and checking out The Beige Phillip Show podcast. I honestly don't have time to read books but I do have lots of listening time.

My main problem is sex frequency. I'm usually trying to initiate around 11pm which is when I get crazy wood and have to hear "honeyyyyy I'm too tired..." and then I try to pretend its no big deal or beat myself off like a shamed addict. I downloaded a period calendar app and have been tracking my wife's ovulations and marking when we have sex for the past couple months. Extremely helpful. I also realized that we are only fucking on the weekend (which means 1-2 times per week!) and it's usually in the middle of the day. So maybe she is actually tired at night. We talked about it and we're going to try to have some evening romance after dinner. I foresee this as a problem because there's usually other shit going on that early. We'll see how it goes. In any case, I know I need to work on my FRAME and my GAME so that I'm not the only one who is hungry.

I knew shit tests were a problem but I didn't realize how often this was happening. She is the queen of shit tests. Arbitrary chores, nonsense questions, fake worries. The more I awake to this, the more I see. Just yesterday, she was trying to throw something away in the kitchen and asked me to open the trash can lid. (We have the kind where you just step on a pedal to open the lid so you don't even have to touch anything!) "Are you serious? You're standing right next to it, just move your foot a couple inches!" This is just one example but now, instead of getting frustrated at her or thinking she's lazy, I just sincerely laugh out loud and it gets funnier the angrier she gets. Old-me would NEVER have done this! Later she was next to me on the couch and sort of whimpered "I'm sorry I was mad earlier" and I played it cool but inside I was thinking "WTF! She just fucking APOLOGIZED to me after I laughed at her for being mad! Those misogynist shits in MRP are geniuses!"

So I know this is all small stuff so far but feels like a major turn in the right direction for me.