After being humbled by Rian and a couple other contributors a couple months ago about being a validation whore plus never using OYS, I genuinely don't deserve any help or advice because I haven't added any but I'm stuck on my path and need some wisdom from some guys that have been where I am.
My frame, is not consistent atall! it's just all over the place, basically what I feel like on that given moment. I have some examples. I try to have a good positive frame always but sometimes my feelings get in the way and my mind takes over and my body reacts!
Yesterday I had a good time with my LTR (pre red pill). everything was smooth I had a good positive frame and shit tests and compliance tests where just ignored or pressure flipped. I had some activities planned where we went to build a wigwham if I spelt that right. all went well I had a good productive day learning some new shit and getting down and dirty which is always fun!!
She had spent the night at her mum's house and went to work from there (we work with eachother.... I know, I fucking well know!!!!!!).. She gets home and I've made some dinner (I'm a chef) no big deal I love to cook, We eat she washes up. except this time I'm silent I don't feel like talking much or engaging in any lengthy conversation, I'm just silent and as she said "blunt". I ignore any shit test attempt, and don't feel like doing a fucking thing....
That night we go to bed and start messing around. She's giving some monster head, and I have what I call the kink mirror so I can see all the good bits while she's doing it. So I'm turned on as fuck and tell her that her butt looks good and I want to fuck it, she tells me that it's "all I want to do lately". I don't say a fucking thing as I'm still with my nuts in her mouth I then reposition so I can get to it and she smacks me away.... Bam!!! I'm instantly limp and all the blood rushes from my little head to my big head, she turns and asks "something wrong" I tell her "no", get under her and finish her by eating her out. She then says "get the lube and fuck me or just use your own". I jump straight out of bed, put a towel round me and go to shower and brush my teeth. When I get back she's pouting on the bed and says "why did you do that" I ask "what" with a dumb stupid fucking look on my face, she said "you never just jump out of bed" I asked if it was because I didn't hug her and she said "yeah" I told her I wasn't thinking, and watch my show on t.v..
I just need to know why I'm in my feelings so much and my mood can change rapidly from 1 day to the next. I'm trying my fucking hardest to get away from the fucking validation trap, to the point where I've deleted all social media. But being my own man and judge it seems that I'm judgeing myself through my feelings and not through something worthwhile. I have oldschool morals and values but they get you nowhere with women because none of them abide by any kind of moral or value (except your value) so I'm just going off my mood. I know you guys don't like giving the answers because you know it takes away from the hard work that you all put in but am I right in this? Are all your frames based on what you feel like then (like women) or do you guys follow a code of conduct...