Need serious advice about a plate

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September 24, 2018

First time autistic faggot posting, here.

Ben swallowing the red pill for about 9 months. I'm not there yet.
Seeing good progress in myself, my frame, and in the bedroom. Wife gets the tingles more often. She is more in my frame now than she's ever been, before or after marriage.

Spun the wrong plate and took it farther than I should of. too far. Inadequate/insufficient vetting on my part, and fucking idiotic of me. Now this crazy bitch is threatening to go straight to my wife and fuck up all of my/our progress, and take me down with her as she self-destructs on her nosedive toward her own rock-bottom, all cause some twisted sense of her own religious self-righteousness.

I know I need to beat her to the punch, but how do I frame this to my wife without cowering like a fucking dog with my tail between my legs? How do I do damage control?

I realy am looking for real advice. Thanks in advance.

Post Information
Title Need serious advice about a plate
Author throwawaywithstyle5
Upvotes 10
Comments 35
Date 24 September 2018 04:57 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit askMRP
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tinglesframeplatethe red pill

[–]PersaeusRed Beret13 points14 points  (8 children) | Copy

whether your wife hears it from you or your sloot makes no difference, so

most threats are hollow, call her bluff. most likely nothing happens.

if she does rat you out; you got two basic options:

  • deny, deny, deny and take it to your grave. no advisable if your sloot has evidence.

  • own it, don't apologize; and tell your wife to do better or GTFO. see this post for an example

[–]tmh88mrp1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

Is there anything else owning it should entail? Because the moment he does that, she'll up her guard and scrutinise, get pissed, shit test etc etc... Any advice on how a man should deal with what comes next with owning it?

[–]mindfulbutgutlessRed Beret2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

she'll up her guard and scrutinise, get pissed, shit test etc etc..

that all depends on his level of NGAF and SMV. It will happen, just for how long is what changes.

[–]PersaeusRed Beret2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

i'll be posting the one year update to that post soon. you'll just have to wait.

[–]BostonBrakeJob0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Fuck dude, that linked post was exactly what I needed to read right now.

[–]djxput8 points9 points  (3 children) | Copy

While I don't envy the OPs predicament, ty for bringing this up. Moral of the story don't spin a plate if you can't handle what may occur.

As other people said you have to own it.

[–]this_weeks_account21 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

....and you need to understand the many, many signs that this was likely to happen that OP likely missed long before it got to this.

When I used to spin, every single plate knew my situation before I got even relatively deep.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

When I used to spin, every single plate knew my situation before I got even relatively deep.

How did you bring that up without it being weird?

[–]this_weeks_account20 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Great question:

The thing is, plates are NOT and should NOT be valuable to you so you should literally not care if she “comes or goes” (see what I did there?)

I got the plate interested and ready to bang, then I’d drop that I was already in a relationship, this would lead them to either

  1. Be into it, knowing about it and the secrecy rules that would need to be followed or
  2. Not be into it, at which point you bail and she has nothing on you but a chat that could be interpreted in many different ways.

The key is to SMELL OUT the fuckin’ crazy ones. The crazy ones are always insane in bed, but they are NOT good to keep long term and especially if you have a girl at home. Have an escape plan and good luck!

[–]JudgeDoom694 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

Go to your wife with a story about how the plate came on to you, and you (of course) flatly rejected her.

When the plate outs you, she'll come across as a crazy spurned woman who is telling lies. And you're the dutiful husband who stood by his wife despite the advances of this evil temptress.

If you play it right, your SMV will go up in the eyes of your wife because it will validate your desirability.

[–]MrPurplePoison2 points3 points  (6 children) | Copy

My immediate advice would be to go completely no contact with the crazy. She is using threats and fear to control you and it is working. You are playing her game and she will always win.

There is no damage control here, there is just how you handle it. If you are higher value to your wife than any of her other prospects she will probably stick around. If you are not you may want to beg forgiveness and work on improving yourself, step up and take the lumps.

If you do tell your wife, please be adult enough to come 100% clean, don't hide crap, and don't do damage control. That crap is torture.

Get a full panel STI test, get your wife tested.

[–]mindfulbutgutlessRed Beret0 points1 point  (9 children) | Copy

Own it.

but how do I frame this to my wife without cowering like a fucking dog with my tail between my legs?

Being upfront and apologetically honest. Why did you decide to spin a plate in the first place?

How do I do damage control?

My guess would be by getting out in front of it. Or you could have the crazy bitch do it for you and play defense...Deny deny deny

[–]CalvinRichland0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Why did it get to this point

[–]FlyingSexistPig0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

You cheated on your wife.

You didn't step through the 12 levels of dread. You didn't lead, you just did what you wanted to do. Now you're wondering how you talk your way out of it, just like all the cheating women do.

[–]TheUnReasonableMan440 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Here's my advice... Ignore the plate.

She is crazy. If she goes to the wife... who cares. You did it. Own it. Then use it as a chance to let the wife know that you love her but are interested in sex with other people. If thats a deal breaker for her then either walk away, limit yourself, or be better at doing it discretely.

I'm firm believer in owning shit. You're a man and one of the defining factors of that is being an honest person. I don't personally feel like that means I have to disclose everything I do to my wife, but I do think that it means I don't lie about or deny it either if confronted/asked directly.

(Source: Have spun plates behind the wives back. Currently have a ONS that has befriended my wife. Am I worried? Nah. The wife understands that predators have to hunt. Also, most chics have zero desire to out themselves as sluts, esp. to other women that will judge them.)

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Are you prepared for when she tells you one night, in the not too distant future, that she went out and got her some action on the side too?

[–]tmh88mrp0 points1 point  (5 children) | Copy


[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

"I fucked up and I am sorry. I know how hurt you must be and understand if you want to leave me."

Done. Broken record if she keeps bringing it up. Beyond that, there isn't much else to say.

If she asks you "why" just pressure flip "is there any excuse for my fuck up that would justify my actions?"

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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