32, 180lbs, 6’00”, about 15% body fat. Lifting 2 out of every 3 days, and starting to see results. Good job, have a lot of money, we own a house, and I’m pretty good looking regarding face/hair. When I was single, I was good at running game and using the techniques on the red pill and I am a little bit rusty but getting back into it. Married 3 years, together 6, no kids.

Currently have read the rationale male, bang, half the side bar and most of nmmng. Been reading mrp for about a month now. My problem like most men here is lack of sex, as my bed room deteriorated from daily to once a week, to once every 2-3 weeks to complete ‘no’ and going to 6 weeks.

I’ve come to the conclusion that I have been a poor captain, as my frame has been weak (living in her frame) and venting all my problems to her/flooding. On top of that, I have been argumentative, loud, aggressive, my way or the highway... overall just very beta behaviors. Rollo’s book hit me like a ton of bricks, as he explained how unattractive I have become. Going forward these last couple weeks, I have been working through the nmmng exercises, working on shit tests/stfu/idgaf mentalities and learning why sex is important to me besides busting a nut. Basically I am looking for validation from her with sex and affection, when I should be working on self validation and improvement.

I haven’t initiated in a week because I have been really busy on myself, plus I’m tired of getting turned down. The last time we had sex, she said she really didn’t like it which some might take as it was lousy, I think this was just super turned off because my beta-ness had hit its limit. I guess the opposite of turned on, she was turned negative. When I asked (I need to stop asking for sex and work on other methods like kino) for sex since then, she would bring up this time we had sex as a reason for her hard no. Her biggest issue, in her mind, is that she holds grudges and doesn’t let things go and this is one of them. I think she holds on to grudges more so with me than other people, probably another shit test. Out of the 1000s of times I have pounded her, this is what she brings up and can’t put it in the past.

I’d like to bring this up with her that she needs to drop this and this is an instance of her holding on to something that is harmful to the relationship. I don’t think she has the ability to self reflect (all women for that matter) so she doesn’t see what she is doing. I know that by bringing this up it’s not going to fix the bigger problem: me not being a good captain. Thoughts?