I've been lurking for about a year, started my MAP about 10 months ago. My issue is not a DB or sexually related. My issue is that I was/am a drunk captain type 2. WISNIFG has become my go to and I've implemented fogging, negative assertion/inquiry which have helped me live my mission without being derailed by her feelings. My concern is I'm about 10 months in to correcting course (married 5 years) and things are getting worse. I've have not had a nuclear level shit test but she continues to try and control me via negative emotions. Now that she's unable to control me she swings from hostile to passive aggressive. In her mind I'm still responsible for everything, every outcome.
I came home from work to find her screaming at my son (3 years old) cause he would not eat his dinner. Immediately she calls on me to get him to start eating. I refuse to parent via scream until compliance, so I tell her I'll handle it and then I get him to eat, but I do it my way. Well because I disagreed with her, she storms off to pout in the bedroom for the rest of the night. Okay no fucks given. My son finishes his dinner. I make dinner for the rest of the family. Give my son a bath, put him to bed and go for a run.
I remained pretty much emotionless through the event, didn't say much of anything. Maybe I failed in some way. Thing is, this type of stuff goes on everyday. I'm getting tired of her shit and resetting every morning is becoming a challenge. She continues to bitch at me for everything. Last night she was angry because my daughters (6 months) sock fell off when I put her to bed, a fucking sock. I laughed at her and left to go workout. Obviously it's not about the sock but she uses every action/event to create conflict. Ultimately it's hard for me to say she contributes much value, I feel like it would not be that hard to move forward without her.
So my question is to the guys out there who are or understand the type 2 dynamic. Where am I fucking up? How long did it take you to see some results? Should I keep going or is divorce my only option here?
200 lbs, 6ft 12%BF
Lifts: 270 Bench, 355 Squat, 405 Deadlift
In the past 10 months I've:
Got a huge promotion at work.
Went from 17% BF to 12% BF
Got tested for hormone imbalance (normal)
Went to see a therapist about my codependency issues.
Started gaming and now practice catch and release
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