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Finding motivation at work

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February 3, 2016

I've been having a rough time at work recently and it's been affecting my life and my ability to maintain frame in my relationship. It's nothing special, just getting bummed out by life shit and work crap. My original solution to this was to put a picture of my gf up in my office to use as motivation and keep me going through the shitty times. This worked at first as it kept me going through hard times but I soon realized it was causing me to focus too much on her as my motivation and putting her up on a pedalstool. I became more beta at home and it just wasn't working out. I still have her picture up but I need something else to draw some positive vibes from when work's got me down.

My question to you guys is what do you do to stay motivated and not get bummed out when shit piles up? I have a sparsely decorated office (a map & a pic of my gf) but I would like some other things to hang up or look at when my mind starts racing and putting me in a negative headspace. Also, are there any strategies or tips that you may have to find motivation from within? Any good quotes I can print out and hang in the wall? It seems like whenever I'm getting overwhelmed I think of my girl and how I don't want to let her down, but that makes me weaker in the relationship and less stoic and oakish overall. All of my coworkers (mostly female) have pictures of their kids hanging up but I don't have kids. I'm somewhat new to this 9-5 office life as all my prior jobs were exciting, active and different everyday.

I'm just looking for sources of motivation beyond my gf to keep me going. Something visual I can tack up would be even better. Any advice or feedback will be appreciated. If i'm just being a giant pussy please let me know that as well. Thanks.

Post Information
Title Finding motivation at work
Author cholomite
Upvotes 6
Comments 26
Date 03 February 2016 05:29 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit askMRP
Original Link
Similar Posts

Red Pill terms found in post:
MAPbetaframethe wall

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (3 children) | Copy

ok Giant freaking pussy. But thats ok.

Here is what I did to keep me motivated when I was put in a situation where everything I did at work was wrong, and I had to prove myself to someone who doesn't know what they are talking about / is a new boss :

Set daily, two hour and if you need to hourly, goals to achieve at your desk / job

If your workplace situation allows for it, get up every hour and do something physical. Knock out 50 pushups or or do two minute max pushups. Get your blood going. Focus solely on the push-up / physical activity.

This will help much more than you realize.

Looking at something else external is distracting as fuck, and you start having your mind wonder about it (like you are pedestalizing your gf))

So find a way to have internal motivation. If your job sucks so much you want to get another one, focus on that.

Set a goal. Meet it. Set another goal, Meet that. Keep going.

Done .

Edit : ok I read some of your answers to other people.

You fucked up. Why are you at a job that is so easy you are bored, and then get frustrated when you are given more work, because you look bored.

Two solutions / options - if you cant take it any more, buck for a promotion or get a job that actually uses your potential. This doesn't have to be another place of employment, this can be a side business. If you are being underutilized, find a way to a job with more responsibility , in your company, or at another. Always work at the top of your comfort level.

The other option is to look at your job as some bullshit you do to pay the bills, and have something else you work at while sitting on your desk pretending to be busy.

Either way, man up and create opportunity for growth.

[–]cholomiteMod / BP Downvote Magnet[S] 1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

I got into my line of work when I was bluepill as fuck because it was stable and would allow me to be a great beta bux. Now I can't stand it which is why I'm always looking for motivation or reasons to keep going with it. I've been looking for other opportunities but my degree only allows for so many different career paths. You are right though, I need to man up and create more opportunities for growth, probably outside of my current profession with a money making hobby or side business. Thanks for the feedback.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

I'm paying attention to this thread because I'm in the same boat you are. Beta career, limiting degree. Looking for options. Trying to own my shit and not keep going along like it's not my fault I'm in this position.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

you are welcome.


"Now I can't stand it which is why I'm always looking for motivation or reasons to keep going with it."

Why are you looking for reasons to do something you do not want to do??

I understand it's easier to follow the path of Inertia, but this is kind of like starting lifting for a fat man. Just start one day.

good luck

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (5 children) | Copy

My original solution to this was to put a picture of my gf up in my office

Teenage romance movie stuff?

My question to you guys is what do you do to stay motivated and not get bummed out when shit piles up?

I focus on what I can do at work to get me closer to my end goal. If you have a lot of computer time you can start taking classes, writing, blogging, etc. I write a lot of my posts and do my school work in between actual work.

When shit piles up, I'll watch a tutorial on certain lifts or whatever to educate me further on fitness and I'll see the photos and videos f shredded dudes to remind me that I still have a ways to go which keeps me from getting complacent.

I don't want to let her down

You need to learn to do things for yourself. If you hate your job or it is difficult, find a way to be a better worker or find another job. not for your girl, for YOU.

My advice, remove your photos & fuck any quotes then put up a single photo of your goal.

You need to mature and harness your masculinity. Your girl is a girl, she's not your mission and if you keep this mindset you will lose her or yourself - I guarantee it.

What is your goal in this life, or at least right now, what is it you want?

[–]cholomiteMod / BP Downvote Magnet[S] 1 point2 points  (4 children) | Copy

As Rollo put it, I am the true romantic in the relationship. You're right about the picture, I gotta take that shit down. It will never be anything more than a bullshit romantic gesture that slows me down.

Honestly, I don't really know what I want. I've been busting my ass the past year and a half. I'm in great shape, recently got promoted, get more sex and BJ's than I could ever have imagined, tons of new friends. My ultimate goal is to start a family, but it will be a few more years before I take that step. That's probably where this whole "do it for her" mindset comes in. I know she's interchangeable with any other girl, but the only thing I have to work towards, long term is building a foundation to start a family. Maybe I just need to do a mental readjustment into focusing on this stuff independently, without her in the picture at all.

I guess I'll try to develop some new short term goals in the meantime. There's always room to get more shredded. I wonder what my coworkers would think if I hung up a picture of a buff shirtless dude on my wall.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy

As Men we are all the more romantic in our relationships as men are the more romantic of the sexes. It's ok, just so long as you own the romanticism and you do not allow it to delude you to believing your woman thinks the same way.

The relationship you create, environment you foster, and woman you lead should be a part of the mission. They should not be the mission itself. Keep her in the picture, but remove her from being the 'target'.

I wonder what my coworkers would think if I hung up a picture of a buff shirtless dude on my wall.

I no shit had this conversation a few hours ago as I was looking through a few bodybuilding/male fitness photos and the cougar I work with asked why I was looking at half naked dudes. First, I corrected her saying they were half dressed, and second, I was analyzing their bodies and comparing to my own. Still, I felt gay so I wouldn't recommend you doing that.

On a more serious note: Right now, try to come up with something you want to do.

Personally, I want to write a book, learn ASL, find a new job, and get my master's degree. I align my choices with those goals in mind and utilize my time to get me closer to those goals.

What is it that you want, short or long term?

[–]cholomiteMod / BP Downvote Magnet[S] 0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

Longterm I want a family, short term I could use some more money, or at least compensation based on my efforts. I would love to turn a hobby into a profitable past time but most of my hobbies are worthless blue pill time sinks.

A good short term goal might be to develop a hobby initially that I could later use to supplement my income.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

That's a start dude, I don't know what you're interested in but at least you've planted the seed.

[–]cholomiteMod / BP Downvote Magnet[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Yea, I'll have to explore some stuff. I think the bottom line here is that I got into this profession when I was blue pill as fuck, thinking that a stable boring job would give me all kinds of love and affection from my woman for being so providing and predictable. Now I know I could be just as happy living in a shack in the woods banging hiker's wives.

I think it's just some beta hamstering trying to rationalize why the fuck I'm still here because I don't have many opportunities that I can jump to just yet.

Either way, this post and the feedback I got really helped me flesh out some ideas and clear my head. Thanks man.

[–]Trekneck2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

I'll recommend to you the same thing I do to everyone else. Read the book Lynchpin by Seth Godin. Then, watch Jiro Dreams of Sushi on netflix. Sure, it's a documentary on a sushi chef, but you will never hear a better story of someone dedicating their entire life to their craft.

If what you're doing with your life brings you no value, then your work will suffer, because you have no passion for your craft. No amount of fluffy plants and motivational "you can do it" bullshit cat pictures are going to make you a better worker.

Then, suck it the fuck up and make yourself the best you can be. If you can't do that at your current job, find another line of work that gets you going everyday.

[–]IASGame1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Discipline is better than motivation, and certainly more reliable.

Instead of thinking of not letting your gf down, think about not letting yourself down!

You can try having small "toys" like a stress ball or stuff like that to manipulate when you are stressed.

You can also try to chat up some of the women, but that probably has some risks.

[–]cholomiteMod / BP Downvote Magnet[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I flip pens in between my fingers like a maniac usually, but maybe a stress ball would be more effective. You have a point about not letting myself down. I need to develop some long term personal goals for me to think about.

The women I work with constantly chat me up and talk shit about their husbands, who are off at their own jobs busting their asses for wives that talk shit about them all day to me. Maybe that's part of it too. Either way, I'm not gonna shit where I eat.

[–]SexistFlyingPig1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

You're having girl problems? I feel bad for you, son. I got 99 problems but being a bitch ain't one.

It sound like you need a different line of work. Trying to get through the work day so that you don't "let your gf down" is the worst possible motivation. You're trying to anchor your ship to a wave that moves with the tide.

You have to find an anchor in yourself. I lift so that I like how I look and feel more confident. It's has the ancillary benefit of my gf being more attracted to me, but that's not why I do it.

[–]tim_rp1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

I can empathise with this. Read the recent post about victim mentality and think about whether it applies to your situation. What I see here is a lack of mission, which is something I struggle with too. Here's what I'm doing.

To give you a bit of context, I lost a good job a couple of years ago. Not fired or anything; just one of those things. What followed was 15 heartbreaking months of unemployment. 500 job applications; 80 interviews; zero offers. My wife - kids in tow - moved back to her parents' place and I couch surfed in a city with better job prospects.

Six months ago I finally landed a part time job. Big step down, minimal development prospects, a third of the money I was on before. I had a mission; I failed miserably; my wife lost a tonne of respect for me; and I still feel like a failure.

Recently, I've realised that a mission and victimhood are two sides of a binary system. I failed at my mission and became a victim. Therefore the ONLY way out of that is to define a new mission.

For me, there's two things I'm doing right now. I've recently gotten back onto the job-hunting train, with a goal of returning to full time, better paid work. I've resolved to be more Red Pill in my approach by putting in less effort and Giving Less Fucks since being enthusiastic was such a failure last time.

The other side to that coin is the resolution to absolutely kill it in my current job while I'm still there. It's a role that would usually be done by someone in the mid-20's, so I need to do it like the late-30 year old that I am, leveraging the wisdom and confidence I've built over the years. So far, I have a few small wins under my belt.

TL;DR: Get a mission or be a victim. Up to you.

[–]cholomiteMod / BP Downvote Magnet[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Your story and your outlook really resonated with me. Thanks man.

[–]grncld0 points1 point  (4 children) | Copy

1 - Yes, you're being a giant pussy.

2 - Motivation is bullshit, what you need is discipline. That doesn't come from staring at some wordfart or daydream porn stuck on a wall.

You don't give much detail to go on but whatever it is you do, set goals and smash them. Be the most productive fucker in the place and work your way up if you want to stay. If you don't like it look for another job and use your achievements in a much improved resumee.

[–]cholomiteMod / BP Downvote Magnet[S] 0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy

I have plenty of discipline, I can easily set goals and achieve them. My problem is that when I finish the 5 projects I've been assigned and my boss slams 10 more down on my desk I start to question why I'm doing this all and my mind floats towards thinking of my gf to find peace with it all.

I think you're right about the new job and I'm actively looking, but in the meantime I guess I just gotta STFU and do work.

[–]SexistFlyingPig0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

You sound clinically depressed. You should probably seek out a therapist.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Fuck man

You should own this. When you complete 10 look at him and say "call me when you got something harder" then look around thinking "i can do your job and your job and your job"

Men find peace from within. It's a total zen thing..or stoicism...whatever your flavor.

Read Mastery by Robert Greene. You should be finding peace in the details and in executing a well crafted plan.

[–]cholomiteMod / BP Downvote Magnet[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Thanks. I'll check that book out.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I don't know what kind of work you do, but if it is knowledge-based work, read Deep Work (by Cal Newport). He provides a number of strategies to stay focused on work and avoid distraction.

For motivation, print out inspirational and motivational quotes in large fonts and post them on a bulletin board in front of you, or where you can look at it easily.

[–]Zeusjames0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Hang up a picture of yourself and think about how you don't want to let yourself down. You shouldn't be doing anything for anyone else's happiness.

Live in your frame. Your happiness.

Motivation fades, always. Develop discipline.

[–]rocknrollchuck0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Motto for the wall: Acta non verba. Got this posted at my desk, and it always reminds me to be the guy that GETS IT DONE, no matter what - and to do it without complaining. Great inspirational quote!

[–]cholomiteMod / BP Downvote Magnet[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Holy fuck I don't know why I didn't think of this myself. Thanks man.

[–]midlifedick0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I've struggled with motivation my entire life. At some points, my only motivation was to not be bored. As I've moved through stages of my life, read widely and voraciously, and observed successful people up close and personal, I can say this with confidence: If you are interested in learning and in people, combined with willing to do what others won't, you will never be bored and you will be successful beyond your imagination. Degrees are not limiting! Once you are out of school, the ability to learn and apply and work with others is pretty much the only determinant of success and if you are doing that all day every day, there is no boredom. It doesn't matter what it is, from shoveling disgusting things to leading large corporate teams, people that are successful have these things in common: willing to do what others wont, constantly learning and appying, works well with others.

Concentrate on learning, working hard, forming relationships with others and there will be doors opening that you did not even know existed.

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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