How to make your man feel good in front of other guys/what NOT to do?

Strixt · 2019-03-13T17:40:06+00:00

My best friend and I constantly make gay jokes about each other. One time my friend got me so good my wife started snorting. I of course called her a traitor and said I see how it is. Y’all going to gang up on me. But never once did I have such little self confidence and low self esteem I assumed she likes him in a sexual manner. Because of that? No.

The wife still hugged me. Held my hand. Laid on my chest. Did everything physically to show she is in to me and no one else. Physical attachment speaks louder then words.

I personally want my wife thinking my friend is cool because he is and I want him over when ever I want. And she doesn’t mind me basically playing video games with him online all the time.

If your man knows his friend is a alpha widower and has a history of doing his friends girls. He should leave his friend and warn you. So that is on him.

Fatpandasneezes · 2019-03-13T17:21:37+00:00

I always try to "serve" my guy in front of his friends, more so than I even would on a normal day. Make his coffee, bring his things, just wait on him hand and foot. I always agree with him as well, or defer to him if anything comes up. We can always chat afterwards if it's REALLY necessary.

My man loves it, and I've seen the envy in his friend's eyes. They've even commented on it, asking their own SO's why they never do that. (hint: it's because their SO is a self-proclaimed 'feminist').

rpmc83 · 2019-03-13T20:18:47+00:00

I'd be willing to bet the guys were taking light jabs at each other, as men often do and the other guy thought he could get a better shot in by getting the girlfriend to side with him rather than her boyfriend, and it worked. She was oblivious to the male pecking going on and so her response, though honest, hurt her boyfriend as he likely presumed she understood what was truly going on. She validated the other guy, and that hurts coming from your intimate partner. An unfortunate circumstance and misunderstanding.

missiesmithy · 2019-03-13T15:08:15+00:00

Men and women have very different cultures. In man culture, this makes perfect sense.

ryonna · 2019-03-13T17:40:42+00:00

Let's use a different analogy here, say you're a brunette and one of your friends is a blonde, someone asks your boyfriend about his preferences (blonde vs. brunette) and he (whether consciously or not) replies with blonde in front of your friends. Now, this is a small thing (similar to the car conversation) and it might not affect you, but many women would feel insecure about their boyfriend's preferences in that situation and may suspect that his attraction is directed towards someone else (blonde friend).

It's small on your part but your boyfriend also needs to work on himself. Does he have any issues with self-confidence? Do you always make him feel good and compliment him? I think the main reason he asked that question out of jealousy might be because he doesn't feel secure enough in the relationship or he has some mild issues with being content with himself.

Laughing at people's funny jokes and smiling at others is normal, it's polite and friendly. Smiling too big at or laughing a lot around a specific man frequently is where the line is crossed.

KaleWheatGrass · 2019-03-13T18:45:21+00:00

It is ok to have your own opinion. But the way you say something is the most important.

If you said you liked the friend's car and then said how your boyfriend's car is ugly without knowing which car was who's then your boyfriend would feel betrayed.

But if you said you liked the friends car...but you prefer being a passenger in your boyfriend's car...your boyfriend would probably like that.

Talking your boyfriend up in front of his friends will always raise his confidence and his appreciation of you. Let's say they're making fun or your boyfriends ears or something trivial just say how you love his ears in front of them.

Don't join in on the bro hating which is mild and friendly amongst men. But when their girlfriend joins in it will hurt.

brewmastermonk · 2019-03-13T16:34:18+00:00

They are retardedly using their cars as proxies to their perceived social status. You should have opted out and said you didn't know enough about them.

WorkWorkZubZub · 2019-03-14T14:30:15+00:00

Cars are often regarded as a symbol of a man's wealth and personality. You can tell a lot by the car a man chooses, and can afford, to drive.

In a subtle way, you were showing that you preferred the friend's taste in cars, and perhaps even a bit of his personality. For an extreme example, consider off-road truck guys to flashy sports car guys. If you were dating an offroad truck guy, but telling his friends that you'd really rather drive in a flashy sports car, that says something.

Ravenscar7 · 2019-03-15T14:58:30+00:00

I remember when I was out for drinks with my gf and one of her male friends had a problem with me for something that happened ages ago. She decided to side with him, forcing me to apologize and even after I did he still had a problem so my gf said I should go drink somewhere else.

To me it's a big turn off because you feel a sense of disloyalty. In a relationship I want to feel like me and my partner are both a strong team working to aid each other in each others mission.

rp_lili · 2019-03-13T16:13:43+00:00

Yeah, siding with your boyfriend is an important thing. That doesn't mean you can't do the opposite, especially playfully, but that would be in a more serious LTR and not in the dating phase.
What you're aiming for is to get his friends to tell him how impressed they are with you/how much of a catch you are/etc. (and I'm not just talking about looks).

I don't think laughing at his friend's jokes would be rude, and if you meet a man who thinks so maybe vet him some more before commiting because that just sounds weird.
Smiling too big I wouldn't say so but don't look too much/for too long at his friends, especially the ones you find attractive.
Keep it professional... that would just give off a serious weird vibe in my opinion... you're trying to be friendly with his friends, not getting a new job :p

TheSelfGoverned · 2019-03-14T06:51:28+00:00

Thats kind of a lame example on his part, and your boyfriend should've taken your (incorrect) answer lightheartedly.

As for making your man feel good. Flirty/sexy eye contact does it for me. If you had a couple drinks, a little PDA and tongue or a quick ass grab also works wonders.

A good rule is to keep the PDA at 3 seconds or less. If you all are super drunk... Maybe 10 seconds.

Startlivingfornow · 2019-03-13T19:47:11+00:00

This wasn’t a question of preference, guys don’t value your opinion that much. It was to see if he could cuck your boyfriend in front of him.

Good girlfriends I’ve had in the past would usually say something like , “I’ll stick with our beat up old Nissan any day.” While moving closer to me.

We both may know that she prefer the other car, but she’s showing the other guy my opinion matters more than his. It’s an ‘us’ thing.

Anything else would be a red flag.

Now, if she’s being specifically asked what she likes or it’s chit chat with a bigger group, she can say whatever she likes. There’s no me vs him scenario happening.

alpha-zach · 2019-03-13T16:11:20+00:00

Seems like you’ve got it figured out to me.

waste2muchtime · 2019-03-14T04:17:47+00:00

You should avoid laughing at other men's jokes.

red_philosopher · 2019-03-13T16:15:59+00:00

Anytime I catch one of my dates laughing at another guy's shitty jokes (where no one else laughs) I know immediately that it's over. I'll set up a few dates with other women and then let her know we're done. If she doesn't back me up when she has the chance, especially with something important, we're done. If she plays vagina loyalty games, we're done.

In your situation, I can understand the mistake, and I'd overlook it this time as it's genuinely based in not understanding the situation in its entirety. I had a similar experience once, and I damn near broke it off until it was clear that she didn't realize the full extent of what happened. I don't have the time to deal with shenanigans, and neither should your man. If it had been obvious that you/her were being shady, the next conversation I'd be having with my friends would be like this:

Friend: "Where's so and so?"

Me: "I dumped her."

Friend: "What? I'm so sorry. . ."

Me: "Why? I just gave myself a head start."

As for making him feel good? Show your attraction to him in mind, body and spirit. Say good things about him. Demonstrate your loyalty by rebuffing his friends' clumsy attempts to get into your pants. Be a cohesive unit, and don't try to win his friends over unnecessarily. After all, he doesn't need you to be popular with them. And above all, show integrity in your actions. Do what you say you are going to do.

If he's confident that you're worth his time, you'll rest easy knowing that he'll do anything for the two of you.

Title	How to make your man feel good in front of other guys/what NOT to do?
Author	ClaireLyons
Upvotes	69
Comments	35
Date	March 13, 2019 2:41 PM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/b0mrpz/how_to_make_your_man_feel_good_in_front_of_other/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/how-to-make-your-man-feel-good-in-front-of-other.221826 https://theredarchive.com/post/221826

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