Older women who never had children.

diener_zweier_herren · 2019-02-13T00:01:34+00:00

They're generally happy when they didn't want them.

They generally regret it when they wanted them but could not by whatever means.

Kind of like with everything

emailpassword12 · 2019-02-12T23:45:26+00:00

I know a few.

My Aunt who is in her 70s. Never married or had kids. She is very active in her community, volunteers with refugee kids, sings in the church choir etc. She seems very content with her life. She has a great niece and nephew now that she takes a great interest in. She is also very wealthy.

All the others would be considered "career" women. I don't know them as well as my aunt, but they all lead glamorous style lives. Lots of travelling and events etc. I know most of these women through my work, so I can see that I would be one of these type in the next 10 - 20 years.

I know one older childless lady who regrets it. She is married to quite an RP man. She is in her 50s, and he expects her to trot around in mini skirts an heels all day. She puts her makeup on before he wakes up. They met when he already had kids, and lead them to this life. Her life is what he wanted, and she is miserable, and tbh, quite a mean woman. She is constantly worried that one of the young women who work for her husband will sleep with him (which is hilarious, everyone thinks he is an old pig). She actually refers to him as her captain, which is sad. She put all her faith in him to lead them, and now she bitterly regrets her life.

Conversely, I know a woman in her 50s, who in her late 30s/early 40s her husband convinced her to have a baby. Well, he left her when she was 7 months pregnant. Shes pulled it together as a single mom, she is a high earning executive, and has done her best to embrace both roles, but, to this day she is angry that she is a mother, and as much as she loves her boy, she would prefer to be child free.

Atlas_B_Shruggin · 2019-02-13T01:24:32+00:00

I dont think regret and happiness are contradictory

I am a happy childless older woman. I do think it would have been nice to have had kids SO that I had grown up kids NOW, so yeh I kinda "regret" not having kids, but not in a way that impinges on my happiness or contentment. It would be nice to have lots of things I dont have, but that's life

brodudedoggman · 2019-02-12T23:30:14+00:00

I know two older childless ladies.

One is my husband's aunt, a supremely wealthy fancy English lady. She discovered they couldn't conceive after getting married, so she and her husband have spent their lives in philanthropy. She gives a lot of her money away, and is very generous in taking care of her nieces and nephews and their children.

The other is a friend who had to have a hysterectomy when she was young. She's now about 40 and successfully self employed. She has a long term bf who she travels with, and you see her at all the glamorous parties. She's very active and young at heart, I often see her in the newspaper's social pages.

They've both told me more than once that they wish they'd been able to have children, but neither seem at all unhappy with their lives. They've both built very enjoyable lives for themselves and keep strong family and social ties. I think it might be a different story if they were boring homebodies, ie living a "mum" lifestyle without having the children to pour yourself into.

esiemualB · 2019-02-13T00:55:28+00:00

Three of my mother's aunts never had children and were never married. They generally seemed very happy. As a child and a young teenager (unfortunately, they're all dead already) I never questioned their decision not to marry or have kids. To me, it was just normal that there were these three elderly ladies sharing a house. They also had a wide variety of interests (that they were able to pursue due to their well-paid jobs that had left them with good retirement plans) and took great care of themselves, so I assume that they were single and childless by choice, not due to lack of men who were interested in them.

LeJacquelope · 2019-02-12T23:27:58+00:00

I imagine they're happy af.

Willow-girl · 2019-02-13T04:36:24+00:00

No kids, no regrets here! I have never met a childfree (by choice) woman who regretted not having kids.

My partner is childfree too thank ghod! If I had to do it all over, the only thing I would do differently is to hold out for a childfree partner right from the start. Two of my ex-husbands had children with whom they had relationships, and whenever there are stepkids, there will be hassles. Even if they're generally good kids, they tend to be very very expensive ...

Uncommon_Sensed_1234 · 2019-02-13T00:26:27+00:00

My husband and I are almost 50 and we are happy with our decision.

Since kids no longer take care of their parents when they are old I see no benefit of investing time and money into them.

Pastelitomaracucho · 2019-02-13T01:53:57+00:00

They seem pleased with their lives. Seems that they didn't live through the extremes of having children these days. Not high thrills, but not a lot of drama.

philomexa · 2019-02-13T02:32:41+00:00

Some family members and acquaintances are single and childfree, seemingly by choice. They all have bougie careers and there is a lot of traveling for work and pleasure. A few have boytoys in exotic locales, but most (especially retirement aged ladies), are over it and have zero inerest in dealing with men. A few other older female relatives have less stellar careers more maternal personalities, they've banded together to raise fuck ups, bastards, and castaways that pop up every so often. They seem content and well suited for the mother hen role.

Everyone seem content with their lives; strong family and friend relationships plus economic freedom keeps the crazy away.

sadomasochrist · 2019-02-13T13:38:59+00:00

Studies are clear, kids and marriages make people less happy. This isn't even a question.

The only question you have to ask yourself is if you can find fulfillment in a non traditional or biological way.

I didn't believe such a thing was authentic so we had kids. I plan on having A LOT of them.

GradualDecomp · 2019-02-13T00:08:57+00:00

I'm 35, if that counts. I'm happy as fuck.

natguy2016 · 2019-02-13T16:19:35+00:00

My younger sister has Lupus. She is in remission and doing well.

However, any pregnancy could endanger my younger sister's life. She never had kids.

My sister's job is working with kids and adolescents in a day program.

Me? I have Cerebral Palsy and know I take a lot more effort and energy.

I have 15 cousins, so I never developed 24/7 patience.

I have a niece whom I adore, but never thought about my own children.

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[deleted] · 2019-02-13T13:33:06+00:00

Depends if she chose not to have kids or if she wanted them but couldn't for whatever reason.

JezebeltheQueen5656 · 2019-02-13T15:05:23+00:00

hate them. never wanted any and never regretted my decision.

quasirealikecreature · 2019-02-14T09:50:30+00:00

Alternatively, I know some older women who were stay at home moms and now regret having children.

Like anything else, it depends on the people. I never wanted kids. I accidentally became pregnant. I have a kid. It's interesting seeing the kid learn and develop a personality and interests but the first year was the most boring shit ever.

ScootsScoots · 2019-02-15T17:02:53+00:00

They are lost and dont know why. They regularly engage in degenerate type risky behavior to feel something.

Theres a reason they all have cats and drink too much. To fill the hole they left empty.

Of course there are outliers and I'm sure I'm gonna get plenty of replies from those people who are just so sure they are the latter and not the former.

[deleted] · 2019-02-13T16:08:08+00:00

I think most of people of either gender, who don't eventually have kinds, eventually get sour and bitter. They seem constantly grumpy and bothered by small things.

One great thing about kids is they give you perspective. It's hard to sweat minor annoyances at work when you have something 10x more important (and often more difficult/mentally taxing) going on at home. Kids give you kind of... warm satisfaction of knowing that you are doing at least one fundamentally good, and important, thing with your life.

Now, for older singletons, the only way to achieve this is to have a really great life's work. Something you have no doubt will leave a legacy and impact on the world. But let's face it, most human beings don't contribute to the species much, or love their work to any great extent.

blackedoutfast · 2019-02-13T00:38:38+00:00

they range from somewhat odd to completely batshit crazy.

also every one of them has something else in their life that they can obsess over and redirect their natural female child rearing drives toward. maybe it's their career, maybe it's a dog, maybe it's some random hobby or organization that they're part of. but there's always something that they go all in on that becomes the focus of their lives in the same way that women with children make the kids the focus of their lives

Title	Older women who never had children.
Author	Betanorman
Upvotes	3
Comments	60
Date	February 12, 2019 11:19 PM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/apzqjg/older_women_who_never_had_children/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/older-women-who-never-had-children.257259 https://theredarchive.com/post/257259

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