How not to be a glib narcissistic sociopath with TRP?

officerkondo · 2018-08-05T11:28:33+00:00

Just be purple, not red. Pursue relationships and meaning, not casual sex and to "enjoy the decline". I would endeavor to tell the truth more, it will hurt initially, but it is a better long term strategy.

wtknight · 2018-08-05T15:09:55+00:00

The core problem with TRP is that it fosters negative trust issues with women. You just have to try to find love and a relationship, and realize that not all women are good people and not all women are compatible with you, but that many of them are good people, and that you have to trust somebody eventually in order to find love and happiness.

Million-Suns · 2018-08-05T16:47:59+00:00

You're angry and bitter because your current reality which is marked with short term sexual success thanks to the red pill toolset totally questioned the reality that christian values push. That the Good always prevail and that the good men always get the girls in the end.

Truth being is that the Devil has already won.

If you haven't been told lies in the beginning , like 90% + of men, you would not have been in that situation.

Only advice is to realize that we live in a cruel and ugly world, and that female nature is what it is, and try to make peace with that and move on. Mainly by focusing on yourself. Forget about the greater good and about making the society a better place. That is a vain endeavor.

2018-08-06T00:04:08+00:00

Whatever darker shadows I have in my personality I still need to take responsibility, speak truth and contribute to society I want a good life.

You are a man. Thats your nature. Men want to compete, construct, protect and provide. Sex is not your only nature.

I think there is a pitfall just chasing girls and validation that will make its mark on your soul over time if you are not anchored in something.

Chasing women is a pitfall yes, but for some men. You are the kind of guy who need more than sex and validation. The player life is not for you, there is no demerit in it or shame, it is just how you are. It is not for me too.

There are multiple types of men. You should focus in your other matures my friend. Maybe find a partner and live the beta life. Alpha status is hard work has really restrict (although plentiful) rewards.

I myself was thinking on your depiction. Maybe you should go MGTOW for a while. It helps to rearrange your thoughts when you are younger. Find what you want and go after it. TRP is a tool. But maybe it is not the tool for your job.

Good luck.

DouchyArtCollector · 2018-08-05T12:00:01+00:00

[permanently deleted]

spoonthrower · 2018-08-05T12:49:52+00:00

OP, you've been suckered into a particular kind of consumerist capitalist logic. You think you can just buy an existential reason for living, whether it's adopting bogus ideas of value in order to attain what you've convinced yourself must be an important resource (sex) or amassing 'content' like Dawkins and Peterson and trying to carve out something you can believe in aphorism by meaningless aphorism.

Instead of being a weak little man who follows with hook and sinker whatever anyone with even the most bare resemblance of authority tells you, try focusing instead on understanding your own needs. Strip away the pill nonsense and the bullshit pop-evo-psych and instead think for yourself about what foundation you'd want to build you life on.

Or adopt a religion instead. That one's easier.

2018-08-05T21:09:22+00:00

I have been in a similar situation dude..
Tacticts that TRP aim for will mostly work on superficial women. Avoid superficial people in general and get back to being your old, happy self.
Avoid superficial women, avoid superficial men and avoid pursuing superficial "goals" like casual sex.

Be a good, honest husband and father.
Work with something you feel is important and do a great job.
That is where true happiness is found.

That's what I am aiming for and I am becoming more and more happy for every day.

nomansweb · 2018-08-05T12:24:09+00:00

You're like a militant atheist who gets in a car crash and then becomes a fundamentalist christian or muslim. It's in your personality to switch between extremes. Red pill is what happened when a lot of people like you created an extremist splinter faction of PUA and man's rights ideas. The problem is with you, not with the ideas. You have to center yourself first.

2018-08-05T17:48:09+00:00

Honestly I don't see what's wrong with "being a narcissistic sociopath" as long as you're not breaking any laws

People who disagree with this, are just not self-aware enough to realize that they have done much worse things in the name of self-interest

Meaning of life is to maximize your position (become insanely rich), then afterwards maximize the position of a lot of other people (use money to improve the world)

Anything other than that is BS emotional rationalization

DesignerDebates · 2018-08-05T11:08:39+00:00

OP please make a small edit in your post to summon the automod

This comment can serve as automod until one shows up.

it_takes_the_redpill · 2018-08-05T12:26:48+00:00

Like u/Rian_Stone says, at the end of the day TRP is pretty much guys swapping notes on what works in the sexual marketplace.

It you've somehow turned it into a dogma, maybe just cut it out?

Use/follow the useful parts. Don't use/follow the non-useful parts.

Just because TRP is amoral doesn't mean you aren't allowed to have morals. It just means they expect you not to concern troll over personal morality while engaging in discussion on the sub.

There are things I personally feel it's wrong to do (despite my secular lifestyle), thus won't do. I just don't have the right to say "hey, that's wrong to do" when I'm there. Some of the best advice in life is "keep your own council" and it's especially applicable to your situation. You should still be engaging critical faculties and deciding whether or not to implement the things you read.

So the glibness and sociopathy are matters of you ignoring your own input on the matter at hand. As to the narcissism? There are some positive things that come of it, and plenty of negatives. Only one person in your world cares the most about your interests, man. That's you. But there's a huge difference between NPD and adopting a few qualities. Use the search feature, there's plenty of discussion on narcissism.

Signed, Someone who has managed not to turn into a glib, narcissistic sociopath yet.

2018-08-05T15:32:33+00:00

How about you start searching for a wife material woman who is honest and you can be honest with? Then have children and start worrying about how you are going to raise children successfully in a society whose foundations are crazy lies about equalia, white people are all evil, and give more of (your) money to the poor lazy non-working scum class?

daveofmars · 2018-08-05T16:05:46+00:00

It's pretty common for younger guys to find something new and dive head first into it without dipping their toes in first. It sounds to me like you went too hard, too fast. Now, you have to find a balance in using this newfound power responsibly. Just because you can do something, doesn't mean you should. Your religious ethics should kick in about here.

YaAmar · 2018-08-05T17:16:30+00:00

Get girlfriends, there's nothing wrong with having someone steady, just don't get married, don't co-habitate, and don't get emotionally attached to your girlfriend(s) because the chances of you getting cheated on or dumped are prettty high, and it's not because of you. But due to female nature. If you had all of this candy would you care for only one chocolate bar?

flamingoinghome · 2018-08-05T17:34:31+00:00

Look, when it comes to ideologies and ways of living, sometimes the proof is in the pudding. If an ideology is making you depressed and unsatisfied, it is a bad ideology that you should give up. You don't need to push others into giving it up (people who lose their faith don't need to drag others out of church, for instance), but it is bad to do things that hurt you. And for what it's worth, I think you're right--chasing random women around for flings is a hollow and joyless way to live. It's good to get in shape and such, and you should keep at it, but you're right, you need something bigger.

There's nothing wrong with being "between worldviews"--read some philosophy, attend some services for different religions (many don't even require a personal deity, if that's not something you can see yourself believing in), think hard about what you want your career to be. Maybe there's a discipline or type of work you really love, and you can give your passion for it to the world. I also highly recommend actively pursuing both community and some meaningful friendships--people get flinchy about it, but feeling like you're a part of your own world is important. It is also possible to fall in love--romantically and platonically. Even if you don't get there, the pursuit is worthy.

It sounds like you're young, and that's good--there's a big old world out there. You may have to look behind a lot of corners, but you will find a place in it for yourself.

Gravel_Roads · 2018-08-05T19:27:12+00:00

Sounds like RP got you laid by lowering your standards for quality company.

But it’s also fair to acknowledge that it’s easy to accidentally become callous the older we get, too. I’m pretty callous myself, and that is my struggle: To learn to be patient, to remember that people are living life in response to their history, not me, and that by having the knowledge and awareness of how to walk a away, I have control at all times, but sadly MOST people are not so aware.

Be critical of your conclusions, and try to figure out traits you LIKE in other people (men AND women), and remind yourself that flaws can be endearing too, if we cut people a little slack.

Sounds like you have good self awareness, to recognize that your quality of life has changed. That’s a good sign. This is also kinda just part of growing up and figuring out what YOU value in people and partners.

blackedoutfast · 2018-08-05T19:47:27+00:00

RP isn't the problem. stop clinging to all the cucky Christianity and Jordan Peterson BS. all that nonsense is what is making you feel guilty about putting yourself first.

it's not really RP at all, it's just the same submissive, altruistic blupill "work hard and be obedient and be a good little beta for the good of society" BS. it just has a veneer of traditionalism to appeal to the guys like you who are hesitant about completely swallowing the RP.

also, it is NOT RP at all to become antisocial or stop having friends. it is common to drop your bluepill/beta friends as you become more RP. but you're not supposed to just not have any friends, you're supposed to make new friends with people who are compatible with the new improved RP version of you.

there are a lot of self-described RPers and guys on TRP who try to play up the "i'm a mysterious lone wolf supreme alpha i don't need any friends" or that gay "sigma male" bullshit. DO NOT LISTEN TO THOSE GUYS. they're mostly just shy low SMV losers pretending to be alpha males. it's almost impossible for a truly high-SMV RPish guy to not have an extensive social network, everyone wants to be friends with those high value guys so they can leach off some of that value for themselves.

passepar2t · 2018-08-05T22:36:34+00:00

You "need" to contribute to society? Who says you "need" to contribute? To which part of society?

Also, being a glib narcissistic sociopath is considered a virtue under red pill thinking. Specifically the evil CEO type of sociopath, not the imprisoned petty criminal type.

2018-08-06T00:04:27+00:00

I agree with a lot of the comments on here like consider religion again and also that TRP isn't something to follow blindly, more a tool to help usually pathetic men with women.

I want to give my perspective of TRP which is negative. When I first found it, I loved it because it was the only place I saw anybody talking about Men's rights. I'm politically minded and raised by a very "alpha" single dad (who ended up fully committed to my stepmom, although he could easily play the field forever if he wanted.) At first I loved TRP because it was the only place I saw discussing issues that had directly affected me like the breakdown of the nuclear family, girlfriends cheating, negative aspects of feminism, etc.

But TRP doesn't offer any direction to "go" and creates a nihilist mindset. Jordan Peterson, and even some of the alt-right websites I browsed at the time, offered a healthier view of male/female relationships. Even my alpha dad saw the benefit of settling down with someone, something that TRP actively derides even to the point of insulting each other when one finally does seek that natural, human connection.

If you think of this as a "phase" in your life I think you'll be ok. But it does create some toxic mindsets that are so hard to break free from and can't really be broken except with faith. I know in my case, I screwed up a relationship with a really good partner because I took TRP theory as dogma rather than a tool.

Looking back I can't believe how stupid I was. We live in a purple world. Although I wouldn't have been able to attract that person without red pill, because my self esteem was so low before, after that I judged the person on an impossible standard. And never saw them again. We were both "red" but that wasn't good enough for me, i needed crimson, because I was too scared to be vulnerable.

always_sad12 · 2018-08-06T09:47:25+00:00

No system is perfect.

TRP is the best system men have. However, not all of it is true. I find that AWALT is not true. It is a spectrum. Some women are unicorns on the left side of the spectrum for all intents and purposes, assuming you're not the most controlling and unattractive beta. Some women are on the right side of the AWALT spectrum and are the stereotypical women that the average TRP user complains about.

But you have to find out for yourself what is and is not true. Don't forget, though, that a very large portion of TRP is true. It's just a few exceptions you must carve out for yourself. I want a family in the end, and so my journey is different than many other journeys on TRP, so I have to learn to think for myself. You do too. I would suggest you base most of it off TRP, and make your own deviations from there, instead of basing your belief system on something else and then implementing TRP. That doesn't work as well.

And if you want love, and not to spin plates till you're an old dude, then you will have to deviate. And that's fine. My last bit of advice is to know what to never deviate from, though. Like always understand the SMP and always push your value upwards, never get too comfortable. You can open up, but always understand that if you open up too much, no matter who it is, they will see you differently. Never stop inducing emotions in her, and know how to pick 'em in the first place. I think even with these iron-wrought rules, you can still have a happy life with fulfilling relationships. In fact, it might just be the only way. The rest we're going to have to find out over time.

newName543456 · 2018-08-06T13:40:08+00:00

TRP is amoral. That doesn't mean you are not allowed to have your own morality to follow in your life, what you don't get to do is imposing it on others.

swl016 · 2018-08-10T22:42:10+00:00

Wanting to sleep with women is like wanting to breathe if your a man. You working to make yourself happy by getting lots of sex or settling down is nothing to feel bad about. If your honest about what you want from a girl than what is there to feel bad about?

cateml · 2018-08-05T14:38:21+00:00

I know that my problems are mine and many people reading TRP have their shit together, but I also see this problem commented and discussed from the more insightful and experienced posters on the TRP forums.

To be clear I am not redpill and think it is a very bad thing, so I'm probably not going to see it from the same perspective, but I still don't think its uncharitable of me to say 'I believe there are a lot of guys in redpill/MRA/etc. who even don't feel any conflict or deal with internal conflict/dissonance by becoming more extreme and radical, wouldn't approve of this line of thinking, and this is probably why you don't see posts like this.' The less charitable version would be to bring up the cult like aspect of that issue.

The truth - red pill/blue pill/whatever - is that if you spend your time reading, listening to and talking to people about hateful things or who are contemptuous of everyone who isn't them, thats what a lot of your thoughts are going to be about, and you're eventually going to become hateful and contemptuous in general. I don't think there is any way around that. Human emotions can have a somewhat infectious quality, and if you constantly solidify only one of them by 'echo chambering' around angry people, you're going to solidify (perhaps not terminally but still) yourself as an angry person. I actually also feel this way about left-leaning writers/videos that disparage/mock white supremacists, anti-feminists etc. Even though I generally agree with them and the points they're making, and it can be fun and funny, you have to be careful not to watch or engage in too much of it, because if you spend too much time thinking snarky and disparaging stuff, you'll end up a snarky and disparaging person, which is bad even when the person is arguably deserving of it.

My advice would be simply - don't look for the answer to this in TRP or 'the manosphere' in general. Take a step out of that box for a bit.

For example, their are plenty of legitimate criticisms of evolutionary psychology (that are in no way critical of evolution happening or it impacting our psychology) and alternative schools of psychology. Take a look at them. They might well not persuade you against evo psych (and shouldn't in the respect that most wouldn't argue that it is entirely without value or validity), but its good to be able to look at what you're interested in and believe in through a critical lens sometimes.
If you've read Dawkins, and read Pinker..... why not try reading some Cordelia Fine, for example? You might totally disagree with her, and with most of what she is saying, but you also might agree with some of it and it might give you a very slightly different perspective you can use to apply when necessary going forward.
Basically, we should all strive when educating ourselves to make sure we are familiar with and open to alternative perspectives and arguments. You might well not come back agreeing with them, but at least it can help us understand where 'the other side' is coming from and examine our own biases and assumptions.

I'm not saying you should stop reading and believing red pill stuff (full disclaimer - I think you should, but thats not what I'm trying to persuade you of here, thats your decision at the end of the day). But if you're finding it wanting in terms of what you think and feel is right in terms of your personal development, it might be a good idea to look in other places for those needs and see if there are other ways they can be met, because I don't think what it seems you're looking for is something you're necessarily going to find in the manosphere (or Jordan Peterson, but he is a whole other thing for another day, and if you like it and it helps you all power to you).

You can still get validation from short term sexual success, try to sleep with girls, etc. if thats what you want whilst also looking for deeper meaning and connection in other places and ways. For all the forgetting it people seem to do here, those things aren't mutually exclusive.

Title	How not to be a glib narcissistic sociopath with TRP?
Author	DouchyArtCollector
Upvotes	12
Comments	61
Date	August 5, 2018 10:46 AM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/94r1ab/how_not_to_be_a_glib_narcissistic_sociopath_with/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/how-not-to-be-a-glib-narcissistic-sociopath-with.261261 https://theredarchive.com/post/261261

Comments