CMV: If a woman feels a man might hurt her if she expresses a lack of consent, she shouldn't be going anywhere near him.

Ercole-- · 2017-04-06T00:33:02+00:00

And what if she felt safe with him until he started expressing more aggressive behaviors once they were alone together?

HugMuffin · 2017-04-06T01:18:56+00:00

Hey, I made that post! Only makes sense I should have a comment.

I agree. If she's unable to voice a lack of consent, it's probably a bad idea to get into intimate situations with him.

However.

This does not mean that if the man (or woman. Modern times and all) proceeds without consent, it isn't a rape. The woman certainly made a mistake by trusting this guy not to take it beyond her boundaries, but only the man is actually making the move without receiving consent. I worry you're about to blame her for it.

purpleppp · 2017-04-06T00:41:47+00:00

"I don't want to express non-consent because he's stronger than me." is not really enough to convict someone of a crime. However, the guy should also learn to read the woman's expression. IMO it's pretty obvious when the other person is not into it. In terms of a criminal conviction, though, I don't think you can put the burden on the guy to read a woman's mind.

BiggerDthanYou · 2017-04-06T07:41:25+00:00

Well the problem is that she can't tell if he's going to become a pushy douche or not and it's impossible to tell how she might react in that moment. It's just like every guy thinks he would stop a terrorist attack if it's happening next to him, but in reality most get scared so much that they can't move anymore. And in the same way she might think that she would fight back and leave, but in reality resisting is often seen as being potentially way more dangerous than letting him have his way.

So she met a cool nice guy and takes him home to make out more and to get into the mood, but as soon as they enter he instantly shoves his hand down her pants. She doesn't feel ready yet and pushes it away. But he ignores that and just pushes his hand down her pants yet again. She pushes it away again, but he pins her down and starts undressing her.

Suddenly he no longer is that cool nice guy. He became a douche that clearly gives no fuck about her consent and she's certainly justified in becoming afraid of him.

Now what? She can't just leave because he clearly demonstrated that he's willing to hold her against her will and she can't realistically fight back because one punch of his could kill her, but she's unlikely to do any damage.

How could she have known that he would turn out like this until it was already too late?

Plus why are men treated like children here? Don't they have responsibilities as well?

If he can't control himself, can't read situations or her body language and doesn't understand consent he shouldn't be having sex either. A guy that ignores her verbal and nonverbal no's is a rapist no matter how much TRP hamsters it away as just her being too childish too resist harder.

NameOfAction · 2017-04-06T00:20:04+00:00

If you're in any situation you feel is dangerous you should leave, man or woman, sexual or not. Don't put yourself in danger.

Electra_Cute · 2017-04-06T00:33:02+00:00

Well, I have personally been in situations where I did not know that the male had sexual interest in me and I thought he was only interested in being friends, then they attempted to make a sexual advance that was quickly shut down. I simply expressed clearly that I was not interested in sexual intercourse with that particular individual, this however does not mean that I was not afraid in doing so, because it is a frightening situation saying no to someone who can overpower you physically.

I would surmise that a large number of females are not as brave. Just because I was afraid to say no, if the sex did happen, it was not "rape", it was just unwanted sex, which is not the same. "Rape" is a criminal act that has an intention.

I have learned, from experience that explicitly detesting sexual advances is the only consistent means of letting a male know that you are not having sex, even one action implying consent is enough for the majority of males to keep going.

It is far more optimal, to teach both genders about consent to avoid women cry wolfing "rape" because they had unwanted sex and to stop women from having the unwanted sex, additionally it is optimal for people not to put themselves in any dangerous situation.

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badnews4u · 2017-04-06T13:06:57+00:00

"where a girl is getting naked with a guy much bigger than her and really muscular"

how dumb is this girl in the scenario, that this shit ends at this exact point and not way before? holy shit and im meant to pretend at the same time that these same girls are logical

mistresswhat · 2017-04-07T00:50:49+00:00

TRP: Women are really easy to manipulate if you just follow these easy steps!

Also TRP: no, of course none of the women in my life have any idea that I'm totally misogynistic because I hide it really well.

ALSO TRP: if a woman fails to realize that a man is dangerous that's entirely her fault, because there's no way on earth that a guy who is planning to rape a woman would ever manipulate her or hide his true intentions.

[deleted] · 2017-04-06T01:30:01+00:00

[deleted]

LaToroBlanco · 2017-04-06T01:17:08+00:00

I tend to agree, but it's probably easy to say when you're not in a situation.

prodigy2throw · 2017-04-06T01:47:19+00:00

There's always two different discussions happening when this gets brought up:

TBP thinks TRP is implying that if a woman is alone with a guy and gets raped, it's okay.

TRP is actually just saying women should treat all guns as loaded and be more careful who they are alone with. Especially if they're the quiet and shy type

[deleted] · 2017-04-06T06:06:42+00:00

A better question is, why would a woman follow a man into his bedroom, making out the whole way, then wake up the next day saying she was raped?

Women should not be alone with men on their bed. Women take things there knowing exactly what is going to happen, regret it, then say it's rape .

Not how it works.

Title	CMV: If a woman feels a man might hurt her if she expresses a lack of consent, she shouldn't be going anywhere near him.
Author	soccerstar77
Upvotes	2
Comments	141
Date	April 6, 2017 12:17 AM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/63pjh7/cmv_if_a_woman_feels_a_man_might_hurt_her_if_she/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/cmv-if-a-woman-feels-a-man-might-hurt-her-if-she.269062 https://theredarchive.com/post/269062

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