[Discussion] Analyze this thread from /r/Menslib "Why Feminist Dating Advice Sucks"

Atlas_B_Shruggin · 2016-10-09T17:24:58+00:00

hilarious, thank god i wasnt a gross feminist nerd with all kinds of rules for how creepy gross men hit on me and that cute guys liked me. what a fucking mess.

Ultramegasaurus · 2016-10-09T16:45:43+00:00

They are walking on eggshells in order to not trigger their feminist overlords but mostly dash out TRP tenets, e.g. ask out a lot of women, do not listen to women's dating advice, be quick & assertive, feminism and women's expectations are contradictory and so on.

autoNFA · 2016-10-09T17:04:58+00:00

Feminist dating advice, as a general rule, regards a woman's discomfort during dating/flirting as an atrocity committed by the man flirting with her. It encourages men to be thoroughly risk-averse to avert the possibility that some woman might ever feel mildly put off by a man.

CrazyTom54 · 2016-10-09T16:42:32+00:00

He's right. Taking advice from a feminist on how to date is like taking advice from a fish on how to breath air.

YouDislikeMyOpinion · 2016-10-09T17:42:19+00:00

Most responses that I read resemble this one mentally:

As a man who has dated quite a bit, I disagree. So – did I get that right – your "true" advice would be for young men to be more aggressive and masculine? What would that even look like? Coming to school wearing sunglasses and a leather jacket?

Now that I've read some more responses, there are a few good points out there. But it still seems like everyone is arguing about semantics

Here's another response I want to highlight:

This is one of my huge struggles as a feminist man. I don't want to objectify women or be seen as a creep who reinforces patriarchy. And as someone who has Asperger's, I struggle with dating enough as it is. But I've had far more dating success acting like a typical guy e.g outright hitting on someone in conversation(NOT threatening behavior like catcalling) and flirting as well as checking them out than being passive and constantly trying to not step on toes.

I'd actually wager I've creeped more people out trying too hard to be sensitive and a Nice Guy than just outright going for it. People can sense fear.

In the end because of my principles i fear im always walking a tightrope.

GroovyEFS · 2016-10-09T20:55:57+00:00

That sub is just PPD (or maybe /r/ppdPersonalAdvice?) with a massive heaping of political correctness on top. Everyone writing novellas to make it super clear they're totally not being problematic. Very little actual substance, but a lot of eggshells.

A perfect example of why I'd rather ask an incel for dating advice than a feminist. Would be just as useful.

Scurvemuch · 2016-10-09T16:53:25+00:00

reading that thread hurt my eyes. So much double speak. So much tip toeing.

So much submerged misogeny.

redmachines · 2016-10-09T17:00:35+00:00

It sucks because it benefits women. Real dating advice is non vague and can be applied to anyone looking for romance and provides real results. What women give you is nonsense. They will do anything to deflect criticism on themselves and put it on you. For example, leaving your current residence and moving somewhere where there are more women is real dating advice. Women are reluctant to tell you that because it implies that the women at your current residence isn't worth your time. Women want men to bend over to their standards and real dating advice opposes this.

BlackPill_Inc · 2016-10-09T18:19:38+00:00

Dating advice is useless.

If someone's seeking it, then they're clearly unattractive physically and/or personality-wise.

Being told to smile more or not fold your arms isn't go help you.

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despisedlove2 · 2016-10-09T18:30:20+00:00

I never did get this after getting past my awkward teenage years.

Why does anyone need training? You want something? You go get it.

If it is a woman you are after, let her know upfront. The worst that can happen is that she will say no. Big deal. Her loss.

Life is about passion about what makes you a man. Someone you respect in the mirror.

Women are generally too shallow and dull to hold your passion for long, especially these days.

If you are obsessed about sex, make it clear that it is about sex alone. If not, good riddance to bad rubbish.

wub1234 · 2016-10-09T17:08:05+00:00

I've been banned from /r/menslib because I don't hate men.

Are you sure that's the reason? I can easily see that there might be another reason...

wub1234 · 2016-10-09T17:02:58+00:00

I'm not reading the whole thing because all dating advice is pointless, apart from what I've already pointed out here elsewhere. If you really want to know the few things that matter, I'll tell you quite happily for free.

However, regarding this bit:

To me, it's clear that the obverse of that coin is young men being judged for their lack of masculinity. Young men are expected to be

confident tall successful, or at least employed enough to buy dinner tall, seriously broad-shouldered active, never passive muscular not showing too much emotion

I could sit here and list the 10 or so physical attributes that are ideal. But it's not that men are expected to have these attributes, it just so happens that seem to be attractive for what we can only assume are genetic reasons.

This is such a common misunderstanding, that women somehow don't respect you, disdain you or even despise you if they won't sleep with you!

See if you can see the difference between the two:

"I hate you, I despise you, I don't respect you".

"I don't want to have sex with you".

Difficult one to understand, but there is a difference between the two.

Title	[Discussion] Analyze this thread from /r/Menslib "Why Feminist Dating Advice Sucks"
Author	Changes4175
Upvotes	9
Comments	73
Date	October 9, 2016 4:37 PM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/56mypg/discussion_analyze_this_thread_from_rmenslib_why/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/discussion-analyze-this-thread-from-rmenslib-why.272517 https://theredarchive.com/post/272517

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