Women: Can a man have a partner count that was too high for it to be a dealbreaker?

3dbattleship · 2016-01-02T01:08:36+00:00

All things being equal, 6 is WAY better than 300. I want someone who values sex as a sign of love like I do. In RP words, I want someone who can "pair-bond".

ozymandias271 · 2016-01-02T01:27:52+00:00

Can't imagine why I'd give a fuck.

damaskrose · 2016-01-02T00:41:25+00:00

Automatic dealbreaker.
I would rather have the one with 6 partners, but even 6 seems kind of high to me.

appencapn · 2016-01-02T03:57:06+00:00

Sometimes its harder to screen for herpes, HPV and I would assume with that partner count he has both. Honestly his partner count really just tells me his social life and values are in misalignment with mine.
Sex with 6 people. Performance is something that can be learned and sorry 300 just feels disgusting to me. Its really abnormal for anyone to have had sex with 300 people and again value misalignment.

[deleted] · 2016-01-02T04:47:42+00:00

There are many things to keep in mind when choosing someone for an LTR and sexual history isn't the one with the more weight. However, everything else being equal: 1. 100 is a very high number. A person who spends so much time looking for sex probably has emotional issues that become apparent even when you don't really know their number. In fact, it is this issues that would be a great turn off for me and not the number per se. Provided that the solved this issues I'd probably accept him, but I don't really know. Never been in that situation.

I prefer the one that has had 6 partners. When it comes to people my age, this is around average. As long as the guy is emotionally stable I'm even ok if he's just had one before me. As I have said, it's not the number, but what it might mean.
This only matters in theory, I'm all for "don't ask don't tell" policy.

Vampiresquidina · Sat Jan 2 5:18:15 2016 UTC

Would not touch with 10-foot pole. And not just because of STDs.
6

Reason: I'd worry he can't commit, and I'd always feel like just another notch on his bedpost, even if he married me. Not attractive. "Congratulations! You're my 300th customer! Here's a ring!" Balloons fall from ceiling, etc...

[deleted] · 2016-01-02T00:53:40+00:00

My only preference is for a clean bill of health and good sexual performance. I really don't care about the exact number.

dragoness_leclerq · 2016-01-02T07:06:30+00:00

Yes
6

SpaceWhiskey · 2016-01-02T08:32:26+00:00

As long as he's actually clean, I don't see why it should matter. My current partner has had about 80 partners. He was in a band when he was younger and toured pretty extensively, wasn't looking for commitment and had girls throwing themselves at him. The circumstances check out, I'd probably do the same thing given the chance. I don't think he's weird or broken for it. He tested clean when we started dating and we both have since as well. I have no complaints.

sofcknwrong · 2016-01-02T13:15:11+00:00

Hundreds of partners is a big red flag. It points to a lack of impulse control and self-reflection, and if he's constantly chasing sex that means he probably doesn't have many other passionate interests. I'd also assume that someone who shags indiscriminately doesn't really have good enough taste in women to be worthy of me.

Next.

wuboo · 2016-01-02T00:12:38+00:00

Yes, I've seen some women run for the hills when they find out how high it is.

wub1234 · 2016-01-02T04:04:51+00:00

This is such a stupid question. Of course some women are going to be weary if you've had hundreds of sexual partners.

[deleted] · 2016-01-02T07:19:10+00:00

For both questions:

So long as his number doesn't increase while WITH me, I don't care. That said, attractive men will have a high count. Who cares?

5th_Law_of_Robotics · 2016-01-02T00:16:59+00:00

i can't imagine that i'd be compatible with someone that has such a high count. there's nothing wrong with having a high count, in general, but it doesn't seem like we would have enough in common to have a successful relationship. i would definitely prefer the guy with 6 partners to someone with hundreds, personally.

demerera · 2016-01-02T00:17:38+00:00

Wouldnt be a dealbreaker, i might be more wary pof him cheating though. It would make me insecure but if i really liked the guy it wouldnt change anything
Wouldnt care, makes no diffeerence

Atlas_B_Shruggin · 2016-01-02T02:43:48+00:00

It never occured to me that men I've ltred didn't have really high numbers. I asumed all cute guys did

[deleted] · 2016-01-02T06:01:27+00:00

[permanently deleted]

[deleted] · 2016-01-02T06:43:42+00:00

Imagine if there's a guy with a partner count of a few 100. Would that be a dealbreaker for you?

No.

For marriage/LTR, would you rather a guy who's had sex with 6 people before you, or would you rather a guy who's had sex with 300 girls before? Or do you have no preference?

Was it deliberate that you used the word "people" for the first guy but girls for the second? Is the first guy a bi/pan guy? I'd rather date a bi guy than a straight guy, but I can't see having a preference based on just the numbers.

oryxic · 2016-01-02T08:04:45+00:00

1.) It wouldn't be an immediate dealbreaker, but it would be a concern. There'd be a lot of factors, including age. (A 50 year old dude with 100 partners is less eyebrow raising than a 20 year old dude with 100 partners).

2.) I'd generally lean towards the 6, but as others said it's more that I'd be concerned that the higher number would be incompatible with my relationship values. (I tend to gravitate towards LTRs and someone with 300 partners would not seem to). But I'd at least tell them my concerns and see what they thought as part of the process.

artichokess · 2016-01-02T10:41:04+00:00

not a deal breaker, sounds like he's gotten to know a bunch of people and probably has interesting stories, not to mention he's probably pretty skilled in bed
if all things were equal, it wouldn't matter to me

questioningwoman · 2016-01-02T17:58:08+00:00

If no STDs and no HIV then no.

AutoModerator · 2017-05-04T18:38:14+00:00

Attention!

You can post off topic/jokes/puns as a comment to this Automoderator message.
For "CMV" and "Question for X" Threads: Parent comments that aren't from the target group will be removed, along with their child replies.
If you want to agree with OP instead of challenging their view or if the question is not targeted at you, post it as an answer to this comment.
OP you can choose your own flair according to these guidelines., just press Flair under your post!

Thanks for your cooperation and enjoy the discussion!

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

Title	Women: Can a man have a partner count that was too high for it to be a dealbreaker?
Author	pakleader
Upvotes	2
Comments	68
Date	January 2, 2016 12:06 AM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/3z2rp1/women_can_a_man_have_a_partner_count_that_was_too/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/women-can-a-man-have-a-partner-count-that-was-too.277342 https://theredarchive.com/post/277342

Comments