[Advice/Discussion] Should I be worried about my GF's sexual history?

TRPlurk15 · 2015-06-29T23:22:16+00:00

That fact that you are worried about it makes me wonder if there are other things wrong in the relationship. Do you think this is something that TRP put into your head or would you have been questioning your compatibility with her without it?

AureliusThunderkok · 2015-06-29T22:54:21+00:00

I have no idea why you would seriously consider ending a 1.5 year relationship for something that ante-dated it. She experimented with her sexuality when she was young. Hardly unusual. Nothing about her present circumstances raised a red flag. She has regrets but has moved on. As long as her n count is 'one' since you guys began LTR then all is good.

taiboworks · 2015-06-30T04:10:42+00:00

how old are you? what's your partner count?

haircombsnightmare · 2015-06-30T00:07:28+00:00

Do you honestly think this is the best place to ask? You should decide this yourself, or ask someone you're close to that you can trust will give you good advice. Not strangers.

capt-next-a-hoe · 2015-06-29T22:41:40+00:00

If she's genuinely over it, and it seems so to me since the bulk of her CC riding was from 17-23 and its been 5 years, then I don't see why you should doubt her.

But it's only been 1.5 years, who knows if she will lose interest (cuz of her high sex drive). My RP advice is to keep boosting your SMV and soft dread (be so desirable, she won't have a reason to shop around).

Atlas_B_Shruggin · 2015-06-29T23:34:50+00:00

Are you planning to marry her and have kids with her?

TRPlurk15 · 2015-06-29T22:49:46+00:00

You can either give her a chance or not . It's up to you to decide .

Currently, she's very open with me, is open to a variety of sexual acts (so for RPers, she's not withholding sex or refusing to perform any sexual acts.)

Good.

She has a high sex drive (higher than mine actually) with me.

Why exactly is that bad ? Would you rather be in a dead bedroom situation because your gf has a lower sex drive than you ?

She's not proud of her past and just wants to move on with her life.

Some people can actually move on with their lives , but it's up to you to decide . Why are we supposed to tell you what to do ?

[deleted] · 2015-06-29T23:07:35+00:00

personally, it doesn't sound like something you should worry about. she was honest, it's in her past (judging from what she said) and it sounds like you guys have a good thing.

buartha · 2015-06-29T23:42:47+00:00

It sounds like logically everything is fine. Even some RPers would say that they only see previous sexual behaviour as one of many potential red flags, so if you're a year and a half into a relationship and everything's going well there's no need to worry. How did the orgy come up anyway? Did you ask her about group sex specifically or did she randomly confess to you?

Do you have any feelings about it beyond worrying about it affecting the rest of your relationship? It sounds like you might be a bit uncomfortable with it. That's fine, and it's not necessarily a death knell for the relationship if you are initially, but if you do have any emotional reaction to it it's probably best to accept how you feel and think through it now rather than bury it and have it come out as resentment further down the line.

cxj · 2015-06-30T15:46:56+00:00

sexual orgy

What kind of orgy? Multiple guys on a girl or multiple girls on a guy? The former is a gangbang, the latter a threesome.

Tbh it sounds like this girl is being fairly honest with you, has moved past that life, and most importantly regrets it. imo the red flags can be cleared.

Whats left is how you feel about this and whether you think you can get over it, or do better. If you really think this is going to continue to bother you, you should break up with your gf because you are wasting both of your time. Also, do you think you could get a girl of the same level of hotness, sexual willingness, and compatibility, but with a lower p count? If so then by all means go for it. I personally would prefer the hotter, more sexually willing girl with a slut past over the less hot, less willing girl with a low p count, but I've probably fucked about as many girls as your ex and I think I just care less about p count than the average guy does.

Imo you need to assess what you value in a gf and prioritize accordingly.

[deleted] · 2015-06-30T17:55:08+00:00

I think that this is a concern that you have to discuss with your GF along with the underlying theory.

Amethhyst · 2015-07-01T15:37:01+00:00

If you're having doubts about this issue, and you have a strong relationship otherwise (and it sounds like you do), it might be a good idea to just talk to her about them. Getting an open discussion going might help you both come to terms with the issue. Aim to understand why she didn't feel she wanted to tell you. It might help you see her reasoning; or it might make you realise that you don't like that reasoning - that's all you have to decide. I wouldn't assume anything off the bat if she's given you no other reason to doubt her. Everyone has a past - but if this is truly something you think she reasonably should have told you, let her know her omission bothers you. Whatever you do, don't have a internal conversation with yourself and convince yourself that she's a lying cheating whore; we all do things we regret when we're 18 and your SO is no exception. Personally, I don't think this omission makes her automatically untrustworthy; but again, that's up to you decide when you know more information.

max_peenor · 2015-06-29T23:19:36+00:00

she didn't enjoy it.

The hamster is strong with this one.

But a large majority of it was when she was younger (17-23 years old).

There is no such thing as a reformed slut. That said, twenty is practically virginal for some places.

Christian_Kong · 2015-06-30T01:39:40+00:00

20 partners is pretty average for a mid 20's girl(USA, college aged).

When it comes to people talking about their N count in all honestly you can't really believe any number you get because if someone wants to lie(in either direction) they can and you wont be the wiser. If you want to be at peace its something you cant dwell on.

Im more of the type to judge people based on their pasts but thats just me(sometimes a bad trait). Assume shes just a regular woman until you have reason to believe so othewise.

ERockEfreedom · 2015-06-30T05:56:31+00:00

I think your problem is you gotta stop with the Pills. Stop thinking about life through RP/BP. Just live life through you. It will make it all a lot clearer and nicer for you.

Kill_Your_Ego · 2015-06-30T02:41:40+00:00

Right now her partner count ensures that she's been alpha widowed. Which is fine. You'll never be her best but you're good enough. Just don't get her up on a pedestal. Not ever. Not only will you start making dumb ass decisions but you'll also become horribly unattractive.

Don't get married because that's just a really really bad contact. I'm not going to feel bad for you now because I just straight up told you. Don't get married.

No reason you can't have a great LTR though. Keep working on yourself and your mission, keep in good shape, run dread game when necessary and always either be cheating on her or make sure that you could really quick. Natural abundance mentality and you can try to harness pre selection.

Don't turn into a beta! She'll shit test you to turn you into a beta. Don't listen to the bucket crabs! Be her rock. Let her crash into you and then take control.

despisedlove2 · 2015-06-30T04:02:26+00:00

Sounds a bit like my stbx wife.

She is bad news. Avoid her. You will come to regret your choice.

norstar1 · 2015-07-01T03:36:01+00:00

She has been through the CC. If you're considering taking this to the level of marriage, then you're shooting yourself in the foot.

[deleted] · 2015-06-30T20:26:59+00:00

People usually go through experimentation with things like this to find out their likes and dislikes, and their own beliefs, and it's not relevant at all to your future. It strikes me as absurd to even consider ending a relationship over this, but in my mind, it would be similar to ending a healthy relationship because your SO tried out veganism for a year in high school.

[deleted] · 2015-07-01T04:13:55+00:00

1) Does she make you happy? 2) Do you trust her?

That's all you should worry about.

Title	[Advice/Discussion] Should I be worried about my GF's sexual history?
Author	TRPlurk15
Upvotes	2
Comments	87
Date	June 29, 2015 10:34 PM UTC (11 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/3bkb0z/advicediscussion_should_i_be_worried_about_my_gfs/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/advicediscussion-should-i-be-worried-about-my-gfs.281337 https://theredarchive.com/post/281337

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