How and when does RP accept fault when a woman cheats on them?

exit_sandman · 2014-12-03T15:43:03+00:00

It seems from the RP thread a lot of dating stuff teaches that all women are sluts and if they cheat on you with another guy he was more alpha than you and its not your fault because thats the nature of women.

Well, it kinda is your fault, if only for not being alpha enough.

If you want it without the lingo: your partner should be genuinely attracted to you, and ideally be attracted to you most. As long as she's really attracted to you, her cheating on you isn't really a risk unless you picked a woman without morals and/or self control - not every woman will throw herself at another opportunity, even if that opportunity happens to be even more to her liking than you. However, once she isn't really attracted to you (any longer), her straying or breaking up becomes a considerable risk unless you picked a woman with very strict morals and/or self control; and even then it won't be a happy relationship.

How much your fault cheating would be ultimately burns down to how reasonable her expectations in you are (even a redpiller won't expect a woman to stick to a slacker and overall lowlife, though they will question why she ended up with him in the first place) and how carefully you were when choosing your partner.

SirNemesis · 2014-12-03T15:44:53+00:00

Its RP 101 that a woman cheats because the man doesn't maintain attraction and frame (or fails to instill fear, but the beta reddit nyerds tend to shy away from that reality because theyre scared of what meanie reddit women will think of them)

Aerobus · 2014-12-03T15:51:17+00:00

BP: Cheater is at fault

RP: Person cheated on is at fault for not being good enough.

That's essentially the mentality we have. Sure, the cheater is still a slut, but the cheated didn't prove his value properly. Hence, the advice we have for someone cheated is to hit the gym. In other words, if a guy gets cheated on, we instruct him to increase his value.

relationshipdownvote · 2014-12-03T15:30:48+00:00

I would say that BP tends to place all of the fault on the cheater for cheating. I don't think that's neccesarily wrong, because the cheater did make a coincious decision to cheat. RP, having some degree of focus towards self improvement, might also focus on what you could have done better to prevent her from considering cheating on you. It might also attempt to examine what motivation the woman might have for cheating and why she chose to do it (ex. AFBB), rather than simply saying "she did it because she's a bad person".

[deleted] · 2014-12-03T16:34:48+00:00

RP states it's your fault that she cheated cause you weren't good enough. The AWALT part is saying that if a better option than you comes along then the clock has started ticking.

LeGrandDiableBlanc · 2014-12-03T17:46:20+00:00

A relatively common maxim repeated on TRP (it should be more often in my opinion) is that, “It’s your fault.”

Most things that happen in a relationship such that the relationship fails are ultimately the man’s fault (really by nature of the fact that men mostly have to initiate relationships). The flip side of this is that it is a man’s responsibility to essentially keep the relationship exciting single handedly. Another example is that if you stay in a shitty relationship, again, it’s your fault. You aren’t leaving when you should.

The man at fault almost always chose a shitty mate to begin with, is not sexually attractive enough, puts an emotional burden on his lover, fails to set boundaries, or fails to leave the relationship even though it is shitty. We can debate whether or not it is the man’s fault 100% of the time. Most of this applies equally to individual women. The point is to be empowering for the person who has the problem. By taking responsibility, you also grant yourself the power to rectify the problem. 'With great power comes great responsibility', however it is also true that responsibility begets power.

In a way, this is my primary issue with modern Feminism. They provide countless examples of many issues that are legitimate, but ultimately they then whine and strategize ways to make everyone else fix the problems. If they were truly empowered people, they would solve their own problems.

Tired of video games with shitty female characters? Make a fucking video game however you like it. Tired of guys hitting on you? Take measures to draw less attention to yourself. Do you feel scared and powerless against violence? Take a martial art and arm yourself… the list goes on.

This isn’t victim blaming. Saying that there are things you can do to decrease the amount of shitty things that happen to you doesn’t mean that you deserve the shitty things that do happen to you. Am I victim blaming my friends when I advise them to wear a rain jacket in the rain?

Any man who blames women for his problems is still plugged in.

AFormidableContender · 2014-12-03T20:58:08+00:00

I am actually in disagreement with pretty much all RedPills commenting on this issue and I believe this is a logical inconsistency with TRP in general, and anyone who knows me knows if there's one thing I hate, it's people being willfully inconsistent in their belief structures.

I would suggest if a woman cheats on you, it is most certainly not the fault of the man being cheated on. Tangentially yes, if she cheats, she is likely doing it because the male waivered in his masculinity, but to place blame on the man and man alone comes full circle into putting the pussy back on the pedestal and devolving back into white knightism.

To say AWALT therefore a cheating woman is the failure of the man is essentially to declare that you believe women are so derpy and so infantalized and so inhuman that the failings of women are essentially the failing of men which is ridiculous and strikes at the heart of pretty much everything TRP stands for, at least in my opinion.

If on one hand we as TRP are going to say TRP is about learning what it is to be a man, how to be masculine, and how to take responsibility for your failings, we can't, on the other hand, claim that the failings of women are our responsibility. I as a man, do not wish to associate with those who either scorn self improvement, don't take responsibility for their actions, or carry themselves in morally reprehensible or "honourless" fashions. The entire point of taking pride in being a man is taking pride having honour, doing the right thing, being able to enjoy the company and value of others without viewing other people exclusively as walking value propositions as women do. If a woman cheats on me, fair enough...maybe I wasn't masculine enough, or a better alpha male came by. Whatever, that's how women are, but I'm certainly not taking responsibility for her inability to go "yo, I found someone better. Sorry. Have a nice life" before sucking someone else's dick, and if you do. I'd strongly suggest you reevaluate how alpha you really think you are. Women may be a pitiful collection of creatures, but i'm not Nice Guy^tm enough to think their lack of self respect, dignity, or human decency is on me.

This is the kind of behavior that allows women to continue acting like this and not be held to any sort of standard in our culture and it's part of the reason feminism is so successful in dismantling and destroying men and masculinity; by leveraging concepts of female infantalism and victimhood complex which men allow them to have.

Furthermore, I think the idea that a cheating woman is the fault of her male SO is attractive to some RPs because they like the idea that if a woman doesn't cheat, obviously it means he's the greatest ever, and fuck every other guy, which is obviously not the case. He could have just as easily found a woman who's not a giant shithead (they do exist, though rare). I think it's the TRP circlejerk to watch all these guys get cheated on and think "LOL, LOOK AT THESE CHODES...IMMA NOT GET CHEATED ON CUZ IMMA BE SUUU ALFA! THE MOST ALFAEST OF ALFA" and while as a redpill man I encourage and praise self improvement always, but only 20% of the population gets to be alpha. If you think you're going to make that 20%, good luck with that, but there's always a bigger fish...

lxnarratorxl · 2014-12-04T16:35:41+00:00

Personal accountability. If I choose to enter a relationship with someone, then I have accepted the risk of being cheated on. Also, if I am not attractive enough to her overall that she has desires for someone else and acts on them then I should have improved myself more so that didn't happen. If I am cheated on then I will cut that person from my life, but I will accept responsibility for the failure of my relationship. Relationships are teams, if your team loses it's not just one person's fault it's the teams fault.

ExpendableOne · 2014-12-04T20:19:08+00:00

If a woman cheats on a man, that is 100% her fault for cheating. If she wasn't happy with the relationship then it really comes down to two choices. Either she communicates and tries to resolve the issues(this means working with the guy to get him closer to where she wants to be or working on herself to resolve her own issues, entitlements or unhealthy/unrealistic expectations she might have), or she stays honest with the guy and breaks it off. If she didn't have faith in the relationship, than that's either an error in her judgement or her responsibility to deal with it. Same principle applies if the genders were reversed.

sh1v · 2014-12-04T08:13:58+00:00

There's a thin line between learning what you might have done better, and beating yourself up and taking all the blame for someone else's dumbass move. I mean, we learned never to let the holocaust happen again, but that doesn't mean it was our fault.

Title	How and when does RP accept fault when a woman cheats on them?
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	1
Comments	55
Date	December 3, 2014 3:25 PM UTC (11 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/2o5ri8/how_and_when_does_rp_accept_fault_when_a_woman/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/how-and-when-does-rp-accept-fault-when-a-woman.284206 https://theredarchive.com/post/284206

Comments