Last night my LTR watched a TED talk on relationships and is now telling me she's paranoid because she thinks she is "supposed to" dump me, but she says doesn't personally want to. The woman in the video discusses "red flags" and how women become "blinded" to them by love. My LTR is worried that I might have some of these "red flags" though she didn't point to any in particular when I asked, other than that I'm too critical of her (this occurs when I pass her shit tests, sometimes with pressure flips).

So I told her, OK, I think you should explore a little and date some other guys so you can get a better sense of what "red flags" I might have. (It's her first relationship and mine too.) She said "no, I want to keep going, I don't want the relationship to end, wah." I offered to set her up with my friend, in exchange for her setting me up with her HB8 friend, so that we could both "explore a little" (I kind of want to fuck her friend) and she said "but that would be like giving up." She nevertheless said she wasn't sure where to go from here. I told her last night: OK, take some time to do research tomorrow and figure out whether you feel you really are "supposed to" be in this relationship. She'll get back to me later tonight, probably 11 or 12.

What the fuck is going on here? What am I doing wrong? Must I now dump her to save my pride/emotions and beat her to the punch? I do not want to but I have no idea what the fuck is going on in her head. Is this a deal breaker and she be demoted to plate?

Also the woman in the video basically bashes "toxic men" the whole time and is married to another chick. The comment section is full of CC'ers talking about how glad they were that they dumped their "toxic" boyfriends.