Pay attention to the things they do early on that show you how they perceive you

cherieblosum · 2020-01-23T11:42:27+00:00

Same thing happened to me before. Guy seemed so normal and sweet on text. He drove 4 hours over to see me. I actually did not ask him what his plans for the night were because I thought he'd arrange something for himself (young and naive then).

After the date, which was short and sucked, he tried to pressure me to let him in my apartment. I was so shocked! I didn't let him and he left pissed. Next day he doesn't text me at all. Stupidly I text him and ask him how he's doing, and he goes into this whole thing about how he doesn't think I'm serious about finding a relationship.

Dude, bro, I was the one who wanted the relationship. You're the one who tried to fuck on the first night.

ceramicunicorn · 2020-01-23T13:48:00+00:00

Posts like this make me feel so tired. Like how do you not feel tired. I don’t know. Maybe this same thing has to happen to you like 50+ times before you’re so worn down from male entitlement to sex, hearing about their insatiable “needs” (wants), all that must be gratified NOW, being thrown in your face, again, and again, and again- before you give up.

ItsAnonCat · 2020-01-23T14:07:32+00:00

I hate this so much, I’ve had guys who only live 45 minutes away from me act like it’s gonna be a vacation and they need to stay for days. Like wtf? It’s just a date.

purasangria · 2020-01-23T16:51:49+00:00

I used to think that I was the only one that men tried shit like this with, and I'm so glad that I found this sub bc now I realize that ALL WOMEN are being treated like this, it's not that there is something wrong with me...

ruby_radmuppet · 2020-01-23T14:53:23+00:00

Hahaha so... I have to share this story from when I was a teenager and chatted up strangers online.

I had gotten to know some guy a few states over. We both liked reading and poetry and he would send me books sometimes. Of course we end up chatting about meeting up, and he decides he's going to come to my state. I'm like "cool."

He doesn't make any plans with me so until he basically shows up on my block ("how do I find your house?") I don't really have any idea what to expect.

Turns out he was hoping I'd let him sleep over.... and he didn't realize I still lived with my (very strict, no boys in your room) parents. I told him he couldn't stay and he pulled this out: "but where will I sleep?!"

And I knew I'd be worse off sneaking him into my house than anything else so I just shrugged, told him he'd have to figure it out, just as he figured out how to drive here and find my house.

He slept in his car that night and a motel the next before heading back home without so much as a kiss. (I found him unattractive and smelly in person.) He stopped sending me books after that, LOL.

Radtron3000 · 2020-01-23T18:46:25+00:00

Good for you. You aren't a hotel and he's not entitled to sex.

PrettyCicada · 2020-01-23T08:45:27+00:00

You should have asked him to get an AirBnB, waited until he paid for it, and *then* blocked him. I know it's petty but making fuckboys suffer for wasting your time is cathartic as hell.

dackaroo · 2020-01-24T03:25:21+00:00

Once you stop expecting that men are just like us, all their motivations and machinations become painfully obvious.

Title	Pay attention to the things they do early on that show you how they perceive you
Author	thebarsunderthefloor
Upvotes	112
Comments	19
Date	January 23, 2020 8:39 AM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/esqcvl/pay_attention_to_the_things_they_do_early_on_that/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/pay-attention-to-the-things-they-do-early-on-that.684192 https://theredarchive.com/post/684192

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