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Being direct can be a good thing

nicethingyoucanthave
October 11, 2013
84 upvotes
/r/TheRedPill
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Post Information
Title Being direct can be a good thing
Author

nicethingyoucanthave
Upvotes 84
Comments 45
Date October 11, 2013 8:57 PM UTC
(12 years ago)
Subreddit Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/1o8xb8/being_direct_can_be_a_good_thing/
Archive Link https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/being-direct-can-be-a-good-thing.7176
https://theredarchive.com/post/7176
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Comments

[–]poiurewq57 points 12 years ago* [recovered] (3 children) | Copy Link

to be honest, it had nothing to do with your directness. your overall execution was just masterfully done.

[–]jcslzr 16 points17 points18 points 12 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

no, I think she just wants to fuck the other girl ex.

[–][deleted] 12 years ago* (1 child) | Copy Link

[permanently deleted]

[–]ComplainyGuy 1 point2 points3 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

You know they ARE people behind this psych and game. Perhaps its both. or neither. or a little of one and something else he hasn't told us. all we know is he played well

[–]cbarrett1989 28 points29 points30 points 12 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

Not bad. I liked that. Just blurt it out and see where it goes. Worst that happens is you don't get laid and you move on, best thing to happen is you're getting laid.

[–][deleted] 10 points11 points12 points 12 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

And worst thing is your expectation is known and not reciprocated, saving you lots of time. W00T W00T!

[–]VinylGuy420 2 points3 points4 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

...and money.

[–]md619 18 points19 points20 points 12 years ago* (3 children) | Copy Link

Honestly it sounds like up in till the point with the bumper sticker, things weren't going great. Usually just putting it out there like you did usually isn't a great idea unless you're really congruent about it because it basically sends her ASD into overdrive (what she calls awkward) and kills any chance of her just hamstering her way into you guys having sex (oh it just happened!).

That being said if you weren't making your desire to bang her clear on a subtle basis (holding eye contact, kino, etc.) then it's better than just being labeled as a non-sexual entity in her mind.

Oh and you definitely did the right thing by playing it confident after you put it out there. If you were to start apologizing and backing down you probably would have lost any chance to bang her.

You should do a follow up FR tomorrow.

[–]16 TRP VanguardTRPsubmitter 3 points4 points5 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Honestly it sounds like up in till the point with the bumper sticker, things weren't going great.

I agree. I was really put off by her a) not giving out her number, b) arriving late for dinner, c) saying "maybe" about his band invitation. All indicators that she is flaky and gets off on attention from guys.

But awesome that OP just changed it up at the end there. Throwing out the sex part WITH humor and confidence. Body language too. She then continued to test him and when he passed, she relented.

I second the second FR tomorrow

[–]TRP Vanguardnicethingyoucanthave[S] 2 points3 points4 points 12 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

it sounds like up in till the point with the bumper sticker, things weren't going great.

It kept flip-flopping back and forth. When we met, I was looking for my buddy, and as I'm standing in the door scanning the room, I see her staring right at me. I did a double-take, like "holy shit is that hot girl looking right at me?" So right at the start, I thought she had found me attractive.

But then she was with a friend, some lady she works with I think, who was just insufferable. There were also parts of the conversation that I just fumbled. The number thing was disappointing - she told me last night that what she'd meant to say was that we should do the facebook thing instead of texting. I guess that makes sense, but at the time, I took it as a sign that I was out of the running.

On the other hand, she was getting all my jokes. One in particular, after my friend arrived and joined us, she nearly spit her drink she laughed so hard. And she playfully hit my arm, which is a good sign.

It was like that. Some things went well and others not so much. Regardless, she obviously likes me, and we had a great time last night and this morning. We're meeting up again tonight.

Usually just putting it out there like you did usually isn't a great idea unless you're really congruent about it

I agree. The TRP aspect of this, for me, is two-fold: (1) in the past I wouldn't have thought about the negative consequences of answering her question. The truth is, that sorority girl and I dated for like a month and then she moved on to another guy. In the past, I might have blurted that out - basically, I might have talked myself down. TRP has taught me not to do that. (2) having accidentally said what everybody was thinking, in the past I might have backed down from it, apologized, or whatever.

Anyway, this looks to be a pretty good deal. I was up front with her that I have a date set up next week. She said that's fine because she's "not looking for anything serious" - part of me wants to tell her that she really should be looking for something serious at her age, but hey, I'm not her mom.

[–]md619 0 points1 point2 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

It was like that. Some things went well and others not so much. Regardless, she obviously likes me, and we had a great time last night and this morning. We're meeting up again tonight.

Yeah we all have those nights. Usually the more time she's invested in you the more she's willing to forgive a few fuckups and since you obviously closed the deal in the end it sounds like you were alright.

In the past, I might have blurted that out - basically, I might have talked myself down. TRP has taught me not to do that. (2) having accidentally said what everybody was thinking, in the past I might have backed down from it, apologized, or whatever.

Yup. It's amazing how even guys I know that are usually fairly alpha don't seem to get this. Blue pill conditioning is powerful.

Anyway, this looks to be a pretty good deal. I was up front with her that I have a date set up next week. She said that's fine because she's "not looking for anything serious" - part of me wants to tell her that she really should be looking for something serious at her age, but hey, I'm not her mom.

Definitely don't tell her. No reason to sabotage a perfectly good plate if you don't have to and she's an "adult" capable of her own decisions.

[–]duglock 3 points4 points5 points 12 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

I've had luck just walking up to girl after girl in the bar and saying "Want to go back to my place and fuck?". I've only had that not work once or twice. You might have to ask 20-30 girls but one will look at you for a second or two and they go "Okay".

I did it once when I was really drunk on a dare from friends and was surprised when the first girl I asked said yes. Do it all the time now.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Dude, I'm definitely going to try this. I'm all for ultra ballsy stuff during night game when people are loose.

What is the exact wording you used?

[–]steadymotion 2 points3 points4 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Cool OP. Best of luck tonight.

[–]my_cock_in_barack 2 points3 points4 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

"I don't like to give out names"

[–]B_Campbell 2 points3 points4 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Well played, sir!

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points4 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

As cool and enlightening as the idea of being direct is (and how important it was that you stayed poised after you dropped the bomb)...she had already made the decision when she showed up at lunch. "Is he cool, or will he fuck it up?"

Congrats on not fucking it up.

[–]Ommin 2 points3 points4 points 12 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

A girl I had on the back shelf with some slow game, told me she was moving. The last time I went to her house I told her I wanted to have her right there on the floor. After a few moments she said she had to get going (we really did, she had a special job to get to).

She's since moved back, and hit me up right away to hang out again and seems very eager. As someone else said, at worst they know your intentions, at best, they know your intentions!

[–]redbluepilling 1 point2 points3 points 12 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link

A few years back, I randomly happened to message a girl on fb that I met/kissed once a year before. It turns out she was moving the next day across the country. We set up plans for lunch.

We had a good time, but I failed to escalate things (even sitting on the couch watching tv for an hour...so bad). I left and went to my friend's place close by. After a few hours, I messaged her something to the effect of:

RBP: What do you prefer? Apples or Oranges

Her: Apples why?

RBP: What do you prefer? Sex in a car or in a plane?

Her: Car I guess lol

RBP: What do prefer? Sex with me right now or... never.

Her: Now.

RBP: I'll see you soon.

So yeah, even if you fuck up, you have nothing to lose--it's always worth it to be direct. At some point they saw you as having value, it clearly dropped, but it can still spike right back up if you're not completely incongruent.

[–]Remerez 2 points3 points4 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

I had sex with a lesbian texting the words "I want you". she said she commended after the sexy time for my bravery and that she has never had somebody be so straight forward. In a world of games sometimes the direct path is king.

[–]fr1ction 2 points3 points4 points 12 years ago (8 children) | Copy Link

Her: it'll probably be 7:30

Is this a shit test? Seems like she might be pushing a bit here, testing the waters maybe?

[–][deleted] 9 points10 points11 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

sex before dinner

[–][deleted] 9 points10 points11 points 12 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link

Why would her showing a willingness to get over to your place faster be a shit test?

[–]1mrust 2 points3 points4 points 12 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

It's a power play. If someone invites you over for dinner at a particular time, you don't come half an hour earlier. She wanted to see how accommodating he would be. May not matter in the long run, but a hoop or some teasing would be appropriate.

Just not sure which direction to go since some may backfire:

  • accuse her of being eager
  • tell her to bring some ingredient, etc...
  • "cool, then you can help with prep. I'll put you to work."

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points1 point 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

You could reverse it with a compliance test of your own... since she is coming from a workout:

You won't be able to make it here by 1930 because you'll need to shower. I want you smelling nice, after all.

[–]fr1ction 1 point2 points3 points 12 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

The only hypothetical situation that comes to mind would be seeing if he was with someone else before 8? I really don't know it was an honest question; pretty new and can't immediately recognize shit tests in general.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points4 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

I was asking to see if I had overlooked something obvious, no worries!

[–]TRP Vanguardnicethingyoucanthave[S] 2 points3 points4 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Is this a shit test?

Nah. She had said that her class got out at 6:30. She was just letting me know that she wasn't coming to my house straight from the gym. She went home and showered and changed (and in her words, "I had to shave my hoo ha") lol.

[–]bigyellowtwinki 1 point2 points3 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

I've also noticed that showing utterly no fear of other people is pretty effective, especially when they are out of control.

[–]Doomsday_ 1 point2 points3 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

This is an excellent example of the power of "Mode One" behaviour--expressing your sexual intentions with women confidently and directly. This forces her to make a decision about whether or not to accept your advances, and saves you from wasting your time pursuing a chick who isn't interested.

[–]3MinuteHero7 points 12 years ago* [recovered] (7 children) | Copy Link

Not intentionally trying to shatter you, but I don't like this chick. She comes off as dominating and already has you doing a lot more than she's doing. She's already got you on her schedule numerous times. In fact, now that I think of it...she does a lot of the stuff I see being advised in this sub.

Interesting!

[–]rexregnum10 points11 points12 points 12 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

I wouldn't go so far as to say she's dominant, she just has her own life and is skeptical of new guys. She's not going to immediately accommodate a guy she just met into her life by changing it. It's a girl who just has an ounce more maturity than the average chick and has to be handled more directly. He handled this perfectly and got her to be just as logical and up front as he is.

I would say the 7:30 thing is a potential shit test, but is just as much a sign that she's eager to get there early and take care of what they've been planning to do. If I were OP I'd make something that can sit out so he immediately start making a move when she arrives. Girl did finish up a Pilate's class... plus she already knows what the deal is and wants to get there early. You've already eaten with her once, I wouldn't delay any longer with the situation the two of you are in

[–]Bringyourfugshiz 0 points1 point2 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

plus all that banging will make you even hungrier

[–]SterBlich -1 points0 points1 point 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

or maybe 7:30 cuz she doesnt have shit to do until 8...

overthinking guys, chill a bit

[–]TRP Vanguardnicethingyoucanthave[S] 17 points18 points19 points 12 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

doing a lot more than she's doing

In what magical world do men not pursue women?

on her schedule numerous times

She was late one time. She works at the courthouse. It's understandable.

She has a class tonight. It's unreasonable to think she'd skip it.

You may have unreasonable standards about this

[–]AlmostRP 8 points9 points10 points 12 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

I'd at least throw in a compliance test in. Tell her you like lacy panties.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points4 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Wear Blue

[–]3MinuteHero-3 points 12 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

I'm cool with my unreasonable standards.

[–]x7CR7x 1 point2 points3 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

This is beautiful execution.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Fuckin' bravo, man.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

post updates

[–][deleted] 12 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[permanently deleted]

[–]TRP Vanguardnicethingyoucanthave[S] 10 points11 points12 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

That's it really. She's a cool girl. Pretty typical. Want to hear some things that will make TRPers laugh?

In her words, she's "not looking for anything serious." She's 29. She told me this before we fucked, because I wanted to make sure there was an understanding between us. Part of me just wanted to sit her down and explain to her that she was making a mistake, right now, with me. But you know what, she wouldn't believe me anyway.

She lives with an ex-boyfriend. Yeah. They became "good friends" so she never moved out when they broke up. His girlfriend is okay with it.

At 22, she dated a forty-year-old and "you kind of remind me of him." Yeah, I'm not not 40. Not yet. "Thanks a fucking lot" I said. She had meant it as a compliment, she claims. "It's not appearance, it's the way you act."

When she arrived at the house, I told her that we had to make out for a while. I said, "look, if you're not a good kisser then I'm not going to bother cooking, we'll just get take out" - she thought it was funny, and it got us down to business. I tried to pause a couple of times so that we could eat, but we would just talk for a couple of minutes, then go a little further. We ended up fucking. It was pretty good.

I cooked something simple and we had a nice conversation. She claimed to have no kinks. None at all. Right. I told her some things I like, and everything I named, she was like, "sure that sounds cool. I'd try that." I'm just rolling my eyes here. Don't know why she can't just be honest - I wasn't judgmental.

We sat on the couch, still talking about sex, and I asked her if she'd ever kissed a girl. "no." Does it turn you on when you see girls kissing? "Sometimes. I'm not really sure." So, I put some lesbian porn on the TV. We fucked again. She was very clearly turned on.

We laid down for a while, didn't feel like going to see that band. Decided to go to a nearby pub just to get out of the house. She put her dress on and I told her that I have a strict "no panty" rule for my car. She went along with it - she definitely seems to like that kind of flirting.

We get along well and she's easy to talk to, except that she wouldn't really volunteer much with regard to sex. If I'm leading, she's following. But she's not offering any guidance. I'm okay with that.

We only went to the one place. Struck up a conversation with some random couple and played darts with them. Then me and the other guy played pool and the ladies sat at the bar. A couple of guys started talking to them. I texted her to show a little more leg, then winked at her when she looked up after reading it.

That turned her on apparently. We went out back and made out until some people came to smoke.

Back home around midnight. Fucked her in the shower. Morning sex, then waffles. Went to a park for a walk. She left from there to meet a friend for lunch

oh, get this! This friend of hers texted her around 8:00. We were just starting to get hot and heavy, so she ignored it. When we moved to the bedroom, she couldn't hear the phone anymore and the friend kept texting then eventually started calling. After we fucked the first time, she called her back and I heard part of it: "he's fine. everything is fine. don't worry!"

lol.

[–]FortunateBum 0 points1 point2 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

THAT'A BOY!!!

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Masters class level shit, dude. From top to bottom. Congrats.

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