I have a friend, who's gay. I met him a few years ago as part of a particular friend group. Everyone loves him, and so do I. I have heard nothing but good things about him, and I've never had a reason to distrust him. So, pre-pandemic, we hung out and he told me that a straight, white, married Boomer man of our group had declared in a conversation among them, that I'm a lesbian. I'm not a lesbian, not that there's anything wrong with that but I have been dyke-baited, queer-baited my whole life. And this was a totally different level.

The fucking audacity. I'm an acquaintance at best, and have never told him a single detail about my person like or sexual orientation. Yet, he was, a group, insisting that I'm a lesbian.

I got my shot, and as things open up, I have been thinking a lot about what I'm going to say to him when I have the chance. My first rule, not call names, but I would really like to slap a b*tch.