There have been many ways to describe why men should be in the gym training. I want to emphasize what you just read. There have been many ways to describe why men should be in the gym training.

Not working out. Not exercising. There's a key difference between training and all that other stuff. When you train you deliberately push yourself to be better, to increase skill, athleticism, ability, all of it. You are pushing it every day, breaking down, rebuilding all the way.

When you exercise or any other version thereof you are just trying to maintain your health, preserve ability, which is a fine goal yet it isn't the purpose of what you are to be doing here. Running doesn't make you better at anything other than...well...running.

Experienced lifters know that nothing can fry your nervous system like heavy loads. At a certain point it's no longer about being jacked or mass but its about nerve activation. That’s why, in powerlifting, lifters alter their lifts from the standard bench, squat, deadlift. They change it up. Rotate the types of bench they do and have a cycle they follow. Having a good recovery plan is vitally important. A big key in keeping your CNS happy is the appropriate use of variety, but first you need to get your mind right.

I have often said the deadlift is the most emotional lift of the Big Three. It's the baseline of the strength lifts. A good deadlift can tell you a lot about your raw power, but it comes at a cost. Nothing can fry your nervous system like heavy deadlift. It is an emotional vampire.

When it comes down to it, you have to find some way to make the part of you that wants a bigger lift, to be a better man, husband, father, and overall better LIFE, than the part of you that doesn’t want it. You have to get set and lift it.

It's about your mindset, overcoming negative talk. All that "I'm a pussy let me have it", "My wife yelled at me, what did I do wrong", "she this", "She that". You can't blame the bar when you can't lift it. You know your wife is already going to be pushing you. Why let her? She knows your weaknesses, so does the bar at the gym. If you have a training plan every day you get a little stronger, little better than you were the day before.

That being the case, it’s especially critical that you optimize your training environment, and even more specifically, your emotional climate, prior to a serious pulling session. Negative talk, years of thinking you can't do it, can't be better...You have to overcome it.

When I get on the platform for a meet I have to maintain emotional control. The crowd, judges, lights. no matter how many lifts I have it is this moment I cannot practice for. I can train and train how to bench, deadlift, squat. Set up multiple times, but I cannot be prepared for the moment I walk up to a different bench, different monolith. 3 judges that have never seen me before. No one cares just last week I have a pinched nerve, no one cares that I struggle on lift off. She doesn't care that you are sick, that you had a hard day at work. I have to have developed the ability to control my emotions during my lifts. By ’emotional control’ I mean two things:

The first is that you cannot have anger or discouragement. You have to overcome these. Preparing for a new PR, or walking into the house finding her upset at you; either way these emotions hurt you. They drag you down and will breed doubt, despair. Your mind wants to protect you. It will find the easy way out and it will listen to these negative thoughts. It will bring up every situation in which you have failed. Remind you why it's just better to sit on the couch eating Doritos and getting her coffee and drinks when she tells you to.

The second is that you need to create emotions that are helpful to you, like aggression, excitement, and optimism. Most people let their emotions be influenced by what’s happening during an event. If they’re performing poorly on the field, their emotions go down, and their game tends to follow. Coming here and talking about how pathetic you are, how much of a beta you are. We know this. Otherwise you wouldn't have been here. Is it really important? Gather you mind together, start controlling all that vitriol. Reminding yourself of these past things will bring you down and keep you there.

Great athletes don’t let their emotions be determined by what’s happening on the field. Just as you shouldn't let your wife control your emotional stability. Athletes use the emotional energy, but instead of giving in to the negative they’re trying to create a positive emotional state. Maintaining emotional control is one of the keys to winning.

This is why you train. You are not just exercising, not just getting in shape.

Every lift is forming your emotional control.