Are Men Ever Really Intimidated by a Woman?

Droi · 2014-05-16T17:05:21+00:00

I like how women who never need to put themselves in that vulnerable position judge ALL men so easily. You never have to risk rejection, you are passive and (in this phase) risk free.

Honestly, it's disgusting.

Just like the dismissal of men's sex drive, the underrating of the fear of approach is just hypocritical. I promise you that the MOST "alpha" guys have had many many times they wanted a girl but didn't approach or didn't make the necessary steps forward. And it could happen because of a million different reasons, just like you don't always get a conversation to go the way you want it, sometimes it just doesn't work out.

Instead, I see things like this being said: "not any man that you'd want to be with" (I promise you that's not true, ask your "alpha" SO if he approached any girl he ever wanted), "But any guy that wants you badly enough will get over it", "seems like a cop out.".

Get off your high horse. Our society usually treats strange men approaching you with a whole range of negative responses, and if you stop your "female solipsism" (that one's for your dana) for a second maybe you could understand that.

Wolfwoodd · 2014-05-16T16:11:12+00:00

Guy here. When I was in college (i.e. young and inexperienced), there was one particular girl that nearly gave me a panic attack every time she was in my general vicinity. My heart rate would rise and I'd start to stutter.

Does that count as intimidated? Now I'm older and much more experienced and this kind of stuff doesn't happen anymore.

I doubt this is the case for most guys. If anything, it's probably fear of rejection that stops guys from asking girls out, not intimidation.

ryeprotagonist · 2014-05-16T15:49:46+00:00

not any man that you'd want to be with...

stillnoturday · 2014-05-16T18:14:05+00:00

Opportunity I think needs to play a role here. Honestly I don't think I've been in a situation where the girl herself was intimidating "like omg she so pretty if I talk to her I'll die" the situation however isn't easy thing to overcome.

Is she with friends? Is she single? What is my risk for rejection and how bad will that rejection be? Decision has to be made as to how worthwhile it would be, why would I trouble myself when tinder is a swipe away. That's honesty.

Now take the same caliber girl and given an opportunity being intimidated shouldn't play a factor. I've gotten rejected before it sucks but it isn't as bad as you build it in your head to be.

I guess what I am trying to say is most guys aren't afraid, they are just picking the battles.

2014-05-16T19:23:59+00:00

Not by women. Probably just intimidated by the idea of rejection and embarrassment.

That being said, the ones intimidated by rejection/embarrassment usually aren't dateable anyway. They need to get over that stuff before properly courting a lady.

ckennington · 2014-05-16T16:26:12+00:00

In the MMSL it talks about approach anxiety. The more attractive the women, the more likely other men are watching his approach. His nervousness comes from a subconscious fear that he's going to get his ass kicked by a competitor. It has less to do with you, and more to do with other men.

blarsen80 · 2014-05-16T18:13:20+00:00

"Intimidation" = I wanna bang the crap out of you, but my self-esteem isn't high enough to risk getting rejected.

Tarnsman4Life · 2014-05-17T02:23:00+00:00

On the one hand some some men are intimidated by a beautiful woman, on the other I see this used all the time by 4's and 5's as the woman version of "she must have been a lesbian" to hamster away why attractive guys don't dig them.

blushing_goddess · 2014-05-16T15:53:26+00:00

I've had guys say that they were intimidated by me. Not because I'm mean or anything, but they think I'm pretty, smart and confident. They said they were nervous.

But any guy that wants you badly enough will get over it.

I wouldn't listen if a girl said "oh, he's just intimidated by you/me" because, well, maybe he's just not into you. Unless I heard it from the guy himself, no one can know that for sure, ya know?

aaron_the_just · 2014-05-16T18:26:43+00:00

That depends. If a guy *really likes a girl, but he knows the likelihood of her wanting to be with him is low, and he's got significant risk or social stigma from being rejected or she's got a husband or boyfriend... no, he's not going to make a move.

Bakerofpie · 2014-05-17T00:09:59+00:00

Yes, some men absolutely can be intimidated by some women and I think it's silly to say it doesn't happen. However, women use this VERY frequently as the standard response to try to make themselves or their friends feel better rather than doing any kind of introspection or considering that they may need to change some of their habits. I would never tell someone a man was just too intimidated by her to get her number because in the end it helps nothing.

greycloud24 · 2014-05-16T17:09:42+00:00

guy here. if a girl is perfect to me i get intimidated. the ones i like most leave me unable to maintain a clear state of mind in their presence. basically i just stop thinking when i am around them. i hate that but it happens anyway. in their presence i am so overwhelmed by joy around them that i cannot think at all and it makes me a worse person. i dated one of those but she had all the power in the relationship because i couldn't have a strait mind around her. in the end she made me a worse person, cheated on me and left.

since then if a woman has that effect on me i just toss her in a category of good to look at, but no good to interact with. some women are so attractive that they make me a worse person. you could call it intimidation, or you could call it me knowing my own limitations.

2014-05-17T05:38:00+00:00

Others already mentioned the fear of embarassment or rejection. But I think there is also the girls who are simply unapproachable. If you are attractive, but look serious or angry, men aren't gonna try. I guess it's less intimidation, and more an understanding that you don't want to be approached.

FleetingWish · 2014-05-16T20:14:01+00:00

No, they aren't. As put by my SO, something that is 5'3" and smells like flowers is not intimidating. What they are doing is making a calculated judgement to avoid certain kinds of women that are going to not be pleasant to be around. Career and combative women are both examples of women who might be unpleasant to be around, and rationalize the fact men are avoiding it by saying that men are intimidated by them. And you guessed right, this is exactly to make themselves feel better. In fact, you can see that by realizing claiming men are intimidated by them is really an attempt to insult and shame men into liking them. It's literally the same content as telling a man "you're scared by a girl". In other words it's an attempt by women to make a man feel emasculated, and make themselves feel superior by extension.

SirNemesis · 2014-05-16T19:10:33+00:00

Men are put off by strong, independent, women, not intimidated.

However, it is possible for a guy to be intimidated by a really good looking woman - but he'll overcome the nerves if she clearly signals her approachability and interest. Bitchy resting face doesn't work here.

Also note that a lot of girls who think they're really good looking are actually just average.

2014-05-16T19:37:41+00:00

"He's intimidated by you"

Translation: "He's repulsed by your bitchiness but we are lying to you to make ourselves feel better."

2014-05-16T17:04:08+00:00

no they arent

miss_goldfish · 2014-05-16T17:39:45+00:00

In high school, I had a huge crush on this soccer player I was in classes with. We flirted a little and I hoped he would ask me to prom, but nope. I heard from mutual friends years later that he really wanted to ask me out but he thought I was too smart for him and that I wouldn't say yes. (He turned out to be a terrible person, so that's for the best).

I wouldn't say he was intimidated by me, more that he didn't think I would think we were a good match. But I guess that's what girls mean sometimes.

2014-05-16T19:12:48+00:00

Here's my take on that. If a girl is saying such, I really don't give it much credence. I have had guys tell me this directly many times, for the longest time. So I do know it's possible but only until told directly. Aaron is spot on, if that is impression they get I probably wasn't interested anyway. There's so much more then that. So to answer you question in a confusing way, and I'm sorry for that. :)

Yeah, sure absolutely. Just not in the situation you described. BetterHalf saw not just those 'intimidating factors' he saw me with my friends, my warmth and love for them. He has flat out said I have a huge heart.

So you're right, if he does really like you he will express such and that's the person you would probably want get to know and explore being with.. the one that sees YOU for YOU.

2014-05-16T21:15:48+00:00

No. Before boys become men, they may be intimidated by the "otherness" of femininity. In a similar way as a dog might be intimidated by water from lack of exposure by living on land most of the time.

Makes no sense. If a man is attracted, he will let his attraction be made known. Unless the situational risk is not favorable due to high cost of rejection (eg loss of social standing).

2014-05-17T01:46:20+00:00

Pretty sure most guys are scared. A guy nowadays fears rejection almost as much as a girl.

2014-05-17T14:12:39+00:00

I suppose that there's been women I've been too afraid to approach or ask out, but on a subconscious level there's always been the reality that its not only out of fear of rejection, but that they don't actually click with me intellectually; and in the past I was desperate enough to ignore that for even a temporary chance at having female companionship. So the answer to the question seems to be yes and no from my point of view.

However, I also think people are intimidated by their own sex drives which can also play into not hitting on the people they like.

2014-05-25T12:29:36+00:00

they go from intimidated, to hurt, to disgusted, to hateful, to pua, to laid. this is the natural progression of a man in modern times.

2014-05-25T20:55:40+00:00

Every man was a little boy at one point and had to obey his mother. If his mother was unstable or manipulative or borderline or any of a host of other traits then he may have the fight, flight or freeze reaction of trauma programmed into him from birth. This is especially true if he was raised by a single mom and did not have his Dad around to provide another adult POV to counterbalance his mother's behavior. So when said little boy grows up, even though he is an adult and may be physically bigger and stronger than any given woman, crazy bitch behavior can trigger him and he can become intimidated

2014-05-16T19:37:19+00:00

"He's intimidated by you"

Translation: "He's repulsed by your bitchiness but we are lying to you to make ourselves feel better."

Bakerofpie · 2014-05-16T22:57:41+00:00

[permanently deleted]

2014-05-19T08:59:56+00:00

I don't think so. Unless she's a 300lb bodybuilder and/or has a weapon or something.

Generally when a woman thinks she is indiminating, she is usually just loud, mean, bitchy and manly.

Men don't find that intimidating.

They just find it unattractive.

Title	Are Men Ever Really Intimidated by a Woman?
Author	tryanotherJuan
Upvotes	12
Comments	63
Date	May 16, 2014 3:48 PM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/25pwxd/are_men_ever_really_intimidated_by_a_woman/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/are-men-ever-really-intimidated-by-a-woman.84503 https://theredarchive.com/post/84503

Comments