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Is this not legally domestic abuse and why have the police not gotten involved? We can't allow abuse by one sex to be legitimised as comical while if done by the opposite sex is controlling and coercive.

Standup4boys

August 27, 2016
285 upvotes
/r/MensRights
https://m.imgur.com/DuB0b4u
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Post Information
Title Is this not legally domestic abuse and why have the police not gotten involved? We can't allow abuse by one sex to be legitimised as comical while if done by the opposite sex is controlling and coercive.
Author

Standup4boys

Upvotes 285
Comments 39
Date August 27, 2016 3:30 PM UTC
(9 years ago)
Subreddit Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/4zuovp/is_this_not_legally_domestic_abuse_and_why_have/
Archive Link https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/is-this-not-legally-domestic-abuse-and-why-have.942822
https://theredarchive.com/post/942822
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Comments

[+][deleted] 9 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link

[permanently deleted]

[–]arellaroth 18 points19 points20 points 9 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

People in mentally abusive and controlling relationships often put up with the abuse due to insecurity/fear/or obliviousness to the fact that it's 'abuse'. He isn't an idiot for following these rules. This isn't the most extreme case of abuse at all. But it's abusive none the less. Albeit, to a very small degree. There's no reason for police to get involved. She isn't breaking any laws. But people should probably encourage him to break up with her. She's clearly controlling and I don't imagine he'd be too happy about it. But this is more of a case of an unhealthy relationship with a controlling asshole. Hope he leaves her.

[–]wisty 3 points4 points5 points 9 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

There's no reason for police to get involved. She isn't breaking any laws. But people should probably encourage him to break up with her

Agreed. Well, technically she might be breaking the law in the UK, but it's a silly law. The police aren't there to punish people for being assholes.

[–]25russianbear25 8 points9 points10 points 9 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

Exactly. Some guys are volunterely into BDSM/humiliation etc which is considered abuse/battery without consent.

If he wants to be whipped, theres nothing anyone can do.

[–]Stripes1974 7 points8 points9 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

You mean-

...into BDSM/humiliation etc which is considered not to be abuse/battery, but similar to abuse, but with consent.

There. Fixed that for you.

[–][deleted] 44 points45 points46 points 9 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

She's obviously fucking mental.

[–]OldSchoolNewRules 21 points22 points23 points 9 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

No she has money so she's eccentric.

[–]bennejam000 5 points6 points7 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

If I supported reddit even a little, you'd have gold right now.

[–]stemgang 59 points60 points61 points 9 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

Yes of course if we are not being hypocritical, we must call this domestic abuse.

But really it's just her being an asshole.

If he's a prostitute, he should squeeze her for as much wealth as he can, as soon as he can.

If he has any self-respect, he should leave her immediately.

[–]LandMineHare 15 points16 points17 points 9 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

No no no, get married, then file for divorce and claim you have a right to a large annual stipend because of the lifestyle you've become accustomed too.

[–]Lord_ThunderCunt 1 point2 points3 points 9 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

If she has a list for a holiday, she'll want a prenup.

[–]el_doherz 0 points1 point2 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Exactly. Never met a woman who wasn't a filthy hypocrite about prenups, they'd all advice to get one to protect their own wealth but dear lord the outrage that ensues if a man wants one.

[–]Imnotmrabut 17 points18 points19 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

She's running out of money and having to find new ways to play the media whore and minor celebrity of zero notoriety!

[–]Geekmonster 7 points8 points9 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Because it's the Daily Mail. None of it will be true.

[–]Regnes 3 points4 points5 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

To be fair, while people should be viewing it as domestic abuse, nobody is supporting her. They're all portraying her as a psycho, even if in a comical light. Treating something as a joke isn't always the same thing as not taking it seriously. Humour in these situations makes people think. If a real life situation is a joke, ought it not be a reality?

[+][deleted] 9 years ago* (1 child) | Copy Link

[permanently deleted]

[–]outtsider 0 points1 point2 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Way too many assumptions with that statement - an equally plausible and potentially more likely is that he's a little bitch and would be that way regardless of her little bit of money

[–][deleted] 10 points11 points12 points 9 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

This isn't abuse. This is someone being a controlling douche. Not sure why he's staying, except that she has a shit ton of money. He's found himself a sugar mama. There's no law against that.

The police aren't involved because she hasn't broken any laws. The police don't get involved when a man tells his girlfriend or wife what to do, either, because that's not exactly illegal either. It's not a healthy relationship but the cops aren't there to deal with unhealthy relationships; they're there to protect people who are getting hurt. This guy isn't getting hurt. Odds are good that he's laughing at her behind her back and telling her buddies what a bitch she is.

[–]Mens-Advocate 13 points14 points15 points 9 years ago* (2 children) | Copy Link

Wrong. Under DV laws passed in France and Portugal among others, controlling behaviour is a criminal offence.

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/women/womens-life/11044069/Domestic-violence-Controlling-behavior-is-abuse-and-its-time-we-criminalised-it.html
http://www.halsburyslawexchange.co.uk/domestic-abuse-how-to-tackle-non-violent-control/
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/lisa-aronson-fontes-phd/it-felt-like-love-but-it-was-coercive-control_b_7512278.html

As a society, we should consider following the lead of several countries including France, Spain, Sweden, Portugal, Canada, and Tasmania that have legislation that makes coercive control or emotional abuse a crime. (Similar legislation is being considered in the United Kingdom).

[–]manelsen 1 point2 points3 points 9 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

Brazilian Law calls it "psychological violence".

[–]Mens-Advocate 0 points1 point2 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

And yet the mainstream media will still insist upon calling "macho" these same societies, such as France, Portugal, Brazil, and Israel.

The developed world seems to be heading inexorably towards a legal and social environment in which any male's life is to be destroyed should he ever dare to displease any female.

[–]Mens-Advocate 2 points3 points4 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

OP is correct. Coercive control is criminal DV according to feminist law:

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/women/womens-life/11044069/Domestic-violence-Controlling-behavior-is-abuse-and-its-time-we-criminalised-it.html
http://www.halsburyslawexchange.co.uk/domestic-abuse-how-to-tackle-non-violent-control/
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/lisa-aronson-fontes-phd/it-felt-like-love-but-it-was-coercive-control_b_7512278.html

As a society, we should consider following the lead of several countries including France, Spain, Sweden, Portugal, Canada, and Tasmania that have legislation that makes coercive control or emotional abuse a crime. (Similar legislation is being considered in the United Kingdom).

[–]Wauwosaurus 1 point2 points3 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

I'm just taking this out my arse, but I am of the belief that he might have interest in the money she possesses.

[–]chambertlo 1 point2 points3 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

He is an idiot for being with her, plain and simple. A man should never allow a woman to dictate what he does.

[–]HotDealsInTexas 3 points4 points5 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Yep. Abuse.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points4 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

He's a man. They don't care. They never will care.

There is nothing in life but suffering. That is the only truth.

[–]Hydris 1 point2 points3 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

He can tell her to fuck off if he doesn't want to follow them, and she can break up with him. Nothing is being forced here. Move along.

[–]Richard_the_Saltine 1 point2 points3 points 9 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

Are we stupid? This isn't domestic abuse. She's not forcing him to play along. The guy is a dumbass for acquiescing, and any suffering as a result of this situation is 100% his fault.

[–]Mens-Advocate 4 points5 points6 points 9 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link

Wrong. If genders reversed the rich guy would be in gaol and the mate would have all his money.

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/women/womens-life/11044069/Domestic-violence-Controlling-behavior-is-abuse-and-its-time-we-criminalised-it.html
http://www.halsburyslawexchange.co.uk/domestic-abuse-how-to-tackle-non-violent-control/
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/lisa-aronson-fontes-phd/it-felt-like-love-but-it-was-coercive-control_b_7512278.html

As a society, we should consider following the lead of several countries including France, Spain, Sweden, Portugal, Canada, and Tasmania that have legislation that makes coercive control or emotional abuse a crime. (Similar legislation is being considered in the United Kingdom).

[–]geniice 0 points1 point2 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

The police are not generaly foolish enough to belive the Daily Mail.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

I thought it was funny and I think her doing that and him posting about her being "psycho" shows that they can take the piss out of each other. What would have been nice would for this one to go under the radar, then for him to make a T-shirt and rules for her for next year and for the feminista to go bananas in the press over it.

[–]DarthOvious 0 points1 point2 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Posted this myself a couple of days ago. Completely fucking mental. He's not even allowed a tattoo. That's how controlling she is.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

I don't give a fuck how rich she is id rather be broke as fuck than with a girl who looks like that

[–]feedmecarrots 0 points1 point2 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Someone once told me if a man marries money, he will work hard for it for the rest of his life. That is one thing. This is another and they aren't married. He should take a hike.

[–]Regnes 0 points1 point2 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

I think it's important to note that that piece came from the Daily Mail. Checking sources, it does appear to be true, but the Daily Mail is the last place you want to go for credible information. A good rule of thumb, if it's on the Daily Mail, make sure it's on a reputable source as well.

Citing the daily mail is akin to using the National Enquirer as a news source.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5eBT6OSr1TI

[–]Disaster532385 0 points1 point2 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Why is this in a newspaper and can't he use some of her money to buy himself a spine?

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Look whos smiling in this picture. Poor slave

[–]Treeclimber3 0 points1 point2 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Dump her!

[–]BigJ76 -1 points0 points1 point 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Ashamed to say that money can make people do things they normally wouldn’t do. If your non-millionaire girlfriend did this you'd probably tell her to piss off without a lot of thought. If she were a millionaire you'd be saying "Yes, dear"

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