The top post of a women's only subreddit today is an appalling exercise in self absorption. I wanted to share my feelings where they're not dismissed because I'm a man.

So, I browse /r/all. I use RES on PC, but it doesn't have a block list that is saved to my reddit account, so it shows up on my phone.

http://ibelieveyouitsnotyourfault.tumblr.com/post/95389261470/it-was-easier-to-give-in-than-keep-running

This is the link that is the #1 post getting circlejerked on a women's subreddit. Literally a giant post about how it's hard to be a woman and men don't understand. The level of self-absorption is astounding. The author (in theory) has had a rough life. Some of her stories actually include why the bad thing happened: because she was a dumbass and put herself in a bad situation. Not her fault though, right? No blame to share, just fingers to point.

Suffice to say, I wanted to come to a place where reasonable discussion happens instead of misandry. :)

Men deal with their own issues. We all know what they are. I find the implication that men don't deal with problems so incredibly infuriating that I had to vent.

Men have no idea what it takes to be a woman. To grin and bear it and persevere. The constant state of war, navigating the relentless obstacle course of testosterone and misogyny, where they think we are property to be owned and plowed. But we’re not. We are people, just like them. Equals, in fact, or at least that’s the core of what feminism is still trying to achieve. The job is not over. We’ve made great progress. There are female CEOs, though not very many. There are females writing for the New York Times and winning Pulitzer prizes, though not very many. There are female politicians, though not very many. But these advances are only on paper. The job won’t be over until equality permeates the air we breathe, the streets we walk and the homes we live in.

Here's my version/response:

Men know what it's like to be men. To always have to stand strong and "Take it like a man." The constant state of war, navigating the relentless obstacle course of ignorance and misandry, where they assume we are guilty of being violent racists until proven innocent. But we're not. We are people, just like them. Equals, in fact, but that's what today's feminism is fighting against. Our fight is just beginning. We're just starting to make progress. There are companies that refuse to give hiring priority to either gender, but not many. There are men who go to work and don't worry about their achievements being minimized because they were born male, but not every man can say this. There are men who become stay at home dads that endure judgement and taunting, but have nobody fighting to promote the ignorance that they should be treated as if they never left. But our fight is just beginning, and we have much to accomplish. The job won't be over until feminists stop demanding special treatment, to be exceptions to rules, and winning more often than not.

Background on why I'm posting here instead of in the comments section there:

The last time I responded to a post in this particular subreddit that I stumbled across on /r/all, I was run out specifically because I was perceived to be a man (I am, but made no gender specific statements). The post was about positive body image. A guy posted that men don't need women to be barbie dolls, that it's okay to be unique. He was accused of being sexist, and non-productive. I offered my support saying that there's no reason that it's inappropriate for a guy to chime in and be supportive. They threatened to ban me for saying that. I told them that their behavior is a big example of why boys become misogynist men.