Losing the love of your life and your job at the same time is as bad as you think it is. I'm afraid I'm going to be one of those "It's been five years and I still miss her" guys. We've been separated for 6 months and the divorce is coming soon.

I think about suicide every single day but I don't have the balls. All specialists I talked to agree that I have to spend time in a mental health facility, but I don't want to.

I can't even begin to process my new reality. I'm absolutely depressed, sad, and in shock. I never in my life thought that I would experience this kind of suffering.

I'm going crazy because I just can't accept what happened and what's happening and depression is killing me. I just can't process it.

This is by far the worst thing that happened to me in my whole life, and I'm just too weak to deal with it.

Thank you, writing about it makes me feel a little bit better.