Settle now and contest later?

Puzzleheaded_Monk_39 · 2025-07-28T05:51:48+00:00

I messed up and now im fighting tooth and claw for 50/50 and she’s delaying everything. Start off with 50/50 and make it work

Vinyasa_Veritas · 2025-07-27T01:20:51+00:00

fight for 50/50 and drive the 20 m each way with the kids to school 2 or 3 days a week. that time will become precious, treasured memories. it's long enough that you'll get past the morning grumpies and into some real conversation and connection. in the darkest days of my separation/divorce my oldest kid was going to a high school 18 minutes away (i get that's a lot closer than 20 m) -- but i look back with gratitude for that time in the car alone with her.

No_Pace2396 · 2025-07-27T00:34:56+00:00

Custody is modifiable…just not usually in a favorable way to fathers. I’d put the odds on 66-33 becoming 70-30 before 50-50.

ageoffri · 2025-07-26T23:06:23+00:00

Courts love to keep status quo. If you go for 66/33 now, it gets very hard to go for 50/50 if it is contested.

You need to eat the cost in gas and time to drive the 20 miles. Move closer ASAP.

nerdzilla16 · 2025-07-26T22:33:52+00:00

I would recommend at least a consultation with an attorney before you do this. It does seem logical, but check for circumstances that may affect this. A consultation now may help save you a lot in the future.

Signal-Dot2326 · 2025-07-26T21:46:49+00:00

Don't be stupid, don't ever agree to anything less then 50/50, 20 miles isn't far, I think our agreement which was boiler plate type stuff says 25 miles and we have equal time

What you could do is make the agreement after x amount of years schedule exchanges to XYZ or IF you move back into said town you get more time, but just flat out settling because of high cost of living in that town is stupid. Especially if CS changes drastically due to time spent with children. You'll regret your decision if you do that guaranteed unless you're fine with being a once and awhile dad

No-Tomorrow8150 · 2025-07-26T20:14:56+00:00

Don’t know your details but it will be difficult to change later unless your ex is some kind of saint.

chinnick967 · 2025-07-26T20:07:25+00:00

You need a significant change in circumstance to change it later. Judges don't like to change things around and cause instability for kids.

If you agree to that now, you could very well be locked into it permanently

Title	Settle now and contest later?
Author	Careless-Beginning73
Upvotes	3
Comments	11
Date	July 26, 2025 7:57 PM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/1ma2q0s/settle_now_and_contest_later/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/settle-now-and-contest-later.1558173 https://theredarchive.com/post/1558173

Comments