Aging?

Academic_Type624 · 2022-12-05T15:32:07+00:00

The things that make a relationship last are rarely based on looks. Most people in general are looking for partners who have similar values, who are kind and caring and will go through the hard times together.

There is the stereotypes of men trading in for younger models, but the answer to that is know what you want. If you're happy to enjoy that lifestyle while it lasts, go for it, but it's unlikely you'll feel secure.

The thing is being attractive isn't solely about looks. Was last single in my mid 30s and got way more attention than I did in my 20s, became I was confident in myself despite being a larger size and objectively less attractive.

Available-Ad-9338 · 2022-12-05T16:20:21+00:00

I'm 29 and I get plenty of attention, from men I consider high quality. I am thin and childfree and I put a lot of effort into my appearance. Stay fit, be pleasant and likeable, and you will not struggle to attract dates.

"All the women who rejected me in my 20s will come crawling back in their 30s and I'll laugh in their faces" is a revenge fantasy.

When I was 18-20, the older men who hit on me were married creeps looking for a sidechick. I'm glad that I've become too old for them. Nothing of value was lost. You don't want to date men who will dump you the moment you age out of their preferred age preference, or only value naivete.

xvszero · 2022-12-05T16:27:53+00:00

This age nonsense was just invented by men who want to control women. Sure some men will prefer younger women... you don't want those men anyway... but a lot of people are fine with aging.

My wife is 40 and she rules.

PutsWomenOnPedestal · 2022-12-05T14:26:20+00:00

started to perceive signs of aging as worse looking on women than I did before

If you Google “older women” or something along those lines , you’ll see a bunch of images of different older women, some of them smoking hot and some of them not so much. So how a woman (or a man) ages is very much a case by case basis. General statements like “all women age this way” are very obviously false. Personally I find some older actresses who stay fit hotter than their younger selves.

I’ve started to be terrified of aging

As a 50+ man, I’m terrified of aging too. I do what I can to increase my fitness, lose excess weight, etc. What else can we do?

Melificarum · 2022-12-05T18:59:02+00:00

I have been seeing younger women post about this a lot more lately and it makes me pretty sad. It's completely unfounded. I never see or hear women in their 30's or 40's complain about their age or how they are having trouble getting dates. In fact, if you ask most older women what their favorite age was, it's usually their 30's.

In my own friend group, all my friends who are approaching their 40's and are single are men. They complain about how there aren't any good women their own age, but this is mostly because there are limited options. If there was a late 30's woman without kids and in good shape, she would find someone almost instantly, so, they aren't on Tinder and they aren't at the bar. They can't find women younger than them either because in reality, not many younger women want to date older men.

Don't get it into your head that being 30 is going to make you an old crone that no one wants. It's propaganda the redpill is putting out to make their consumers feel better about themselves and to make young women feel more insecure and become easier targets.

Big-Bonkin-Head · 2022-12-05T15:53:52+00:00

The mindset that 18-22 years are the most attractive is borderline predatory. Of course it’s legal in most to all countries but I’m referring to the maturity gap. Even an 18 and 22 year old are in nearly completely different stages of life. 30 year olds going for college aged women have always baffled me. I’m 22 and when I was single, I had a hard time talking to someone even 20. Maybe it was maturity or my preference for older women. Who knows. But men definitely age if they do not take care of themselves. Now it is true that a lot of men see their dating life pick up in their Mid 20s to Early 30s as men tend to mature in their looks later or find more social confidence, but women also can have this glow up later. A lot of what Red Pill teaches can really be applied to both genders in my experience

Willing_Coconut809 · 2022-12-05T21:20:13+00:00

It’s a revenge fantasy. I get more attention and better quality men in my 30’s than I did in my 20s. I eat healthy, workout and take care of myself.

unkownz72020 · 2022-12-05T14:36:40+00:00

Why should be terrified of something that is natural and there's no escape from, just don't overthink it and enjoy your current age (I mean enjoy yourself at any age). We should appreciate aging too to get rid of this toxic mindset that most women do have.

I'm actually in my early 20s, being the eldest girl in my family came with the mindset of fearing getting old and always feeling I'm not young (I felt old at 19 and whenever I remember that, I feel sad for my old self, I was literally so young but I didn't realize that) that reflected also on the way I act, I used to wear clothes that weren't for my age, I didn't enjoy my life, I was trapped in a very toxic mindset but fortunately I grew out of that.

AssistTemporary8422 · 2022-12-06T03:55:28+00:00

There is some truth to the red pill narratives. It is true that women in their 20s are more attractive than in their 30s and looks matters more for women than men, and career matters more for men than women. It is also true that the age gap is larger the older the guy is.

But the red pill exaggerates and generalizes these trends. Most older guys are still dating women within 10 years of their age. Looks matters a lot for both genders and even though we aren't as hot as we were in our 20s, we can always date people close to age who are about as attractive as we are.

Many women are very attractive in their 30s if they take care of themselves. If they don't, they can find men with the same lifestyle. Looks is important to men but we also care about personality too and our dating option are limited by what women want. As time goes on hypergamy is decreasing and women are preferring men with careers less and less, but online dating has made men's looks more important.

domitori3 · 2022-12-05T16:07:09+00:00

There is no absolute "value". It's always relative and subjective.
Thirties is the time when everybody think they are becoming fossils. Don't worry, you would become young again, with time.
Red pillers have hit the wall of mental development at 15

EmbarrassedEmu27 · 2022-12-06T06:13:48+00:00

Red pill is all about sex and short term relationship and people who want long monogamous relationship have no take away from it. They exaggerate outliers as norm which is not reality of the world.

Firstly where will 50year old men meet all the young girls they are claiming to be queuing for them? . Young girls are in college dating their peer or living in with their BFs . How many parents of young girls will be okay with these kind of relationships? . Imagine being 50 and still swiping at girls on tinder hoping to get match and sex that would actually be a sad life. If they had divorced their wife because she aged imagine the alimony + child support payment they have to pay and the loss of respect in the eyes of children. They will also not get respect from friends and family members for breaking by a family for younger women. Think realistically if a uncle in your family did it how will he get treated? .

Only very few filthy rich men can afford to change their wives likes that without any consequences. On the flip side how can a older dude be sure the young girl is not in it for the money and dump him in few years? .

In real world people fall in love with people close to their age meeting via peer group and built a family with them. It is becoming common for women in 30s to get married and have their first child after 30 so it’s okay. Millions of men want stable family with kids living being with in love with their wives and growing old with them . Choose those men and ignore these outliers.

Legitimate_Plate_802 · 2022-12-07T23:07:22+00:00

Those things you have read and heard come from the conspiracy to control women and control how we perceive our worth in this world. It comes from misogyny that has been deep rooted in most human cultures where men have had more status in society. There are so many good men out there who do not view us as aging fruits and who actually see the value in us as human beings. There are many women who give themselves away to old men with money just for material things and they devalue what it means to be a woman. To fight misogyny we have to start with pure and stop buying into the brainwashing that is being taught. A woman has no less value on Earth than a man and we are both worthy and deserving of life and happiness. Find a good man who loves women for who we are and doesn’t feel the need to compete or put us down to build himself up, I promise you there are so many men who are good. Also focus on intelligence and creativity…we have more to offer the world than just physical beauty. I started hearing about aging when I turned 25 and saw how toxic people’s outlooks on aging are. We have to be rebels and not follow these people and their narratives.

drunk_blueberry · 2022-12-05T21:04:00+00:00

I'm 34 and my husband is 27. People assume that I'm younger than him.

We went to a dinner party with his Co workers. There was booze and I requested some wine. The 21 year old that was passing the booze around asked me if I was of legal drinking age.

I told them that I am 34. They were in shock and asked to see my ID because they couldnt believe it due to how I looked.

Next, I was bombarded with my skin care secrets for the next half hour ( my secret is plenty of sleep, drink water and wear sunscreen. Also, remember to take your daily supplements/vitamins! This advice isnt just for women. Everyone should be wearing sunscreen!!!)

I'm also very slim and fit. A lot of it depends on a mix of genetics and taking care of your health. I have health issues only because of a spinal injury. I stay fit with low impact exercise and physical therapy.

Misogynistic men are very insecure people and often use the " wall" as a way to knock women down a peg. They do it to soothe their wounded ego and to establish dominance.

People will argue that we hit the wall at 30 due to the small window of time where we are fertile.

Yes, it's safer to have children in your twenties but pregnancy/child birth is still dangerous regardless of your age.

And for you men out there. Just because you can knock women up at age 50, like a woman's eggs, your sperm quality won't be the greatest.

Interneth0e · 2022-12-05T16:13:00+00:00

All that Red pill shit I saw traumatised me almost to the point of no return

Interneth0e · 2022-12-05T16:12:19+00:00

Stuff like this made me have suicidal thoughts even more and think that after 30 I’m better off committing suicide bc no one will care about me even after death bc I wasn’t ‘valuable enough’ to them.

jrr6415sun · 2022-12-05T15:15:13+00:00

Men care about a womans look a lot more than a woman cares about a man’s look. Its mostly about personality for a man. Yes not all women and men are like this but a majority do.

dissonantclear · 2022-12-08T04:56:29+00:00

I will be 42 next week. My husband is seven months younger than me, which he sometimes teases me about in a nice way.

I don’t think anything short of me going back in time being key to a plot to nationalize the American health care system would be worth being in my early 20s again. I love who and where I am now. I am grateful to 20s me for doing what she did to get me here, but I do not want to be young with fresh unhealed trauma again.

No person worth building a life with is going to be so weird and judgy about age. Most people are aware that living beings age, that it’s normal, and that the only alternative is dying young.

Sounds like these men are stuck mentally and emotionally at 12 years old. I pity them because it must be terrible to be a 12 year old in an adult body and they probably had no proper parenting or models to help them grow past early adolescence, but really you should not let their opinions affect you at all.

It’s just…I can’t imagine someone so focused on looks and age being a good partner. What are they going to do when you get sick or…well, when anything that indicates you are a living human and not an unchanging doll happens? They won’t be there for you. They’ll drop you and run to the next doll until it begins to show signs of wear.

That’s not the behavior of a mentally well adult. It’s the behavior of a damaged child who needs far more help than you can give him. It’s okay to put up boundaries and to walk away and find a mature adult man.

willstdumichstressen · 2022-12-12T19:25:10+00:00

How old are you, OP?

I turned 38 this year, and this has been the best year of my life. A lot of things happen to you once you turn 30. You stop caring about a lot of this trivial nonsense.

It may sound like a cope, but I don't feel like I'm anywhere close to my peak. I'm in the best shape of my life; my writing has come a long way; I feel I'm on my purpose, and I know exactly what I want in my romantic relationships.

If you're in your 20s, I promise you--it gets better. But do the hard work now. Stop believing a book written over ten years ago by a basement-dwelling nerd who hasn't dated a new woman in almost three decades. He's not a man you should be emulating in any aspect.

Especially with women. I've said this before, but I was in college as a student and worked in education for 5.5 years as a TA who ran his own classes. I've gotten laid by more college girls in my 30s than I ever did when I was a student or TA

willstdumichstressen · 2022-12-28T01:19:10+00:00

I’m 23 and I’ve felt the same as you ever since I discovered TRP at 22 :( I can’t get it out of my head

Title	Aging?
Author	Sad_Apple_1911
Upvotes	33
Comments	66
Date	December 5, 2022 2:06 PM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/ExRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/exredpill/comments/zd7nlk/aging/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/ExRedPill/aging.1142836 https://theredarchive.com/post/1142836

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