Virginity

MechanicHopeful4096 · 2024-01-18T05:28:49+00:00

In my experience with dating, not at all. Didn’t affect me one bit. I’ve known many men who wanted to date somebody who knew what they were doing.

The only grown men obsessed with a woman’s virginity are creeps and tbh you’re better off not interacting with them.

Also I’d never try to live to the standards of random men. Bothered about my past? Don’t talk to me then. I’m not living according to anybody else’s opinion🤷‍♀️

xvszero · 2024-01-18T02:08:11+00:00

Depends what culture you are talking about. The hardcore Christians I knew were all obsessed with virginity. No one else gave a shit.

Also age. Once people hit a certain age they care less and less about virginity.

Ok-Replacement3067 · 2024-01-18T04:39:44+00:00

When I was a virgin guys treated me very poorly because of it.. idk

Glad-Communication60 · 2024-01-18T01:53:51+00:00

Nah. As long as you don't have STDs, all good.

spiraldinosaur · 2024-01-18T09:32:35+00:00

Men who specifically want virgins are either some kind of religious fundamentalist, some pseudo-pedophile creep, or both. Any man who thinks that a woman having a tiny bit of sexual history makes her somewhat less appealing than if she was "pure" has an extremely warped idea of how sex alters the value of a woman, and thus generally has a warped idea of the value of women and probably doesn't see them as autonomous people, but sees them as some kind of commodity which can be spoiled or damaged by sex.

eatfleshdrinkblood · 2024-01-18T01:03:52+00:00

I don’t care, but I’m a virgin male so I’m not sure my opinion counts in this.

AssistTemporary8422 · 2024-01-18T01:28:37+00:00

Surveys show that both men and women prefer (but not require) someone who had a lower number of sexual partners in their past but not zero. People with zero partners are more likely to have fundamentalist religious beliefs, low sex drive, have mental health issues, social issues, and not be very good at sex. The exceptions to this are teenagers because so many are virgins at this age and fundamentalist communities.

Astronomer-Salty · 2024-01-18T01:10:26+00:00

That never really mattered to me.

an_altar_of_plagues · 2024-01-18T01:55:06+00:00

No, I do not want to date someone with no sexual experience. Mind you, it's mostly a moot point at this point in my life (31, engaged to a woman I've been with for five years) - but even if I were single, I would not prefer someone who has not had sex.

There's a few reasons why, but it mostly comes down to sexual compatibility being an important part of relationships for me. Not that I need to have a lot of sex, but aligning on sexual interests, libidos, etc. is healthy - and I can't really know that if we waited until marriage, which someone at my age is much more likely to prioritize (if they had not yet had sex). The other reason is I generally feel like if they're choosing to stay with me and enjoy sex with me, then it's because I'm doing something right rather than me just being their only experience.

Even before I started dating my fiancee, previous sexual experience was better because the woman and I are more likely to know what we want. I didn't (and don't) want someone who engaged in a lot of casual sex, but that's kind of a different thing.

ooa3603 · 2024-01-18T02:59:44+00:00

Sexually insecure men like the idea of virginity. It sooths their fears that the woman may have more sexual experience and could be comparing them to their other partners.

Sexually secure men who aren't afraid of their women being more experienced do not care about virginity.

Take that as you will

Cefalu87 · 2024-01-18T10:33:56+00:00

I would actively avoid dating a man who wanted a virgin woman. It suggests that either we wouldn’t have compatible religious/ total views, or that he had some ideas about ‘purity’ that are a complete no for me.

emta_official · 2024-01-18T12:41:48+00:00

O don't really care whether my partner is a virgin or not. I would mind when they treat having a sex is like a "reward" or something.

featherblackjack · 2024-01-18T04:40:01+00:00

Nooooo absolutely not. Most men are sensible enough to realize that deflowering someone is a weight they don't want to carry. Frankly, virgins aren't great in bed, either. Especially if they've been in any form of purity culture. That shit messes people up.

thrownawaytodaysr · 2024-01-18T15:53:16+00:00

I never cared. I care more about personality traits. I technically wouldn't care about someone having even 100 partners, but most people who might have that many likely have dispositional incompatibilities with me.

I had one partner who was a virgin of the however many partners I had. The rest were probably around 2 or 3 other than me. One was at around 40. None of that matters.

r2401 · 2024-01-19T22:29:53+00:00

Yes it's true most want it but in the same way most want to win the lottery. It would be nice to have but you don't give much serious thought to it.

undercovertrad · 2024-01-19T23:54:08+00:00

In my experience, most men obsessed with virginity are virgins themselves and extremely religious. I never met a man on the dating scene that cared about whether or not I was a virgin. There was concern about whether or not I was excessively promiscuous, but that’s not the same thing.

Top_Radio_9436 · 2024-01-20T04:01:44+00:00

An obsession with virginity can be a symptom of an insecure dude who compares himself with other guys to an unhealthy degree and you shouldn't date these guys generally. They are afraid of girls comparing them to other guys in the sexual arena and not being the "best" or whatever. They don't have to worry about those comparisons with a virgin.

DecisionPlastic9740 · 2024-01-18T04:54:42+00:00

That's probably the ideal.

shawninpa · 2024-01-18T11:57:27+00:00

Yes I always did, but it's from personal views and being a Christian..I can't imagine anyone wanting to be with someone that just sleeps with whoever when ever

2024-01-18T05:47:48+00:00

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Kreadon · 2024-01-18T13:36:21+00:00

It's not a good place to ask this. But truth be told, when it comes to just having sex, virginity can be a slight bonus, or it can be a negative. A lot of men will find the idea of being the first partner appealing, but there are a certain percentage of guys who definitely dislike virgins, girls included. These types want to have good sex, and that requires experience.

When it comes to starting a long-term relationship - yes, absolutely. There is a good reason most replies here reflect their own subjective view, instead of trying to answer your question "do most MEN like it". Most men I know would say yes. They would prefer it. That being said, it wears off significantly with age. If you say you're older than 23, it's probably not an important factor anymore, unless person is religious.

ashaw7 · 2024-01-18T23:47:09+00:00

Just wondering, bow os it that these men you date kr potentially date knew this status? Maybe guys like you more because announcing unsolicited that you are a virgin is a red flag.

Kurved420 · 2024-01-19T01:30:51+00:00

ashaw7 · 2024-01-19T03:32:28+00:00

I never attracted women who were promiscuous. There was one case of a girl when I was in grade 6 who had said that she got black out drunk and was assaulted by a group, like a sports team or something, and I wasn't less attracted to her for that, but in general I have always been more attractive to women who were quiet and mousy, or a bookworm type personality. I can't say it mattered to me much, but I did like the idea of finding someone and both of us being only true to each other. I think this feeling is amplified knowing that both of you had not given ourselves away completely to anyone else and make the decision when we are certain that we have found our life partner. But that's not how life turned out. I think it's great for anyone who does follow that path though. I think that a stigma on virginity on young people is really terrible. You could be discounting a great persin for a quality which really is just abstract.

Witness_Klutzy · 2024-01-20T19:32:34+00:00

I don't think dating a virgin woman long-term in a western country is realistic. Because at some point that woman who has only been with 1 guy is going to end up curious about what it's like with other men.

No criticism of that as it is normal. I don't need a virgin, but I prefer women who don't sleep around for long term relationships. I think both men and women who regularly sleep around can't maintain long-term relationships.

Because when you are constantly in short term situations with the opposite sex, you're unconsciously training your mind for non-monogamy.

Every person I know man or woman that were hooking up with different people while single, ended up either cheating or leaving their partners once in a relationship.

I think it is OK to vet someone (again both men and women) for body counts if that person is asking for a commitment. Someone with a high body count is a huge indicator they will cheat in a future relationship.

Only way that can work is if that person be it man or woman, let's you set boundaries. If they don't and then try to blameshift or gaslight you, break it off immediately.

Only way I could date a woman long-term with a promiscuous past is if she let's me set boundaries and has a mature attitude towards sex.

Meaning if a man is putting in the effort to please her sexually but isn't on a ps*r level the first time, they work with him and don't ghost. Problem is, most women expect you to be a maestro in the bedroom the 1st time out.

When realistically speaking,that takes time to develop. Provided the man is putting in the effort in the first place. But most women just ghost after the 1st time even if the guy was making their pleasure a priority.

This is why I support the Passport movement. Because men who have low body counts or are inexperienced, can meet non-western women who don't judge them for it. I think a lot of RP is garbage, but 50% of it is valid. There are toxic women overseas, but your odds of meeting a good woman go way up compared to here.

DaneCountyAlmanac · 2024-01-29T19:46:57+00:00

If you're a virgin at my age, you're asexual or you're a pathological liar.

Title	Virginity
Author	Admirable_Bid_9193
Upvotes	17
Comments	63
Date	January 18, 2024 12:57 AM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/ExRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/exredpill/comments/199d79s/virginity/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/ExRedPill/virginity.1243268 https://theredarchive.com/post/1243268

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