FDS Fashion Advice

pickadaisy · 2021-02-06T01:21:48+00:00

I can’t answer this for you because you need to decide for yourself. But let’s start with some thought exercises, okay?

Have you unpacked why you think wearing kitten heels and plaid skirts makes you sexy?

What about why you want to “be sexy”?

Do you also find yourself sexy when you’re not “looking” your best?

If not, are you okay with needing to seek from others validation that you’re sexy?

Do you know how to give yourself that validation?

Have you been honest with yourself about the comfort and mobility you feel in those items?

How quickly would you remove these items upon coming home from wearing them out and about?

Do you like to dress this way alone, hanging around a house by yourself for the same number of hours you’d wear it publicly?

Or, is there an entanglement between “what you like” and “what gets you feedback from others”?

If so, are you conscious of this and intentionally choosing that rather than claiming it’s your “style”?

When you notice other women and like something about them related to style, what are those things?

What are your influences when it comes to style?

Do your values still align with those influences?

What feels like you and what feels like dress up?

Are you dressing up to play a role and person you don’t truly believe you are?

——

I love dressing up to play characters, sometimes a badass, cold-hearted bitch who doesn’t need a man to accompany her out. I love her.

She’s the same character I played 10-15 years ago except that at that age, I somehow believed that tiny, tight, revealing clothes, uncomfortable heels, lack of warmth (how did I wait in line at clubs in 40 degree weather in only a short dress?) was sexy and powerful. I was always pulling on my clothing to fix them. My feet hurt. Hunger gnawed at me because I was too busy being sexy to plan enough food for myself or have a way to carry it.

I now dress comfortable everywhere I go. I still wear tiny skirts (over fleece leggings) and crop tops. My boobs are undeniable and I let them be who they are. I wear super soft fishnets but I rip out the crotchets and toes so they’re comfy. I don’t even bother with thongs. I wear cozy shoes and carry a small backpack. I’m still quite sexy (and being sexy is a burden, as you know), without performing sexy in a way that punishes me.

Whatever that is for you, I hope you find it and you share your story.

52490 · 2021-02-06T01:21:58+00:00

Honestly you can’t escape it. I can’t count how many times I was looking busted and still got creeped on.

Karthasis11 · 2021-02-06T01:07:11+00:00

Mean will always enjoy what they see. I was harassed after I learned 1 week straight for a final exam, didn't wash my hair, didn't changed my clothes, had messy hair Iwas very tiered on the way the location of the exam and even then a score manage to throw "nice tits" at my head. And I had very wide and sorry cloths on....

Normally I dress a sexy goth and yes guys are oggling, but they will never have me.

Vmwvi · 2021-02-06T01:32:20+00:00

Technically this post should go under Ask FDS. Post it there if you haven't already.

That aside, dress how you want to. It's not worth "being pretty" if you don't feel pretty. You don't have to dress in one particular way to be FDS. I'd advise against anything that you feel like you're wearing for the sakes of others e.g. big fancy dress that people say looks good you hate wearing because it's uncomfortable, painful high heels etc. Dress how you like. Don't let the threat of random men stop you from wearing what you want.

sassyheather · 2021-02-06T02:47:21+00:00

I really don’t care what and if men enjoy what they see. Hell, I don’t even think to myself “I wonder if my boyfriend will like this outfit”, my first thought is always “Do I like this outfit? Yeah so Imma wear it and he thinks I look great in anything so it doesn’t really matter”

fancypantsdance92 · 2021-02-06T01:31:26+00:00

I dress in a way that flatters me and in prints I like. I dress for me. I don't follow fashion trends and never have - if I feel like wearing a little white mini dress I will. If I want to wear jeans and a bright shirt, I will. But my usual go to is floral dresses which cinch at the waist and show off my legs. It's what I like 😊

SaturnGirl1989 · 2021-02-06T01:48:12+00:00

I personally enjoy the feel of a clean shaven leg, I take very good care of my hair, work out regularly, wax the brows, get my nails done, wear sexy clothes, high heels, makeup.. you name it, I love it haha.. but the thing is, I only do it when I'm in the mood.. I go shopping in shorts with unshaven legs, I let my eyebrows turn into a uni, my nails currently looks like garbage, and I've been wearing sweatpants for a week straight.. why?? BECAUSE I DONT CARE WHAT OTHER PEOPLE ENJOY ABOUT MY BODY... you like how I like? Cool.. you think I look like a troll? Good for you.. but we both know you don't, and you would fuck me either way lmao

Dress how you want, you'd be surprised by how little anybody actually cares enough to say something

wavesandtea · 2021-02-06T12:30:16+00:00

I used to be so conflicted about this. What is my pure sense of style when I eliminate male influence in the fashion world. Men's clothes are getting more comfortable while our clothes on the runway get skimpier and more uncomfortable each year... Last fashion week they had women dressed in see-through thick PLASTIC. It looked so uncomfortable.

I recently read the book "I don't owe you pretty". I'd highly recommend it!

ReignOnYou95 · 2021-02-06T05:02:30+00:00

Well Ive always been to stubborn so Ive always dressed for comfort.

Astral_weaver · 2021-02-06T14:27:19+00:00

Even pre-FDS days, I always preferred comfy over sexy.

I dress in ways that make me feel comfortable and cute: A clean pair of comfy shoes, mid-to-long skirts, cute dresses, nice trousers or even good quality yoga pants. And I always get compliments about my outfits, especially from my girl students.

So focus on these things:

Wear clothes that are comfortable and of good quality.

You don't need to show skin in order to feel and be attractive.

Take care of your garments and shoes.

If not sure about your style, try some basic pieces (a good pair of trousers and a white shirt for example)

Focusing on being comfortable doesn't mean that you can't experiment with your appearance, or that you can't pull some dramatic outfits.

Just dress in order to feel nice, aesthetically and physically. Anything that causes you discomfort in anyway is not something that you need to wear.

Hope I helped. Take care ✨

Title	FDS Fashion Advice
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	57
Comments	13
Date	February 5, 2021 7:20 AM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/ld1yx1/fds_fashion_advice/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/fds-fashion-advice.1193091 https://theredarchive.com/post/1193091

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