Hit it off with a man I thought had excellent potential. Messaged him a few days later and told me he was not interested in seeing me because he was looking for someone with more balance. Does anyone know what it is to be “balanced?”

Hhjjuuy · 2020-06-09T08:35:08+00:00

It doesn't mean anything. Please block and delete this predator. A 32 year old man who is worth your time would never have persued you at 22 years old.

It doesn't mean anything. He was trying to make you feel shitty and question yourself and well... here we are.

woldielocks · 2020-06-09T08:53:00+00:00

You consider a 32 y/o man with 2 kids who didn't message you first after a date and who turned into a negging passive aggressive little bitch a catch?

I see a lot of heartbreak and wasted years in your future if you don't smarten up.

divdec · 2020-06-09T11:13:07+00:00

Age gap? Red flag.

“Wrong guy” passive aggressive message after only 30 mins?!!!

Sounds like by “balanced” he meant someone who will give him nonstop attention.

The “wrong guy” comment made me cringe so hard, he’s obviously already insecure about you talking to other people so just please dump this loser and move on with your life. He is an imbecile and there is no reason why a woman who’s working hard for a future and has her whole life ahead of her should settle for an already divorced with kids controlling, passive aggressive dumbass like that.

You’re not missing out on anything. He’s not a catch. He’s a predator and a dumb one at that. Date men closer to your age please. Leave the old scrotes alone. Any man who wants to date a woman 10+ younger is predatory and manipulative. Please don’t feel bad that this man “rejected” you he sounds like a complete loser.

ChocoBananza · 2020-06-09T09:33:21+00:00

Blessing in disguise.

Block and delete.

Milobear27 · 2020-06-09T11:05:41+00:00

Why did you message him first? And when you didn’t have the time to text? Control yourself. Improve your dating game by only being attracted to men who are very into you.

2020-06-09T11:34:49+00:00

Age gap and the fact he's divorced with two kids = red flags. It's better that you don't date someone like that. What a big baby that he got all upset over waiting 30 minutes for a reply! Trash took itself out!

RadarFemef · 2020-06-09T12:40:34+00:00

He’s not a catch at all

Block and move on, forget everything he ever said to you

devoushka · 2020-06-09T18:11:22+00:00

Girl. You seem motivated and ambitious, do you really need an older man, with two whole ass kids and a baby mama, holding you back? Even if he was respectful and liked you, it's still a huge red flag. You dodged a bullet. Don't give much older men with kids a chance anymore.

Edit to add: having an education and not being a fat slob doesnt make him a catch. Raise your standards

bey124 · 2020-06-09T20:35:26+00:00

Want to be more balanced? Balanced in his book appearantly is dropping everything you’re doing when he pays attention to you and wants you to pay attention to him. You should also consider not doing menial activities such as focussing on your future by educating yourself, because this man deemed you worthy of his attention. /s, obviously.

Sis, this guy was horrible to you. Don’t listen to him. You are doing great. Focus on you.

Edit: forgot to add: What you were doing was actually showing balance: prioritizing different aspects of your life and combining them in a healthy manner. The fact that he threw a tantrum for not getting what he wanted, shows that despite him being much older, you behave in a more mature manner.

goatismycopilot · 2020-06-09T11:24:28+00:00

Nothing is wrong with you and this guy did you a favour.

ShieldMaidenLagertha · 2020-06-09T19:45:37+00:00

So, this is a textbook controlling dude. Run. And block him because I guarantee he will try to reel you back in.

ErikaNaumann · 2020-06-09T23:27:21+00:00

He is not a great catch. Even if we ignore the age difference, do you really wanna deal with a divorcee and 2 kids at age 22? Being at stepmother at age 22 is not goals at all.

You need to read the FDS handbook. Read it carefully, take notes if needed. You never text first. You block immediately when they neg. You set clear boundaries and you respect them.

cirrus_cloud · 2020-06-10T19:02:49+00:00

The fact that you’re concerned about a neg he threw at you is the real concern here. Why do you care so much what some scrote from Tinder thinks about you?

Hanna-love · 2020-06-11T00:51:37+00:00

LOOOLLL he meant that he wants someone to be at his beck and call, and uses "balance" to describe that. He means he wants the scales of "BaLaNcE" tipped in his direction. Take a martial arts class, or go on a backpacking group. Men I've met in those two arenas usually have a degree of consideration and discipline. I've met plenty of old farts trolling college campuses to find a young girl. They AIN'T SHIT.

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