I have the BIGGEST Pick Me, Insecure Roommate.. What to do?

I go to University and one of my roommates is an extremely toxic pick me. I don’t think anyone would even think this is real because the shenanigans that she is in involved in are incredible. Let’s call her Cassie. At first, I pitied her because she has her own demons and I know she is just projecting her insecurities, but now it is starting to affect me in my home space.

This girl is obviously delusional and un-hinged. All that she talks about is boys and I can even hear her from my room as she shares her boy drama she is always involved in. These types of girls only seek male validation and their self-esteem is in the trenches to the point where they would throw their “friends” under the bus just for male acceptance. I try to remain stoic and not react to her backhanded passive comments but it is starting to take a toll on my mental health the more I am home. She has jokingly admitted to us roommates that she loves to manipulate, is non-confrontational, and that she’s glad that her life entertains everyone. At first, it was entertaining and funny, but now my roommate and I agree that now we feel like we’re living vicariously through her boy drama. It is draining & toxic. How do I manage this? Buckle in ladies… because you’re in for a long but mind-boggling story.

Her involvement with men:

When we met a few months ago, Cassie would not stop talking about her ex she was with for 4 months. She basically transferred here for him after he cheated on her multiple times (she didn’t admit this until down the line). She would constantly vent to me and our 3 other roommates about how she needs to find him and get her one shirt back and that she knows the man who loved her is deep in there. She claims he’s so different now since he joined a fraternity and that he promised to love her forever (she said this verbatim.) He works at one of the college bars and she would constantly go there to try to find him. She sent him a voice memo on her birthday saying he owes her a response/closure.. he saved the voice memo and never answered 😬. She also slept with one of one his frat brothers the first week of the semester. She was so determined get close with his brothers and wanted to sleep with his pledge master to get at him. The morning after she slept with his frat brother, she told us the story as if this boy was obsessed with her. She claims it was “fan behavior” and that he said, “I can’t believe this is happening.” She says many of his frat brothers have told her that her ex is not in a good place and not the same since they broke up. (When we all know these boys are laughing together 🙄). One of his frat brothers told her there wouldn’t be a problem with her to go to the house to pick up her stuff from her ex. Finally, she decided to drive ALONE to his frat house and WAIT IN HIS BEDROOM for him to come home 🤡🤡. He called her and told her to get out of the house and he did not have her stuff. She blocked his number after but still talks about him occasionally. The boy that encouraged her to go to the frat house claimed he “didn’t remember” giving he permission the night before. 2 months later she finds her ex at the bar he works at and slaps him in the face.

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• Side note: this girl loves BDSM and has a blood/knife kink. She has shown us scars and a video of her ex choking her until she passes out as they are laughing.
• When we came back from spring break, Cassie shared that she slept with a boy who has a girlfriend that goes to our university but that it was justifiable because the girlfriend is crazy & blackmailing him and that their relationship is toxic. Cassie claims she would never date him because he would do the same to her. (keep this in mind) She also admitted she was on the fence about telling me because "I judge." (Um YES I will judge you if you're a HOMEWRECKER? 😂)

Our other roommate’s boyfriend is in a different fraternity, so we go to their parties & go out with them. Cassie’s “close friend” from her hometown was friends with benefits with one of the boys in this frat months ago (let’s call him Frank) and it turned into a sticky situation. After Frank wanted nothing to do with her friend, he moved onto Cassie. Except Cassie never told her “friend” that he was reaching out to her or that he wanted to sleep with her. Instead, she entertained him when he would reach out. Frank does not respect Cassie at all and always told everyone out loud that Cassie was “ferda,” meaning “for da boys and for the fraternity he is in.” This is after the fact that she has shown interest in many of his other frat brothers and slept with one of them. She would laugh and then call HERSELF “ferda.”🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️ She had a goal to letter this fraternity (sleep with 3 boys from the same frat). One night she comes home with another one of Frank’s brothers and sleeps with him. She sent Frank a photo of them two and the next morning the boy texts Frank that he had sex the night before. Frank was pissed and was extremely disrespectful and demeaning toward Cassie the next night when we all went out. Cassie told me at the end of the night she wanted to sleep with Frank and that she was going to turn off her location and I couldn’t tell a soul so it doesn’t get back to her “friend.” I asked her how she could sleep or associate with someone who talked to her like that and she admitted that she liked it. The next morning, she lied to me and said nothing sexual happened and she ended up crying to Frank.

Cassie mentioned a while ago to our roommates that she realizes she's filling the hole from her ex with all of these boys. I was a bit crass and said “you’re just figuring that out now?” and she got extremely offended.

The same weekend when we are all out, she is all over Frank and he wants nothing to do with her and being extremely aloof. Our other roommate drunkingly told me that she and Frank did in fact sleep together and that Cassie did not want me to know specifically because I would judge her. The same night she sees that the couple that she home wrecked is there and she is brushing hands with the boyfriend while his girlfriend is right there and does not notice.  We go back to the fraternity house and she is embarrassing herself to the max by being all over Frank on the couch when he is showing no interest and spewing nonsense out of her mouth from being too drunk and coked out. The next morning, she brings the boyfriend to our apartment because he had to go to a hotel after a fight with his girlfriend. They have sex and she DRIVES HIM TO THE AIRPORT. 😬🤡🤡🤡🤡

I did ask Cassie why she sleeps with these boys if she does not get any benefit nor enjoy it. She said she didn’t know and she probably needs help.

Examples of when she puts me down and sees me as competition:

• One day when I was cleaning the kitchen, I threw out a note on the door that I didn’t bother to read. I thought it was an old note/reminder for the dog we used to foster. I didn’t know it was an inside joke regarding one of the boys she brought home one night who slept on our couch. When all the roommates were drinking before going out, I come out and she goes off on me with everyone silent. She goes “bitch you threw out my note? You’re a bitch for that, bitch.” And I looked at her in silence and responded “If you care that much about a piece of paper, go get it out of the trash.” – I confronted her a week later saying I didn’t know what the note was and didn’t know she’d be so upset over it. She responded, “ok good I  thought it was ill intent. That would’ve been a sign of war.” (LOL OK GIRL what are you going to do?” 😂🙂) I said that I do not have time or energy for “war.”
• She also knows one thing I am conscious about is being too muscular or looking manly from weightlifting. I have been sticking to cardio and yoga and even everyone from home told me my legs look skinnier/less muscular. When we came back from break, I come home from class and was making breakfast. She goes “Damn girl your legs are looking HUGE.” And then after she says, “I didn’t mean it in a bad way they look good!"
• When we came back from break, I also asked if I looked like I lost any weight to a different roommate because I have been trying to shed a little. The next day out of the blue, Cassie says “I accidentally got skinnier over break.. my stomach shrank”
• Yesterday when I got a pair of shorts in the mail, she said she loved the color and asked for a try on haul. I held them up to me and said I was worried about them being too big when I ordered them and she responded, “really? I would think they would be too small if anything.”
• Cassie was telling me how when she used to play lacrosse in high school, she was so competitive. Then proceeds to ask me if it seems like she still is competitive….  Girl WHAT?
• She knows I am a woman who only accepts being taken out to dinner and have them pay for me and one day she says “we love when men take us out to dinner and pay for everything. My ex always did that for me”… when no man since she’s been here has done anything for her.

Ladies, please help me out or share some tips in remaining my peace🧘‍♀️. I used to think this was sad but I now lack any empathy. She has an evident reputation of being absolutely batshit crazy.