I entered the world of FDS around February when my embarrassing Pick Me behaviour peaked and I realised I needed to change my ways. I was super excited about my new Level Up Strategy and all that but it turned out that my issues with men and dating sociopaths were more than just because of cultural and societal influences. I recently started therapy. I might actually have HPD which makes things a little more difficult and while I told myself to stick to the handbook, it basically took one pretty fuckboy to make me completely forget my principles. Something really traumatic happened to me, once again.
Now without going into detail he basically lead me on to take advantage of the fact that I was infatuated with him, intoxicated and just vulnerable overall. He turned me down the next morning, after he got what he wanted. I’m hurt, disgusted by myself and in complete despair because I feel like I keep making the same mistakes.
Now my friends think it could be helpful for my self esteem and self respect if I stand up for myself and send him a big fat text in which I call him out on his disgusting behaviour.
Part of me thinks it could be helpful, the other part just wants to hide and not bother or face him because my stupid brain still thinks he somehow deserves the comfort of knowing that he can just dine & dash without consequences.
I’m talking to my therapist on Friday but I first wanted to post here to see if you have any advice on how to stand up for yourself even though it’s hard and uncomfortable and part of you still wants the guy to like you.
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