This a reminder to set deadlines for how long you will allow someone to steal your time before a first meeting. To many of us get stuck in the dreaded talking stage and it’s a real waste of time if you have never met the person before.

Today I cut a guy off for this reason. He lives a 4 hour drive away from me and has a car. He is a professional athlete and fulltime student and seems to have a very busy schedule. He does have time to text throughout the day though. I told him I lost interest at the 1 month mark as he still hadn’t called me and I told him I don’t like texting.

He made sure to call me the same day and we have been talking a few times per week in long calls since then but today I got frustrated hearing him say that because of his sport we won’t be able to meet for the first time until 3 months(!) after we first started talking. I liked how calm he was but there is a balance.

I was comparing him to my pscycho ex that flew across the country to see me for 6 hours within 3 days our first meeting. I thought being with somebody ”less intense” was a good sign after only experiencing lovebombing. I should have cut him at the 1 month mark. This guy seems like a really nice and decent guy but I can not deal with being with someone this passive. What are your thoughts on this and do you have any advice?