The “What Do You Bring to the Table” analogy, astutely dissected… by CayLee Cresta.

Lonlinessandtitties · 2021-12-16T21:06:05+00:00

This question was new to me when i was back on the dating scene two years ago. I didn't know how to answer it, and was put off by it, though i couldn't put into words why. She sums it up well. For the particular gentleman who asked me this, i just stopped talking to him because while thinking of my answer i realized "If i provide all my needs, and enjoy my own company, why would i entertain this dude that asks me questions like this that seem to invalidate all i do?". I found fds soon after.

Plus i live in the south with all these so called "traditional" men. When they ask this, it's inane. What do you think a woman brings when you so badly want to be a husband and father? Unless you plan to marry a man, you can't do this without a woman.

vaguelinen · 2021-12-16T23:02:44+00:00

The first time I encountered this was before he even asked me out. Honey, you’ve got to get me to the table first! Even pre-FDS I was having none of that.

donttextme_k · 2021-12-16T20:27:57+00:00

I didn’t even know this was a thing until Tik Tok, looks like men love to ask that question on videos where woman talked about their standards. But I wouldn’t be surprise if I was asked that question in another form or subtly

Novemberinthechair · 2021-12-16T23:38:19+00:00

What asshole invented this question? It's a form of gaslighting.

hiphopanonymous98 · 2021-12-17T00:13:23+00:00

I have been asked this on dating apps- the first time I replied with “you have got to be kidding me” and the second time I just unmatched. The audacity!!!

christmasforoutlaws · 2021-12-17T04:36:57+00:00

I mean, if you wanna be ruthless about it, a woman is the only thing standing between a man and a svic!de at middle age. If women really had no value, they wouldn't be throwing themselves at us and complaining about their lack of OLD matches.

ceramicunicorn · 2021-12-16T21:06:38+00:00

This seems like a lot of emotional labor. Hopefully who she’s really addressing is women, because it’s not going to resonate with resentful, angry, entitled men.

They only respond to clear consequences, such as “I do this, pp no touched”. Not explaining or reasoning but very simple, direct, if-this-then-that cause and effect.

lucidlotus · 2021-12-17T02:39:06+00:00

The problem is it implies his default assumption is you DON’T bring anything to the table and have to convince him. No woman should be put in the position to do this.

DivineGoddess1111111 · 2021-12-17T00:38:22+00:00

"What do you bring to the table?"

"Dude, I AM the damn table."

Block. Delete.

sleepysiri · 2021-12-18T14:02:12+00:00

If you ask them what they think a woman should bring to the table, they won’t even have an answer lol.

Title	The “What Do You Bring to the Table” analogy, astutely dissected… by CayLee Cresta.
Author	MissouriBlue
Upvotes	122
Comments	20
Date	December 16, 2021 7:45 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/rhyh3l/the_what_do_you_bring_to_the_table_analogy/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/the-what-do-you-bring-to-the-table-analogy.1092108 https://theredarchive.com/post/1092108

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