I’ve been seeing my HVM boyfriend for about 6 months. We spent all of covid getting to know each other deeply and are just all around super compatible. He’s a hard worker, pays for everything, respects every (implicit) boundary I’ve set, he’s respectful and attentive in bed and when we’re out in the world, he tall and takes care of himself, his family is lovely (his roommate/tenant is his sister), we’ve gone on a couple trips together that have been nothing but smooth sailing, he talks about the future with me in a way that isn’t “future faking”. I just bought a house and he’s worked his absolute butt off helping me paint. He cleaned the gutters and snaked the drains etc. We go to church together even. I’m just smitten y’all. He’s an incredible man.

The ish is that I have a 10 year shit-show of a marriage in my past and I just can’t seem to relax into this guy. He’s thrown only green flags (except he was a little jealous in the beginning - I’m definitely the most attractive person he’s ever dated and he was intimidated by that), but my psycho narc ex is haunting my mind. At first I thought my level of healthy skepticism was perfect, but now I know I have trust issues. I’m in therapy with a wonderful woman who is encouraging me to fall in love again. But I don’t want to get walked all over again.

Help! How do I know when it’s time to relax and let myself enjoy this????