Who pays in the relationship?

Chantelmorris345 · 2020-06-29T05:25:22+00:00

Men value what they invest in, so the man pays for everything especially in courtship because he is supposed to be trying to impress the woman.I don’t believe there’s such thing as 50/50 because men can’t go half giving birth to children, and women automatically do more they make the house a home! So the man in turn provides for the family.

DivineHag · 2020-06-29T03:50:38+00:00

Im in a committed relationship. He pays for everything except when I feel like "treating" him (us) eg I'll buy dinner one night on the holiday he has taken us on.

OrchidLion · 2020-06-29T07:27:20+00:00

[deleted]

throwaway23004345 · 2020-06-29T06:08:58+00:00

One thing that always annoys me with 50/50 is that the man always seems to always be in charge of the finances while the woman is in the dark..... ladies please take a personal finance course! Or read books or something. Stop putting your well being into another man’s hands

dzgata · 2020-06-29T04:28:40+00:00

Men pay for everything always. From the start of dating to throughout the marriage. Women pay back with the multiple forms of labor we are expected to give in relationships. And men paying for bills and dates will never amount to what women provide.

AppropriateHoney6 · 2020-06-29T01:49:44+00:00

In my culture, the man pays for everything in courtship if he is serious about the lady. In fact , the man is embarrassed if he lets the lady pick up the tab at any point in their relationship. When a mixed group is out (guys and girls), the men pick up the tabs for all the women in the group or they fight over the bill- but the ladies never pay. In the marriage, the man covers the family budget and let’s the woman keep her own money for her own spending (clothing, items for children, groceries Ext.).

However I know women in long-term situationships who split the bills and pay 50/50 and it seems quite bizarre to me. Even growing up, the men would always find ways to pay for the women in their group...even if they were just guests. It would be disrespectful to have a woman take out her wallet.

GlamorKiss · 2020-06-29T10:33:15+00:00

I wish I could get a man to pay for everything and I’m pretty beautiful but it seems kinda impossible to me to find a man with a HVM personality, who fits my physical attraction requirements, and pays for everything.

That is my dream but I would slightly compromise on the physical attraction somewhat as I would really love to start a family one day. I wouldn’t compromise on someone genuinely interested in me and a kind man though who at least pays during the courting process

Throoooowawayyyyy55 · 2020-06-29T04:25:19+00:00

IMO when a man is truly interested he pays for everything. This is why guys who are playing the field split costs: dating multiple women is costly.

Once you’re in a committed relationship it’s ok to start splitting bills—but even then the man mostly pays.

meanemad · 2020-06-30T00:09:15+00:00

Nothing in the world can pay for a pregnancy or giving birth to a precious kid, the man must provide always, dont waste your time with losers, if he tries to argue about this, just NEXT🤷🏻‍♀️ Any girl can get a provider, if not the girl is better alone than with a man that is draining her.

Ms_Tilly · 2020-06-30T01:55:25+00:00

I've always expected men to pay for everything because that is what men have always done in my life. From childhood to now, I've always seen men taking great pride in paying for everything. This new 50/50 shit is foreign to me. My last friends group had a single man in his 50s and he insisted on paying for our tickets, food, and drinks. He said it made him feel good. The last guy I dated literally told me that he was old fashioned and felt men should take care of women.

I'm not suddenly going to jump on this 50/50 bandwagon. If a man is really interested, he will invest. He won't give another man a chance to impress. He'll do the impressing. These NVM and LVM just want to get as much as they can from a woman while giving as little as they can in return. They've convinced themselves that they're the prize. And pick-me's are encouraging it.

Ladies, don't settle. You deserve a man that wants to impress you. You deserve a man who's good to you ALL of the time.

Stop wasting your time (and life) on dusties.

OrchidLion · 2020-06-29T21:11:13+00:00

Women gotta remember we are the boss and we lay down the law. Males will do anything for a crumb of pussy and we need to just tell them we don't do 50/50. He has no choice but to comply.

4E4ME · 2020-06-29T10:47:04+00:00

If you're talking about living expenses, assuming both partners are working for pay and that it takes two incomes to afford the lifestyle that you as a couple want together, it seems that the Suze Orman method is fair; she recommends that each person pays the living expenses according to the percentage of joint income that they each earn.

For example, if one partner earns 60% of the total household income and the other earns 40% then that is the percentage that each person contributes to the bills and joint savings goals. After the bills and joint savings are contributed to, each person retains the remainder of their income for independent savings and spending money.

If one person is earning 60% and the other is earning 40% it isn't fair to expect a 50/50 split; one person is being taken advantage of, and resentment will brew.

It takes a lot of communication to sort out joint savings goals. For example what if one person wants to save to buy a house but the other wants to travel every year? This is where evaluating a partner's HV traits come into play; does each partner respect the other's needs for security, and for growth? Is one partner more insistent that their goals are more important than the other's? Can the partner participate in making sure that there is room in the relationship for everyone's goals to be supported and achieved? Etc.

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Title	Who pays in the relationship?
Author	AppropriateHoney6
Upvotes	14
Comments	31
Date	June 29, 2020 1:47 AM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/hhqznl/who_pays_in_the_relationship/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/who-pays-in-the-relationship.702909 https://theredarchive.com/post/702909

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