PPD: How should I interpret this comment from my guy friend?

TheGreasyPole · 2015-06-13T13:07:38+00:00

My bf thinks that my friend has been trying to fuck me this whole time, but he thinks literally every guy who is friendly to me is trying to fuck me. He gets kind of jealous and paranoid about this stuff and interprets everything as a sexual advance towards me.

Nope. He is being entirely realistic and remembering being this man himself. We are all like this, and he sees it in other men just as he sees it in him. All males who play this "slightly flirty game" are interesting in screwing the girl.

Had you sent a flirty text back to "panties text" and subtly escalated... Turned it into a bit of sexy flirting... And then sent the equivalent of a "I don't feel attracted to my BF anymore, but you're pretty hot, you want to come over and fuck" text he'd have broken the speed of light to be at your door.

This is men.

If we are sending you texts that mention your panties... WE WANT TO FUCK... You BF is acting like a responsible male by understanding this, warning you and placing himself on lookout for this guy.

Seriously. EVERY MAN WHO LIGHTLY FLIRTED WITH YOU EVER WOULD HAVE FUCKED YOU GIVEN THE CHANCE.

It's an iron rule of males. Women have to learn to understand it that way, because that's what it is. Your BF knows. He's sent those texts in his past. He knows what's up,

What always amazes me is how clueless you women claim to be about this. I am never sure if you are just not understanding men, or are just disingeniously lying to keep the beta orbiter on the hook.

We wants to fuck. The next time you receive a text like this ? Show your BF, to be safe. Then flirt back. It'll become apparent immediately that he was "kidding on the square" and making a joke of his true feelings so he could get them out there, with plausible deniability.

Take it as being "on the square" and respond that way and you'll discover that is his mind state pretty quickly.

He was testing your waters. Next time respond with "it's a warm and inviting temperature in here" and he'll expose his mind state in a rush to jump in your pool. BF or not.

CisWhiteMaelstrom · 2015-06-13T15:43:02+00:00

My bf thinks

You have a bf? Goddamn unintentional AWALT.

dvdwbb · 2015-06-13T15:38:27+00:00

Wait a second, 12 days ago you posted that you went on a date with this guy and he had an opportunity to fuck you. You had a boyfriend at the time?

Nazrath2112 · 2015-06-13T13:54:24+00:00

Ladder theory figured this out 20 years ago. He is trying to fuck you. Simple test. Ask him if he would be willing to fuck you but then you two would never talk again. I bet he goes for it.

MagicGainbow · 2015-06-13T15:59:48+00:00

If you read the original thread you would understand that I kind of gave him the opportunity to fuck me.

He's the one that friend-zoned me then seemed really eager to hang out as friends.

I found it kind of suspicious that he wanted to spend so much one on one time with me but he made it seem as if he had innocent intentions.

He kept mentioning his gf almost every friend date we went on so I assumed it meant he was really into her. Like why would he keep mentioning his gf if he wanted to fuck me?

I also want to add that he tried to get me alone to watch a movie with him a few days ago at my place. I should have known then but I was naÃÅve. What a weird guy.

My bf thinks that my friend has been trying to fuck me this whole time

Your bf is half right, your ''friend'' is tiptoeing around it out of fear, but you tried to fuck him first.

max_peenor · 2015-06-13T15:38:14+00:00

and would never cheat on his wife.

How do you know that? He said so? They are soooo in luuuuvvv? We've made marriage so disposable these days, why do so many think it is still sacred?

GayLubeOil · 2015-06-13T16:07:09+00:00

He wants to see your brown starfish

GuitarsAreGettingOld · 2015-06-13T18:17:06+00:00

Good responses from other posters and I think they are probably right.

Just to give a different perspective here are some best-case scenarios.

I check my phone and found out he commented on the color and pattern of my panties. The comment was like "Btw, nice red striped panties".

Well. Depending on the circumstances I could imagine writing this to my platonic female friends.

Say I am not sure whether she was aware that her panties were showing at some point and wanted to tell her so she could be more careful in the future.

How would you write something like this?

"I am really sorry, please believe me, I was NOT checking you out, but I noticed your panties were showing during the party and I wanted to spare you future embarrassment so I think it is my duty to make you aware of the fact. I thought about telling you at the party but were afraid to hurt your feelings then / didn't want to make a fuss about it and hoped nobody else would notice. Sorry again...I was not intentionally looking at your panties, it just happened when they were trying to pick you up. Please believe me because I heart my gf and would never check you out."

Yeah...no. I think I would tell her at once or write something like "nice panties!"

Again, I think the other posters are probably right and he is trying to fuck you. This is just another 2 cents.

He was also definitely checking me out throughout the night. Tbf though I have a married guy friend who looks me up and down every time he sees me and has often complimented me on my appearance even though I know he's faithful and would never cheat on his wife.

Yeah, that's actually a cool thing. You should check him out, too.

It works or doesn't work depending on your friendship/personalities.

I wouldn't check out my female friends because I want to check them out...it's to show "yeah, you are my friend but I still see you as a woman... not some asexual being."

I do that to different degrees.

One of my female friends and I have more of a brother/sister thing and don't do this much.

My other friend and I are different and make more comments about looks and do checking out and stuff. It's still completely platonic. You could call it mutual playful validation.

MethodiusIV · 2015-06-13T21:16:55+00:00

My dress was not so short that he could see my underwear easily so he must have been looking when he shouldn't have been.

This is a good example of hamstering right here. Go out wearing a short dress such that anyone could catch a glimpse of underwear and if someone happens to catch a glimpse of your panties tell yourself that "he must have been looking when he shouldn't have been" because there's no way anyone could see your underwear when you're wearing a short dress that doesn't leave much to the imagination.

In all honesty though, he probably does feel some sexual tension and it's completely understandable 1. from reading all the comments it looks as though you'd be open to fucking him and 2. you go out wearing clothes that are meant to arouse lust in the opposite sex.

mcmur · 2015-06-13T21:25:32+00:00

I don't get it.

You went on a bunch of 'friend' dates with this guy and now you're confused/pissy that he's finally making obvious advances on you?

Atlas_B_Shruggin · 2015-06-13T17:11:52+00:00

If you're cute every single man who has ever looked to you wants to fuck you. Listen to your bf

buartha · 2015-06-13T15:25:42+00:00

He's flirting and not a bit subtly either, which isn't acceptable since he knows you have a boyfriend. If I were you, I'd respond with 'Btw, nice creepy text, weirdo' and not contact him after.

Also, combined with your last post, it sounds like he's stringing you along to keep you as either his back-up booty-call or an easy source of validation since he knows you're interested but is lukewarm himself, which is why he's maintaining a flirty atmosphere while not going full throttle. I'm not the kind of person that believes men and women can't be friends since I've seen an overwhelming amount of evidence to the contrary, but this guy in particular does not seem like that's his priority.

Edit: Also, did he get married since you went on the date with him? Just how long ago was the date? 'Cause wife=/= girlfriend, which is what you called her in your last post. Sending that kind of text to you when he's married is worse imo.

wombatinaburrow · 2015-06-13T13:28:08+00:00

Inappropriate and boundary crossing, not to mention disrespectful to his wife. I would keep my distance, and let him know why. I would also let his wife know that he's tomcatting.

VerticalSmileyCyrus · 2015-06-15T04:47:01+00:00

Where do you live? There are some places where married doesn't really mean "married".

kick6 · 2015-06-15T19:14:40+00:00

My bf thinks that my friend has been trying to fuck me this whole time

likely

but he thinks literally every guy who is friendly to me is trying to fuck me.

also likely

He gets kind of jealous and paranoid about this stuff and interprets everything as a sexual advance towards me.

they propbably are, shame on him for being a phaggot about it.

haircombsnightmare · 2015-06-13T22:47:46+00:00

This is not a dating advice site.

Just pointing it out...

Title	PPD: How should I interpret this comment from my guy friend?
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	1
Comments	97
Date	June 13, 2015 12:36 PM UTC (11 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/39p97x/ppd_how_should_i_interpret_this_comment_from_my/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/ppd-how-should-i-interpret-this-comment-from-my.281633 https://theredarchive.com/post/281633

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