[ Removed by moderator ]

PurplePillDebate-ModTeam · 2026-08-14T15:59:49+00:00

No new N count or looks posts. Make your post as a comment in the weekly thread if it’s the applicable topic for this week, otherwise wait until next week.

Present-Afternoon-70 · 2026-08-14T15:35:25+00:00

This is probably getting taken down, but I’m answering it anyway because you desperately misunderstand what the double standard actually is.

Historically, women’s sexuality was policed because controlling women’s reproduction, inheritance, marriage, and economic dependence benefited men and the social systems they controlled. Slut-shaming was never some neutral accounting system where everyone agreed that sex with men was uniquely contaminating. It was a mechanism for controlling which men women could have sex with, under what circumstances, and with what consequences.

And your comparison to men who sleep with men is particularly stupid. A man being ostracized for sleeping with another man is not being punished because his body count is too high. He could have sex with one man exactly once and face homophobia for it. The operative variable is homosexuality, you goddamn idiot. You’re comparing homophobic policing of male sexuality to slut-shaming based on women having multiple sexual partners and pretending that proves the latter isn't a gendered double standard. Those aren't even the same axis of discrimination.

And yes, that asymmetry also protects sexually abusive men. A culture that treats a woman’s sexual history as evidence that she is dirty, untrustworthy, or less worthy of respect makes it considerably easier to discredit women who report sexual violence, while the men exploiting or assaulting them retain far more social legitimacy. That isn’t evidence that “sex with men is worse.” It’s evidence that patriarchal sexual norms punish women for men’s sexual behavior while allowing men to benefit from it.

You haven’t disproved the double standard. You’ve noticed two different forms of patriarchal sexual policing—homophobia against men and slut-shaming against women—and somehow mistaken their coexistence for proof that one of them doesn't exist.

AchingAmy · 2026-08-14T15:48:19+00:00

OP, you're missing a couple major pieces of the puzzle hare.

1) homophobia and heterosexism. That's why men having sex with men is stigmatized, not because of having sex with men in general is an issue. If sex with women is what is seen as okay, there wouldn't be any stigma against lesbians 2) These standards were made to control women's bodies and make sure a pregnancy came from a specific man. Patriarchal lineages made it important to make sure a child was the king's, or the Noble's, or landlord's etc. So they tried to restrict sex to only within a heterosexual marriage. The stigma against women is lingering from this history of controlling women

harmonica2 · 2026-08-14T15:51:47+00:00

I dated a woman once who said she was relieved I was not a virgin and had experience. This means she prefers experience, but is that common, and thus the double standard may be true?

k33p-1t-s1mpl3 · 2026-08-14T15:54:10+00:00

I think bisexual men, regardless of body count are less attractive to heterosexual women due to them not meeting the “masculine” standards that hetero women place on men.

The reason the double standard exists is because women by and large select for men with medium-high body counts and men by and large select women with medium-low body counts. Just like how women date equal or up in various metrics like income, confidence, assertiveness, humor, charisma, etc, men date equal or down in body count, among other things.

Anyone who denies double standards in dating hasn’t come to the correct conclusion that heterosexual dating will never be equal among both genders. Just like women claim “I can’t help what I’m attracted”, the same can be said for men.

IcyTrapezium · 2026-08-14T15:29:18+00:00

I agree we punish men and women for sleeping with men. I disagree that this is reasonable. In the age of condoms, hormonal birth control, PrEP, vaccines antibiotics, antiretrovirals, abortion and adoption there is no reason to apply different standards. Women don’t have to get pregnant or have kids if they do get pregnant. Once deadly Sti’s are now treatable or as with HIV livable.

There is no real difference.

Also I never met a man in real life who gave a shit about his woman’s sexual past. I’ve never seen or heard of a man even ask about this outside the interest. Some of yall must be hanging out with very insecure and sexually unsuccessful men.

ta06012022 · 2026-08-14T15:30:03+00:00

There's not really any double standard. Both men and women prefer partners with lower body counts.

The perceived double standard is mostly among men telling themselves that the standard doesn't apply to them and the people who believe those men.

Gold_Sheepherder6569 · 2026-08-14T15:25:53+00:00

This is going to get deleted post it in the biweekly thread that is going up this week

sillyhatday · 2026-08-14T15:37:20+00:00

I have never in my life understood why anyone cares about this. I would only care if I was so high it suggested a compulsion or psychological problem.

ThatBitchA · 2026-08-14T15:38:01+00:00

So..... having sex with men is bad.

And having sex with women is good. And thus there's no double standards?

That makes zero sense.

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ArkAngelEV · 2026-08-14T15:26:30+00:00

Until women accept that the contextual backdrop of attraction for men and women are significantly different throughout all phases of their respective lives, women will continue to insist it’s a double standard. And they will continue to be incorrect.

DietTyrone · 2026-08-14T15:40:40+00:00

Not sure I agree with this argument. A better argument to make is that lots of women verbalize male virginity as being a negative, even using insults focused on a man's lack of ability to get laid. Or how they lose attraction to bi men due to their body count including men. Those are more so double standards if said women also claim that body count doesn't matter yet still judge men for it just in different ways.

esp_1123 · 2026-08-14T15:42:39+00:00

I’m all for it being a double standard. Who cares? There’s plenty of double standards that both women benefit from. And taking a second to think about how hard it is for the average women to get laid vs how hard it is for the average man to get laid, you’ll quickly realize why this double standard exists.

wing_dingus_ · 2026-08-14T15:51:44+00:00

yup. for as much as women love to throw around the words “double standards,” they certainly don’t understand the definition of the concept. it only applies when differing perceptions are based on something that is OBJECTIVELY the same.

the most prevalent example i can think of is height. they will call a 5’6” man ‘short’ but won’t apply this same line of thinking to a woman who is 5’6”. despite them being objectively the same height.

Title	[ Removed by moderator ]
Author	Uuu270
Upvotes	3
Comments	36
Date	August 14, 2026 3:22 PM UTC (2 days ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/1voa8nh/the_body_count_double_standard/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/removed-by-moderator.1633055 https://theredarchive.com/post/1633055

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