This post is inspired by another one I made here awhile back and the discussion it generated.

Many women commented that I was somehow flawed because I expressed a reluctance to commit.

But there was never much argument for - why - I might want to.

I’m not opposed to commitment. I generally believe humans are built for pair bonding, and I’m still human after all.

However, with that said I am a mod-40s divorced guy and the number one thing that I gained through that divorce is: freedom.

I answer to no one.

I’m in good spot financially.

Outside of working with clients for my job - I can do what I please, when I please, exactly how I please - with no criticism or unwanted oversight.

My health is great - part luck and part personal discipline.

I have friends, things I enjoy, and an active in my children’s life and within my community.

I have my own space. No one disrupts it.

When I want, I can go to Hinge and get a date.

In short, I mostly have what I want in life.

It will not last forever, of course. I will age and my health will fade at some point. Perhaps some other bad thing might happen to me. I accept these facts.

Bad things have happened to me before and they can happen again. I weathered them alone before and I can weather them again. If one is bad enough to kill me, well - that’s just the way it goes sometimes.

Nevertheless, in order for me to commit to a woman I will necessarily give up some of the personal autonomy that I so cherish.

Outside of sex and the validation I still naturally desire from a woman - something I can get from dating casually - what does a committed relationship offer me?